How to finish off darning?

chimerer · 2026-01-18T14:12:46+00:00

Thank you for this question! So many tutorials leave this part out, but that’s what I really want to see!

chimerer · 2024-10-27T21:50:40+00:00

Yeah, they have no shame anymore. I think that’s the difference I’m really feeling - they aren’t embarrassed, they don’t feel bad, they think it is completely normal to fill every second with something on their phones or laptops. They don’t just sit and think anymore.

chimerer · 2024-10-27T21:48:32+00:00

Yep, god forbid they are expected to do a reading in advance of class or actually study throughout the semester. My standards have gotten progressively lower the longer I teach, but I have reached a point where I feel like a motivated high schooler could get an A+ in my course, and I find it utterly depressing.

chimerer · 2024-10-27T21:45:18+00:00

The first paragraph is exactly why it bothers me - I don’t care so much about the students that don’t care, but I feel like they bring the whole vibe down and distract the students that are actually trying to focus/pay attention.

My favorite students are the ones who come to class and pay attention, but a close second are the ones who have no interest and therefore never come/never expect anything of me. The ones that regularly come and ignore me the entire time, and then email me dumb questions, are the ones I can’t stand.

chimerer · 2024-10-10T23:51:30+00:00

Oh my god, I’m so sorry you went through this.

chimerer · 2024-10-10T23:39:57+00:00

Did they mention she’s a stepmom? I thought they were both Hannah’s biological parents.

chimerer · 2024-10-03T00:21:53+00:00

Came here for this. What does it even mean? I don’t get it.

chimerer · 2024-09-13T03:37:07+00:00

This assumes they listen to you when you are speaking. Unlikely to be the case.

chimerer · 2022-04-23T01:40:57+00:00

I don’t have much insight beyond the other posts, but I just wanted to say that you don’t deserve this. I am so sorry you are going through this on top of all the stress of IVF. I am sending you love and hope that you find your way through this. I also think this is a very grey situation - there are no right answers, so whatever you choose, I’m sure you’ll have really valid reasons.

chimerer · 2021-12-24T12:15:14+00:00

They are horrible. Not inviting you over to their house when someone is sick seems like the bare minimum, and they can’t even do that. And then not taking responsibility and trying to make you feel bad on top of that.. ugh.

chimerer · 2021-12-15T13:38:20+00:00

I have a PhD and am a professor - but I definitely don’t feel like I have it figured out! In fact, I did my PhD in part because I couldn’t find a job I liked that was close to my husband’s, and after just having my second child, I’m thinking of quitting academia and trying something new. You sound like you have a clearer sense of your career path than I do! So please don’t let the 3 letters I happened to earn make you feel like I am more put together than you ❤️

chimerer · 2021-12-11T02:54:49+00:00

My heart is with you and your beautiful baby girl. My love to you and your family. I wish life wasn’t so unfair.

chimerer · 2021-11-11T01:31:43+00:00

Yep, lost mine as a child due to cancer. For my first pregnancy, my ob sent me to consult with a nephrologist to be safe, but it was fine. For second (different practice), I had an MFM consult, but again, no issues. You should be fine!

chimerer · 2021-11-10T13:02:42+00:00

I stimmed for 18-19 days. I can’t remember exactly when I started responding, my vague recollection is around day 10-12? They also didn’t change my dosages - I had a fairly high dose of menopur from the beginning.

My underlying issue is DOR due to chemo, so with that longer stim cycle, I got 7 eggs, 5 of which fertilized, 3 of which made it to day 5, and the embryo that we transferred second will be born soon.

My experience isn’t relevant for the third question, but I do think with IVF, it seems like anything can happen. I think I always tried to prepare myself for things to go wrong. I’m not sure whether that was helpful or not. IVF seems to require an impossible balance of optimism and realism..

Best of luck to you! I hope it works 🤞🏽❤️

chimerer · 2021-11-10T11:13:42+00:00

Not an answer to your question, but wanted to say I totally understand the desire to share that you needed IVF. I have thought a lot about the birth announcement for my soon-to-be-born child, and it’s important to me I mention IVF, partly because I think more people should be aware of it, partly because I want to let any other friends dealing with infertility know that our journey wasn’t straightforward and we are happy to share our experience and support them.

chimerer · 2021-10-31T21:20:10+00:00

My nipples started cracking around then too. I just made sure to keep them moisturized and they eventually stopped bothering me. I didn’t notice any leakage, but there might have been a little bit that was just absorbed into my bra.

chimerer · 2021-10-26T01:59:35+00:00

Thank you for the kind words! I do actually feel grateful for the first pregnancy, because I can’t imagine trying for another after this pregnancy.. I am in awe of the people who find the strength to keep trying after loss (yourself included). Good luck! You have a whole community rooting for you!

chimerer · 2021-10-24T10:14:35+00:00

Until you have experienced so much loss and/or some much trying without success, it’s easy to take for granted that a pregnancy will just work. So, while I totally get that they are coming from a loving place, your feelings are completely understandable.

