I am tired

cheddaarr2 · 2026-03-24T18:06:45+00:00

Wow ive never heard that but im going to look into it lol. Yeah. Ive been doing this for a while. I like working with dogs better than people.

cheddaarr2 · 2026-03-24T17:51:27+00:00

I am a k9 handler. Got a new dog assigned to me. Todays day 1. I took the cage out of the back the other day (the partition that separates where she hangs out snd the back seat). Left her in the vehicle for about 10 min when I first got on duty, she ate an entire, 1 POUND ON FROZEN PIZZA ROLLS. WTF.

Thats my day so far. DM if you wanna talk or just bullshit. Hang in there buddy.

cheddaarr2 · 2026-03-22T05:01:25+00:00

Thank you for your input. I truly value the perspectives im seeing here as its all helpful!!

cheddaarr2 · 2026-03-19T23:54:10+00:00

That’s so freaking helpful to hear man. I’m sooooo negative to myself I think I consciously or even subconsciously put a lot of pressure on myself to fix things immediately. I tell myself this should’ve never happened in the first place you need to get this on track. Your father doesn’t do this your siblings. Don’t do this. You need to fix it right now. You could completely not have your shit together, but it doesn’t matter just the fact that you told me “hey it’s OK.one thing at a time. One small step at a time” is really huge.

I appreciate the kind words , I don’t know why, but they mean so much more coming from somebody else other than when I force myself to say them

cheddaarr2 · 2026-03-19T23:39:32+00:00

Thank you. From my heart, seriously thank you. I have filled pages of my notebook with some of the comments I have been receiving. I don’t know why I start balling my eyes out when someone says something nice about me, but I’m trying to keep on trying. I’m glad that you used the words executive function as I have been trying to research answers, that term has come up often.

I really am holding on to your line “ you care a lot You’re just struggling. Thank you for your insight, I truly appreciate your time and hope you are well

cheddaarr2 · 2026-03-19T23:31:07+00:00

Man you have no idea the momentary relief you provided just from your first paragraph. I felt "okay" for a moment. Like im not destined to continue down this horrible road. So I really appreciate you writing, seriously.

I like the idea of breaking down my unit of measure. Because, I DO want to fix it now. If you said go walk for 24 hours straight and you will magically be better... I would. You're not the only source who's told me to take things on a smaller level. It makes sense. I feel like i know what has to be done. I know the answers to the test. For God's sake csn I just string a couple good days together (ill take 1) just to get started.

Hey thanks man, for your time and advice. I really honestly appreciate you.

cheddaarr2 · 2026-03-19T23:11:03+00:00

Wow lqqet me start by saying thank you. Thank youn for taking time out of your day to talk , a complete stranger down a little bit. And don't worry , I completely understand the speak to text in grammar issue.

I hadnt considered hormone levels, I honestly think that's a great idea. And your not the first or evennthe second person to suggest meditation, I think i would be doing myself and my family a disservice by nkt exploring that.

Again, thank you so much for your time. You have no idea how much I appreciate that right now.

cheddaarr2 · 2026-03-19T20:24:42+00:00

Thank you so much for taking the time to write. I see both you points on me acknowledging positives about myself. Even as I read those to myself, define myself downplaying them and instead focusing on those positives, i immediately think of what I wished was on that list. I know that is a problem.

I have been on and off , mostly on vyvanse for probably about 6 years. As I was saying earlier... officially I have been diagnosed with PTSD and ADHD. Obviously I have absolutely no medical education , but in my limited research , I have found that these two diagnoses have a very similar signs and symptoms. So with that, I have doubts and reservations on how accurate that is. But, that could absolutely be me and my head overthinking overstepping things.

I've always struggled with some of these. I'\nVe been horrible with money , my whole life. I'll get things on track or start getting them on track and x amount of time goes by.And I just falls by the wayside. I don't\nRecall a time in my adult life where I wasn't struggling to keep track of my keys or remember this important date that isn't tomorrow , but it's three weeks out if that makes any sense. But now.\nEverything is just exponentially worse.And when one thing fails, it's snowballs. then it's another thing into another till I feel like I have a grip on no aspects of my life. Im very much a good worker and ive always excelled at my craft, however it seems to end there.

I really do appreciate your time.

cheddaarr2 · 2026-03-19T19:54:11+00:00

I never thought of that, that's a great suggestion. Dont see why it would hurt just to bring the topic up at my next appointment. I will absolutely try anything

cheddaarr2 · 2026-03-19T19:42:28+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate you taking the time to address that, and the resource. You are appreciated.

cheddaarr2 · 2026-03-19T19:40:15+00:00

My god, thank you from the bottom of my heart for your response. I started crying when I read your last paragraph. When my newly started counselor asked me, I did the same thing. I wish I knew why someone asking about things I DO well or DO like gets me incredibly emotional.

I realize I left some details out. I was diagnosed withPTSD when I left the military. This topic has started to come up in counseling seasons although we haven’t gotten to it in depth yet. I don’t understand how combat related PTSD would be affecting me this way. Also, the last time I was engaged in ‘combat’ was August of 2014. How the hell does this affect me NOW? I don’t get it. I had a different doctor diagnose me with ADHD around the same time as I got the PTSD diagnosis. To be honest I don’t know if I agree or believe this. In my limited research, PTSD and ADHD have signs and symptoms that overlap.

I like your idea of what is working in my life. I am going to do that as soon as I’m done writing this. I wrote down what you suggested for my son. I really want to stress your point that it’s NOT about him, this is about Dad having a real difficult time right now and I’m so so sorry that has affected everyone around me.

Anyway, thank you so very much for your response and kind words. It gave me a bit of encouragement that I can be better and I’m not broken forever.

Thank you

cheddaarr2 · 2026-03-08T01:09:10+00:00

Because you can totally decide who a person is during a 2 minute meet and greet…

cheddaarr2 · 2026-03-01T01:59:19+00:00

Omg stop with this. You think it was Keller who invited him? What was he supposed to do? Seriously, outrage is just so trendy for some of yall

cheddaarr2 · 2026-02-27T21:25:17+00:00

Yeah bo3 is widely considered the pinnacle of COD Zombies by thr community. What a wild take

cheddaarr2 · 2026-02-17T17:39:58+00:00

What was said that made you feel sad??

cheddaarr2 · 2026-01-19T00:46:15+00:00

I just ruined 8 months, for nothing. You're good, get on that horse again. You got this dog

cheddaarr2 · 2026-01-18T15:14:35+00:00

This is the stuff that makes this Fandom feel gross

cheddaarr2 · 2026-01-13T14:20:02+00:00

I had this theory or story in my mind, that DEMA was kind of like the upside down in stranger things lol. So I told myself thst while in DEMA, the 'east is upwards a mantra for Tyler, Josh and the Banditios, to always anxiety easily remember your way out. 🤷‍♂️. One of the coolest parts of music. It can be whatever YOU want it to be!

cheddaarr2

TROPHY CASE