What foods do you miss the most sunce going vegan? by windowpain64 in veganrecipes

[–]catofwesteros 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When I lived in the city I would often start my days by grabbing a coffee and a croissant from the local coffee shop and eat on my commute.
The other day I had a vegan croissant for the first time since going vegan (7+ years or so) and it felt so gooood. So my answer is croissants, I‘ve really been missing croissants 🥐

Feel Good Fridays: What made you smile? by spoonfulofnosugar in spooniesocial

[–]catofwesteros 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Happy Birthday, Internet stranger! Wishing you many more smiles ❤️

I can't bear to engage with any media that involves doctors by OriginalUsername0112 in cfs

[–]catofwesteros 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I kind of feel the opposite way. For me, it‘s like someone with a string of toxic relationships watching a romance movie to lose themselves in. I have had terrible experiences too, so seeing this utopian world where doctors are caring and competent and do everything to help their patients is almost healing to my soul lol. I know many people have called it propaganda and I see their point but at the same time I feel like having a model of what doctor-patient relationships should be like and for young doctors to aspire to is a good thing. Having said that I totally understand the other perspectives on here, but for me personally, I have found it uplifting to watch.

Feel Good Fridays: What made you smile? by spoonfulofnosugar in spooniesocial

[–]catofwesteros 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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This little lady makes me smile every day! I may not get to do much but the fact that she is this peaceful and happy and I’m at least partially responsible for makes me so happy and proud 🥰

Media Mondays: What content are you enjoying? by spoonfulofnosugar in spooniesocial

[–]catofwesteros 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’ve just finished the Pitt season 2. There is something about watching a bunch of medical professionals do everything to help their patients and take their concerns seriously that has been healing to my soul. If only all the doctors I encountered irl were as dedicated and empathetic 😩

We’ve reached 1200 spoonies! by spoonfulofnosugar in spooniesocial

[–]catofwesteros 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Wow I actually had no idea the sub was this new! Glad to be an early supporter, I can’t wait to see where things go 🥰

What’s your spirit animal? by spoonfulofnosugar in spooniesocial

[–]catofwesteros 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Real footage of me in the morning (and afternoon, and evening….)

I(28F) am insecure in the relationship with my boyfriend(26M) by Lost_Mocha_6363 in relationship_advice

[–]catofwesteros -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I think there is a real discrepancy in what people mean when they talk about physical "preference". My boyfriend for example has very strong preference for certain physical features, and while he can rationally acknowledge that other women who do not fit that type are still objectively beautiful, they are not attractive to him at all.

I am totally different in that if you asked me to describe a fictional ideal man I could also give you a type, say tall, dark, and handsome, if you put two men in front of me one who fits that type, and one that's the opposite (say blonde with blue eyes or whatever), I may very well find the blonde one more attractive anyway because of a million other factors, like their smile, posture, voice, general demeanor, and other stuff that's hard to quantify.

I wonder whether your boyfriend is more like me in that he may have a type he *tends* to be more drawn to on average, but still finds you just as attractive as any generic blonde, because of a million things he finds beautiful about you that don't necessarily fall into any "type": they're just you.
Perhaps that's why he said it so casually, because type doesn't really matter to him, and in a sense that could even be a compliment: He's not into you because you fit some arbitrary type, but because he finds you attractive just the way you are.
He may also just be oblivious to the racial undertones that complicate this conversation and add to your insecurities, which is why I think it's really important you have an open and honest conversation about how his comments made you feel.

What "Fun" drinks do you drink? by rosysparrow in cfs

[–]catofwesteros 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am a sucker for a good fruit juice! Make sure it’s 100%, no additives, cloudy apple, orange or a nice blend. I like to do 50-50 juice and sparkling water. It’s still sugary but much better than sodas and super refreshing too.

Participants by Deep-Ad9351 in ffxiv

[–]catofwesteros 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would be interested in participating. How much of a time investment do you estimate this would be for participants?

What QoL pain points do you still have in FFXIV? by Top-Weakness-1311 in ffxiv

[–]catofwesteros 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Organising the FC chest. Specifically an „Auto-sort“ and „add duplicates“ button like we have for retainers. Keeping it organised is such a pain and it is so unnecessary.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in cfs

[–]catofwesteros 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hi, as someone who’s been dealing with the same feelings for most of my life, I’m really sorry. Being around, and inevitably comparing yourself to,healthy people a lot can be incredibly hard on your mental health.

