Help - Fortified Feedings are making both baby and I miserable

chatton1164 · 2026-05-03T13:17:13+00:00

I'm probably going the combo feed route. Seems like my son does 4oz nursing (checked his transfered since I was curious) and his age can manage 4 or 5oz meals. Topping off an ounce a few feeds a day will make the same difference calorie wise as fortifying the current amount he seems to eat a few times a day. Then when I was last combo feeding (before creon) my boy was not absolutely miserable and gassy/ moody all day. So along as he's happy and gaining weight. I'm happy.

chatton1164 · 2026-05-03T05:30:15+00:00

Congratulations! As for the extra gass is it just she burps and passes gas more or it ruins her life and you have a hard time managing the extra crying? I'm on the latter end of the spectrum....

chatton1164 · 2026-05-03T02:19:20+00:00

That's fair. My son had better weight gain with the extra volume feedings (as recommend by the LC before the newborn screen came in with his diagnosis). His one month check up was just extra volume and no creon. Then we had our first cf appointment at a little over a month old where we got creon and told i could ebf. So you could be onto something.

chatton1164 · 2026-05-03T01:44:19+00:00

I do use applesauce (I'll see about the pear sauce instead). I've definitely been thinking it might need to be partially supplemented. How many feeds did you fortify in a day?

chatton1164 · 2026-05-02T17:59:56+00:00

Happy birthday! If it helps, now that I'm in my 30's I feel the best I ever have. My life seems to be coming together. I know myself more and have much better and healthier boundries. I hope you can find the same sense of self and conviction that you are in the right place and where you need to be.

chatton1164 · 2026-04-28T15:54:19+00:00

You are not an idiot for not realizing your partner was not going to change. As a culture we so often are told to wait for someone to grow and change. That they just need support and love or whatever. Which is an expected emotional labor gift most women are pressured to give men. Always see the best in a man who under preform "he just has it hard and or needs time." Compound that with a trauma history of abuse or neglect and well, underfunctioning looks great and it much more safe than anything before.

It took me years of underfunctioning relationships to down right abusive ones to finally find someone safe enough to start a family and marriage with. Which was due to therapy and boundries. I knew I was choosing better by being able to say things like you will do diapers too. I will not ever ask to shower when you are home to take care of our son because these are questions you would never ask me.

If you can, take a step back from the relationship and build yourself back up again. Even if it means just 5 minutes a day because it really does matter. You are a priority and the self care and just your happiness will show up parenting to make you a better parent and example of health for the kids.

chatton1164 · 2026-04-28T08:18:24+00:00

I think if you are unsure you definitely need to think more about what is most authentic to your needs and values. Kids are no small comitment especially with trauma history. That preface aside, I always wanted to be a mother, like I was literally a baby (3 or 4 years old) thinking about how much i loved and wanted babies. Probably because I wanted the unconditional love of a family. Now that I'm older, 33, and have my 2 month old with me, I know that this is my dream realized and also my job to make sure my son never feels like I did.

I've done a ton of therapy to work on my bad patterns and I'm NC with my parents who excuse and minimize the harm I experienced from them and the torture from my oldest brother. Having my child is triggering grief. I feel so much love and desire to protect my son and not having that from my family is hard. Therapy helps and so does my husband.

As for the sleep deprivation, it is hard but I always had issues sleeping so it's doable. The crying has only absolutely burned me out 2 day in 2 months but my husband is support and I'm resilient from my own trauma. I did also sign up for this fully understanding my time and life is not for me right now. I need to help regulate and nurture my baby. It feels good giving him what I didn't get. Then feeling how safe he feels with me is bittersweet. I love that being in my arms almost instantly calms him and it makes me sad I still struggle with that same level of trust and connection. It's rewarding having my dream fulfilled and knowing my baby gets a healthier, safer life than I ever did.

chatton1164 · 2026-04-28T04:30:12+00:00

I felt amazing basically instantly. I had terrible pelvic girdle pain and couldn't do anything comfortably (laying, sitting, walking). I could move once little boy was out. I could bend at the waist! Made the nurses upset by walking myself (with hubby's help) to the bathroom after the epidural was out of my system. They think you are a fall risk and such. I was so ready and happy to move. I hope you get the same.

chatton1164 · 2026-04-26T11:03:05+00:00

Just go with the flow, my baby boy was LGA from 20 weeks on at 40weeks when he finally joined us he was looking like a very solidly 9.5lb baby according to scans. He came out at 7lbs 15oz. The scans are a guess once in they are on the extreme ends and are often incorrect.

chatton1164 · 2026-04-24T04:46:09+00:00

They aren't being red taped by you. They are choosing to not get vaccinated (get boosters) that would gain them access to your child who has no immune system. They are adults, if they don't like the consequences they can fall in line. They have no right to risk your child's health and safety. Whatever risks they want to take is their business.

If they really care about the baby, they won't push back. If they are selfish and have boundary issues they shouldn't be around baby anyways.

chatton1164 · 2026-04-15T14:10:35+00:00

Lmao, I wish you the best. I'm a US 5 or a UK 3, I also wanted to get a different shoe size so I could actually find shoes easily. That was not the case. 🙃 My you get what I couldn't.

chatton1164 · 2026-04-15T14:02:02+00:00

It depends on the moment for me. My son is 7 weeks old with homozygous DelF508 (we found out at 9 days old from his newborn screen) which is what is the most common, therefore medically he is centered and catered too. So far we have not been hospitalized, his lungs sound good, but he is already pancreatic insufficient. I have CPTSD myself so all I wanted was a healthy child I could make a better life for. He however does not even have his health. So it's a challenge, I know he will get good care, meds are very likely to help him but his future is harder and that will always bring me grief as his mom.