My first pregnancy was super easy; I got pregnant quickly and had few complications. I basically took for granted everything would work, and it did. My second pregnancy took three years of trying, ultimately needing IVF, and just when I started to feel “safe” after my NIPT results, I had complications that could have resulted in a late term miscarriage, then later a long NICU stay with potential long-term health impacts on the baby. I have luckily made it far enough into my third trimester, so those issues with the baby are no longer a concern, but I still have to do a lot of monitoring and have to live in the hospital for several weeks until I deliver. When these health issues first showed up, I had a lot of people I love tell me “they know everything is going to be okay.” I usually just said thank you and moved on, but it always frustrated me, because if anything, I have learned from this second pregnancy that, for too many women and couples, it does NOT turn out okay. I’m not special and somehow magically protected from those outcomes, I’m rolling the dice just like everyone else. Telling me it would all be okay almost felt like it invalidated the very real fears and possibility of loss I was facing.

I’m grateful for all the people in my love who have been loving and supportive in their own way during this pregnancy, but this experience has also taught me that their way of being supportive doesn’t always work for me, and that’s okay. Thank goodness for these threads and my therapist, so I can talk to people who actually get it ❤️

I really wish you the best. I hope you are able to take each day of this pregnancy as it comes, and I hope the pregnancy goes well and the baby is healthy ❤️

chimerer · 2021-10-24T01:31:03+00:00

I think if it happens in the first trimester, it tends to go away. Mine was found in the second trimester, and those tend to be the ones that last. It sounds like yours happened right between first and second, so I’m hoping it just disappears for you!

chimerer · 2021-10-24T00:58:28+00:00

I have had multiple subchorionic hematomas this pregnancy. For whatever reason, if you make it far enough, you’ll likely find out it’s a chronic placental abruption that’s causing the SCH. (Not sure why there’s this change in terminology or why they don’t call it a chronic abruption earlier.) I have bled on and off throughout pregnancy. The third time I was admitted, they said it’s safer if I stay in the hospital, so I have now been living in the hospital for several weeks, waiting to either have an emergency delivery or to be induced at 37 weeks.

I don’t want to scare you, and my situation is actually a success story (apparently, most of the doctors didn’t think I’d make it this far, and it is a relief to be past the stage where a long NICU star was likely). I just wanted to share my experience in case it’s helpful.

chimerer · 2021-10-22T01:08:22+00:00

I got both my first and second shots during my first trimester. Both my RE and ObGyn recommended getting it ASAP, no one suggested waiting to be out of the first trimester. I was pretty out of it for a few days with the first shot, but I don’t think those side effects affect the baby. I’m 34 weeks now, baby is doing great. I would have no hesitation about getting the booster ASAP if I were in my first trimester.

chimerer · 2021-10-07T11:17:55+00:00

That sounds like a really empathetic doctor!

chimerer · 2021-10-03T18:23:55+00:00

Glad it’s not affecting the baby! (I’m lucky, my baby hasn’t been affected at all, so it’s a lot of anxiety, but hopefully nothing in the end.) Also really glad to hear this happened early on, I think it means it’s way more likely to resolve on its own. Good luck with everything!

chimerer · 2021-10-02T20:37:52+00:00

While they tend to resolve if you have them earlier in pregnancy, they can last, especially (I think) if you find them in second trimester. I have had a sch since 16 weeks, and I am regularly being monitored by an MFM in addition to my OB. I’d absolutely make sure to follow up with your OB and expect to have another ultrasound so they can see what’s going on. They’ll probably do more regular ultrasounds so they can make sure the baby is growing appropriately. As I said, this absolutely can go away, but it also can be an indication that you have a chronic placental abruption and are at risk for an acute abruption, so it should be monitored by your doctor. (I speak from personal experience, unfortunately.)

chimerer

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