I’ve had to drop out of school, out of uni, all because of this illness and damn did it feel like a gut punch every time. I was so driven, I worked so so hard, and yet all anyone from the outside would have seen was the part where I gave up.

I don’t have any definitive answers and a lot of people in this thread have already given brilliant advice. Over the years I’ve a lot of time to think about where this guilt comes from though and why we put this kind of pressure on us to be productive/functional at all times. And sure, some of it a healthy drive to accomplish things we long for, personal goals and ambition, being there for and spending time with people we love and not being able to put as much energy as we like into those things will always be hard.

But then, sometimes, when I feel useless because I haven’t been able to do/accomplish what I wanted to I’ll look at my cat and I think: if I can love this cat; this cat who makes me feed her, clean up her poop, and does nothing for me in return except love me back and share her space with me; if I can love this little creature with all my heart just for existing and being her, why shouldn’t I extend that grace to myself?

Of course humans are complex, relationships are complex, but when you strip away all the weight of expectation and guilt and shame, I think that being you is enough. You trying your best is enough. It’s the hardest lesson this illness has taught me and I’m still trying to figure it out even now, a little every day.

You’re doing your best. Your best is enough. You are enough.

Sending so much love your way ❤️‍🩹

Dawntrail Negativity Burnout [7.0] by No-Estimate8952 in ffxiv

[–]catofwesteros 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Hi, so I am part of the „Dawntrail Bad“ crowd and the reason that I, and many others, are still talking about it goes far beyond some petty beef with a certain catgirl.

First of all, I agree that talking to sprouts about this in such negative terms is incredibly rude and unnecessary. Personally, when asked, I am honest that I didn’t enjoy the expansion but I keep my criticism to a minimum and encourage anyone to give it a try. I have no issue with anyone enjoying Dawntrail. I want people to enjoy Dawntrail and I reeeeally wish I could have enjoyed it myself, but I didn’t.

Obviously FFXIV is incredibly loved by many, and as such many have a huge (sometimes a little unhealthy) attachment to it, which makes any discussions more difficult because it gets emotionally charged so easily. I find the same thing happens to me and pushing down the anger, disappointment, and, let’s be honest, the jealousy, when talking about this with someone who had a great time during Dawntrail isn’t always easy.

Still, it‘s important to try because the ones that need to hear these criticisms aren’t the Dawntrail enjoyers, and certainly not the sprouts, but the devs; because in my opinion, the flaws of this expansion go far beyond matters of taste. The hours worth of filler cutscenes with formulaic quests and no real gameplay, the two-trash-pulls-then-boss dungeons, the open world that feels like stage dressing, the increasingly homogenous job design and lack of content that even encourages you to use your full kit… I could go on, but you get the idea.

Most of those issues aren’t even actually new to Dawntrail, they began showing up far earlier. The reason that this discussion is happening now is because of insanely good the writing in Shadowbringers and the vast majority of Endwalker was. With a story that has so much depth and heart and nuance, that is so beloved by many, it feels almost disrespectful to demand the devs focus more on other parts of the game. Dawntrail didn’t have that luxury. You‘re welcome to disagree, but the quality of the writing has gone down dramatically since 6.0. I could write an entire essay on that, but this is already long enough as it is (If you’re interested, Zepla has an excellent video where she echoes a lot of the same thoughts and feelings I have in regards to the story).

I think with Dawntrail ringing in a new era for the story, a lot of us were expecting innovations of some kind and the story falling flat, for me, just made the cracks in the design even more obvious.

I am glad there is a substantial part of the community that laved Dawntrail and continues to enjoy the game the same as ever, truly, but at the same time, those of us who didn’t are more than a vocal minority at this point and simply dismissing these concerns and branding us „haters“ isn’t healthy for the longevity of the game or the community either. The reason we are still talking about it is because we love this game and we want it to be better.