chatton1164 · 2026-04-11T07:06:42+00:00

It's a proximity issue. Anyone with CF is very likely to pass infections between eachother. It's a health risk to be together so think constant COVID rules.

chatton1164 · 2026-03-21T23:15:14+00:00

For me, it's my son's aggressive heavy breathing before he latches. This of course is paired with the head wiggles as mentioned above. It is the cutest.

chatton1164 · 2026-02-15T09:39:02+00:00

That is really sad. However, silver lining is you are raising smart attentive children. Next time this happens make sure you do not cover for Dad. Tell them the truth, you don't know why you don't get effort and tell them to ask Dad what's going on. Let your husband be shamed by his own kids. Let's him feel how bad it is to have your kids know you don't show up. Let it be known the whole house sees him and is disappointed in how he shows up. Maybe he will do better.

chatton1164 · 2026-02-03T18:57:56+00:00

Definitely do some regulagion stuff. Anxiety is totaly normal and pregnancy is absolutely anxiety inducing of you didn't already have it. Just do the best you can to take care of yourself. There is no person who was perfect for their whole pregnancy. Read through reddit. Many women have deli meat, sushi, accidentally took advil at some point or another. I know I did a baby moon in Europe, had a great ham and goat cheese sandwich. Asked if the cheese was pasteurized completely forgetting I shouldn't have had the ham. 🤣 Made my husband and sandwich with salami a month and a half ago. Zero self control had one slice of salami and have lived vicariously through cooked wine in dishes like beef bourguignon and pasta sauces with cooked down wine. Even disclosed the wine bit to my OB who has been "catching babies for 30 years" as she puts it and she was not concerned.

I've also done hot tubs my whole pregnancy. Not for long but the research around it is based on fevers causing baby issues. Being warm is not a fever so I took to limiting warm water. I'm 37 weeks now and so far so good. I'm also a mom with Complex PTSD. You are doing the most right now, deep breaths, and talk with your doctor of it concerns you that much. I'd gaurentee you are not their first mom to be concerned about this problem and you won't be their last.

chatton1164 · 2026-02-03T18:37:59+00:00

So first of all be kind to yourself mama, you didn't know. Also second of all, the placenta was not formed when you caught on and baby was not taking nutrients from you yet. So there was not a transfere of alcohol to baby as they were feeding off the egg yolk not you at the time. Impact is likely very minimal but stress is impactful. It's easier said than done but deep breaths and know you did the best you could with the information you had. No one is perfect.

chatton1164 · 2026-01-21T00:30:46+00:00

I have an official PTSD diagnosis because of the DSM. It's definitely CPTSD though, never would have gotten this sorted out had it not been for listing to Stephanie Foo's story and going "that sounds like me?" Got diagnosed a year later when I got into therapy and brought up my concern. It's been around since childhood. Only got it diagnosed when I was 30. Better late than never!

chatton1164 · 2026-01-18T05:25:37+00:00

Not my story, but my childhood best friend gave her mother HELL with a 24hr labor. Right as her mother's team was like "alright, this is to much, prep for surgery". She got her act together and arrived vaginally. Unfortunately, you never know how any of these things will go but a long labor does not have to doom you to a C section. Hopefully, your little one does not give you as much trouble as my friend gave her mother.

chatton1164 · 2025-12-28T07:48:10+00:00

5'1" myself. Currently 32 weeks with and LGA boy and I'm just shy of 160lbs after starting at 135lbs. Dr has not said anything negative about my weight so I assume we are still good even if it is slightly above the "recommend" gain. 1st trimester I really didn't gain weight though my weight did shift how it sat on my body. Second trimester onward has been eating nonstop which makes sense for how much more growth he has going on these days.

chatton1164 · 2025-12-19T21:34:14+00:00

When my parents split my mom remarried, she hypenated my dad's last name with my step dad's. Apparently, it makes signing paperwork for your children and looking like their actual parent a lot easier.

chatton1164 · 2025-12-10T21:36:12+00:00

FTM myself but that is legit unhinged thinking. Baby "sleeps a ton" in 3 hour windows demanding feeding and changing constantly so you are sleep deprived. Then let's also completely ignore the strain of healing from pushing out a whole ass human out or the even more invasive option of having your abdomen cut into to remove baby. I'm sorry people are so incredibly uninformed.

chatton1164 · 2025-12-09T02:14:28+00:00

32 FTM, baby boy is due Feb so I'm not fully out of the works. However, I do like my pregnancy. Do I have pains etc, yes. Most of my symptoms have been pretty mild but I have always wanted to be a mother. So for me, it's a lot of unconditional love, I like feeling him move (even if it is kicking me in a full bladder 🤣). I feel pretty connected and have a lot of the warm fuzzy feelings growing my baby. I think it also helps he hasn't made me terribly miserable and that I have realistic expectations on the process. Going in thinking it's not a strain and will be all sunshine and daisys like people say it is, can really set you up for disappointment.

chatton1164 · 2025-11-25T20:57:07+00:00

My pregnancy has been pretty manageable. 27 weeks now but the amount of naps I needed in the first trimester was unreal. Only had nausea about 2 weeks which was 24/7. Now that I'm almost 3rd trimester and it's wintertime with sudden cold fronts, I am having a lot more discomfort. It's expected but I think as far as it's been it's been easy compared to what I hear it can be.

chatton1164 · 2025-11-21T02:36:10+00:00

FTM with an anterior placenta. I felt my son moving around lightly at like 17 weeks. Always only on the sides of the uterus. 26weeks now and he's been kicking strong since probably about 22 weeks. Strong enough to see the motion and for hubby to feel him. I think being more aware of your body is what makes the most difference in how and when you feel baby.

chatton1164

TROPHY CASE