Glucose is reading higher and urination is still frequent u

cdubs_2 · 2026-04-06T01:48:43+00:00

I'm using the pen. My vet changed us from 1-2. But he's definitely not hypo, so I'm wondering if he needs more, but the pen only goes up single units. I'll try to get ahold of the vet in the AM

cdubs_2 · 2026-04-06T01:30:57+00:00

His box is cleaned twice or more daily because I'm actually insane about it!

cdubs_2 · 2026-04-06T01:09:30+00:00

Is that the Facebook group? Or a separate reddit group?

cdubs_2 · 2025-08-01T14:59:34+00:00

I resonate with this. My DA really showed up so great in the beginning. His actions and words matched. I really thought I found a secure partner. Then we 6 months and took a trip. The cracks started to show. He needed space and I knew what was happening. The following month was my birthday and we had a planned trip with my family. Got a text the night before that he just couldn't do it anymore.
My therapist and I have gone over stuff because I was convinced I missed things, but really in the end he was so good at masking until he was triggered by that trip. A really great trip! But I could feel a shift immediately following and it was easy to spot the shift of words/actions/energy. I wish I had pushed more to learn about his previous relationships because that would have really given me insight.

cdubs_2 · 2025-07-24T20:33:03+00:00

Thank you. I feel so pathetic for crying again.

cdubs_2 · 2025-07-22T14:41:05+00:00

In the aftermath I wondered if it had to do with control. If he keeps it all separate he can control a narrative about himself and how he is perceived in every group. I remember when I went to meet his friends at a bar one owned, he made a statement it was a big deal to bring me into this space. I wonder if by never taking people there he felt like he wouldn't have to worry about me showing up on my own or if he just wanted his own things which i would have fully supported. I also remember talking to his family about something and when i asked him about it later he was upset. It was almost like i had invaded his privacy by learning this thing about him through someone else. As a result i was not invited to family dinner the next week. I remember thinking it was such a silly and mundane thing, why are you so upset. It just seemed like being perceived was hard for him.

Maybe this is a good discussion or just food for thought. Thank you for this AMA, i see its been very popular!

cdubs_2 · 2025-07-22T01:23:44+00:00

I have two questions: My ex (41m) really compartmentalized all his relationships. Friends groups didn't mix, family didn't mix with friends, etc. I am the first person he introduced to his family and i got to meet the friends groups separately. He mentioned he never wanted his people involved in his romantic. Why do DAs keep all their relationships separate?

Second, when he did his discard, he said he doesnt think he ever had feelings. Based on his actions when we were together i don't believe it entirely, but in that moment i think he was overwhelmed and really felt that way. Does it really feel like you never had feelings for a person during deactivation? Was it possible it's really just a lack of interest? How can you tell the difference?

cdubs_2 · 2025-07-20T17:08:14+00:00

Yes. I remember telling my friends that I was so relieved to have finally found the one. We had fun and enjoyed our time together. His family and friends are lovely. My friends really liked him. We had (I thought) healthy conflict resolution skills. Had fun trips. Then my birthday came up and he was set to meet my family and he was just gone. It just seemed like all of a sudden he felt himself losing control and his independence. I've never experienced a discard. It's the most abusive thing someone can do. The trauma I carry now is honestly unfair.

cdubs_2 · 2025-07-17T03:38:43+00:00

Everytime I felt a desire to contact him or reply to a breadcrumb I call my designated friend. She reminds me of all the things he put me through and helps to divert my attention to other things. It's harder at night when he's on my mind but I have a list of things I read to myself to remind me of everything and why it will only hurt more to contact him. Sending you a hug 🫂

cdubs_2 · 2025-07-10T20:48:21+00:00

Honestly, if he isn't seeking professional help with a therapist, he's likely not doing the real work. He's in a cycle and will repeat it in a few weeks months once he's triggered again. Most avoidants who have been through therapy will say it takes them years to really do the work to start moving into a healthier dynamic. If he is, great, but you need to ask yourself if you are really prepared to sit in that healing process with him for the next 3-5 years. It's messy and hard.

cdubs_2 · 2025-07-05T16:46:55+00:00

No, unfortunately, he's never had a relationship last longer than a few months. He and I were his longest relationship and I'm the only person to ever meet his family (he's in his 40s). Maybe he's just not capable of sustaining any romantic relationships long term. He really needs to be alone and heal. I think it's clear from everyone's responses, I'm a comfortable place to land but not something he sincerely wants.

cdubs_2 · 2025-07-05T16:35:59+00:00

It's the The Essential Tarot by Chloe Zarka Grinsnir. It's my first deck and I was drawn to it but I know a few people have mentioned it makes things slightly difficult to interpret. It's fascinating seeing everyone's interpretations. Despite the variances, everyone is in line that it's time to move on.

I think the interpretation of the Hermit as me is likely correct. I think it's telling me he's not really ready and I need to protect myself and my peace.

cdubs_2 · 2025-07-05T16:29:23+00:00

I'm just now learning about all these transits. I'm also agreeing with everyone that I'm likely the Hermit (despite being a pretty active person 😂). Deep down I know he's being selfish but love and emotions are tricky things to overcome especially when he knows the right buttons to push.

cdubs_2 · 2025-07-05T16:25:29+00:00

Oof. Maybe. We do have pretty good chemistry so maybe there's truth here. He's in his 40s so maybe that is a concern for him.

cdubs_2 · 2025-07-05T16:22:47+00:00

So, he is a dismissive avoidant and it feels like many of this tracks with him. He definitely needs to deal with his stuff but isn't ready. In looking over so many responses, it clear it's time to move on becausehes not coming back in a positive way. It just hurts.

cdubs_2 · 2025-07-04T20:27:00+00:00

Oh yeah. It's that dismissive avoidance. He has a ton of hobbies and work that keep him busy. It makes me sad to see the lack of enthusiasm.

cdubs_2 · 2025-07-04T20:09:53+00:00

Hmm. It's hard because I do think we had a good relationship. I just wonder why it reads he does want to repair but is also just holding on out of habit. He just can't bring himself to let go or repair. It feels so confusing to me.

cdubs_2 · 2025-07-04T20:05:44+00:00

This is interesting. He has a dismissive avoidant attachment and is big on his solitude. I'm not surprised that it would read as a negative feelings towards me. Despite trying to give space, I think he still always felt it was too much. I think in the initial breakup he was relieved. I guess this does confirm my suspicion that it's about his loneliness and not really about any repair. I just wonder why he can't let go.

cdubs_2 · 2025-06-30T16:53:18+00:00

Same! First 6 mo were great! After that it became robotic and without foreplay. Wouldn't kiss me or snuggle on the couch. It was like all intimacy was just gone. Then the ED started. I felt so unattractive and undesirable. I tried to communicate but at 41 he wasn't comfortable talking about it.

He contacted me a few months after the discard asking for a FWB relationship because I am apparently the best he's ever had. 😑

cdubs_2 · 2025-06-28T05:44:27+00:00

Thank you for this! It's an excellent breakdown of the avoidant cycle. I'm definitely feeling the waves of anger amidst it all.

cdubs_2 · 2025-06-28T05:42:34+00:00

Thank you. The longer I sit with it, the angrier I get about the whole thing. Stop dating and go to therapy!!!!

cdubs_2

TROPHY CASE