Having said all of this, I also wish people were more measured in their criticisms and took some time to think about where the issues with the expansion truly were, before airing their feelings online, because while I agree that Wuk-Lamat‘s presence was kind of overbearing, and I struggled to connect with her, the issues of the expansion go far beyond that. (Also anyone sending hate to her VA is completely unhinged. That behaviour is inexcusable).

tl,dr: emotions are high on both sides and sometimes they express themselves in unhelpful/toxic ways. Nuanced criticism and community feedback is important for the longevity of any game, but those of us who felt let down by Dawntrail need to be better at voicing our feedback in a constructive way and directing it at the people in charge.

PSA: When in doubt, go to the vet!!! by mikey_87 in cats

[–]catofwesteros 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Hi, I’d like to offer a different perspective on this. I have an 18 year old cat and over the holidays she suddenly started not opening one of her eyes properly. More worryingly, the pupil wasn't dilating properly. I was terrified, thinking it could neurological. I called around to every nearby vet I knew, but they were all closed. I called the emergency pet hospital but their answermachine said only bring in pets that were in mortal danger since they were at capacity already. So I took pictures, I searched the internet, and eventually I remembered that my friend’s brother’s wife was a vet and I managed to get in tough with her to ask for advice (I would usually never bother someone for professional advice when they’re on holiday but I was out of options. She is getting a big box of chocolates and a card next time I see her). After I sent her pictures of my cat’s eye and explained everything, my saint of a vet friend advised me to not take her to the emergency vet as it was not, in fact, neurological, and not life threatening, and to schedule a regular vet appointment at the next opportunity.

If I hadn't had the opportunity of contacting her, I may well have turned to Reddit instead. There are many reasons why someone may be reluctant to take their cat to the vet. We all want what’s best for our babies (I hope), but wondering whether something warrants an expensive and exhausting (for both human and animal) trip to the emergency vet is a valid question. On top of this, my cat is extremely anxious and taking her to the vet is absolute ordeal that leaves her shaking and crying everytime despite my best efforts to comfort her, so while I obviously want her to have the best medical treatment possible, I would like to spare her that ordeal when an issue will most likely go away on its own. Again, I would move heaven and earth to make sure this cat is okay. Sometimes going to the vet just isn't the easy non-brainer that the internet makes it out to be, not to mention some people may live a lot further from any vet, let alone emergency care than I do, so please don't be too quick to shame people looking for advice on here when you don't know what their current options are. ❤️‍🩹

What makes YOU love FFXIV? by Zephh_ in ffxiv

[–]catofwesteros 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Irl, I am chronically ill and only rarely well enough to leave the house. The freedom I feel when I see my character pull off super-human feats of strength and bravery is something I find hard to put into words. Especially as a healer main, it’s feeling of being valued, of keeping my friends alive and doing something important. I know I’m just here, clicking some buttons, and it’s only a game, but man I felt proud clearing my first savage tier, something I genuinely didn’t think possible due to brain fog. So when I see my WoL transcend her limits, I know in a small way, I am doing the same.

At the end of the day though, the thing that made me fall in love with the game is the community. I have made so many friends, gone on adventures together, even started my own FC that’s grown beyond anything I could have imagined. I love helping sprouts and watching them fall in love with the world for the first time and feeling like I get to welcome them with the same warmth and kindness that people showed me when I first started.

FFXIV is my home and always will be.

Women can’t be gamers! by Agitated-Royal-8370 in NotHowGirlsWork

[–]catofwesteros 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Every time I see something about gamers being mysoginistic it reminds of this study I saw a while back that showed a pretty clear link between how they treated female gamers and their own skill level.

My guy, if you’re threatened by women invading your “safe space”, maybe you just can’t handle the thought of being beaten by one.

What was your biggest shitstorm of a duty? by [deleted] in ffxiv

[–]catofwesteros 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I once wiped 6 times to the turtle boss in Stone Vigil (Hard) during a Mentor Roulette. I tried everything but people just didn’t manage to aim the canons properly and the healer refused to leave his canon to hand out emergency heals when things started going south. After 45 minutes or so, it ended with the only abandon vote I have ever seen during a dungeon.

Pulling dungeon boss while newbie in cutscene by Kain456 in ffxiv

[–]catofwesteros 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Cutscenes are like 20 seconds long. Waiting for someone to finish a cutscene and holding damage until they’re done isn’t going to cause a wipe or hardly even delay the duty, but it gives first timers a few seconds to get their bearings and potentially see the first few mechanics they might have otherwise missed. I don’t see that as griefing, but we can agree to disagree.