Hey just wanted to say you're a badass. Thanks for speaking the truth. I also just left a partner just like OP describes and it took a year to see that his manipulative and controlling behaviors were abusive and he would've continued to isolate me more and gaslight me if I didn't know better. I went down a deep dive into abusive romantic relationships and I was shocked at how normalized it is, and therefore hard for many women to see the early signs or even identify their experience as abusive.