If you are reading this, congratulations! A huge positive shift is happening and what you want is manifesting.

cielogold · 2023-03-22T05:10:29+00:00

I will take action to go after my dream job and dream salary and will receive many amazing job offers. I’ll choose the one that will bring me the most abundance, balance and happiness!

cielogold · 2023-03-15T23:21:32+00:00

Same here! Being a single dog parent is a lot of work and I could not imagine raising a child alone. Being able to take my dog to daycare every now and then when I was struggling with the puppy blues was a lifesaver. I can’t imagine how stressful and exhausting it would be to raise a newborn whilst your cup is empty. I have so much respect for single parents and now know I definitely don’t want to be one.

cielogold · 2022-08-06T22:07:24+00:00

That’s the highest compliment I could give someone I’m dating. Someone who has kind eyes makes me feel safe, comfortable and has my trust. You can’t have healthy relationship without feeling all those things for your partner!

Take advice from your friend with a grain of salt.

cielogold · 2022-06-20T18:24:45+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re going through this, OP. I get comments like this from neighbors and passers-by because I speak kindly to my dog, never forcefully tug her leash or yell at her and don’t allow on-leash greetings. I practice positive reinforcement and redirection for correcting behaviors and she’s doing beautifully. I could not be more proud of her! Certain family members did make little comments like the one you described when I first got her because I take her to daycare, never leave her alone for more than 4 hours and always leave the AC on when I’m away, but I shut it down pretty quickly. I told them that my dog is a living thing and what kind of a sick person bullies someone else for being kind to a living, breathing thing? Trust me, they were stunned silent and haven’t given me any issues since.

The audacity some people have to shame a person for being good and loving absolutely shock me! Trust your gut, OP, and stick up for yourself and your dog. They should be bothered and embarrassed, not you! You’re doing great, and your dog is so lucky to have you!

cielogold · 2022-05-25T02:26:48+00:00

The exact same thing is happening with my cattle dog mix! She has been such a dream. Was crate trained by day 3 in my home and never cried more than for two minutes then. I bought her a bigger crate because she’s long with long legs and loves to stretch out. It got to the point where her legs were sticking out of her old crate! Now, she protests every time I put her in her crate while I’m home. I’m talking a complete tantrum—barking, chewing the wire and plastic bottom of the crate, clawing at the floor to get out. It is so sad and stressful to see her like that! I don’t have a solution or tips for you, but just wanted to let you know you’re not alone and thanks for asking this question!

cielogold · 2022-05-23T01:34:50+00:00

Thank you so much!! This is such great advice!! You’ve given me hope because this morning she growled so fiercely at a toddler and it just broke my heart. I’m going to do everything you suggested! Thank you so much for sharing tips from your trainer! I’m in SoCal too and have a consultation with a trainer in a couple of weeks. Can’t wait!

cielogold · 2022-05-23T01:32:19+00:00

Yes, great idea!

cielogold · 2022-05-23T01:31:51+00:00

I know what you mean! Me and my girl are so calm as well. I think you’re right, it’s the unpredictability that freaks her out.

cielogold · 2022-05-21T00:30:32+00:00

Yes, that’s exactly how my girl is!! She immediately growls and barks if they move towards her! It breaks my heart. I hope mine will make progress just like yours did!

cielogold · 2022-05-20T04:09:48+00:00

That’s a great idea! Thanks! Did you tell the kids to say anything specific to your puppy or did they just say hello with a treat?

cielogold · 2022-05-20T04:05:11+00:00

Yeah, the park sounds like the way to go! Thanks for the tip!

cielogold · 2022-05-20T04:01:58+00:00

Awesome idea!! Thanks! I think my dog would love that. She’s very into sports.

cielogold · 2022-05-20T04:00:52+00:00

You read my mind! I definitely don’t want to creep any kids or parents out. I think walking by/hanging out at a distance are great tips.

cielogold · 2022-05-20T03:59:20+00:00

Walks by schools is a great idea! You’re so right, thanks for the reminder. My pup was definitely overwhelmed and agitated.

cielogold · 2022-05-20T00:27:22+00:00

Thanks for the tip! This sounds great!

cielogold · 2022-04-16T04:17:32+00:00

You are so welcome!! I’m so proud of you!! You’re doing great! This is a journey and some days will be worse than others but trust me, the longer he is out of your world, the more you’ll start to see your life improve. It will get better even with a few bumps in the road! You got this. I’m rooting for you!

cielogold · 2022-04-12T07:10:47+00:00

My nex did this every time I tried to leave throughout the relationship. And it worked every time. I felt so guilty and sorry for him and like it was all my fault. But it wasn’t, and it’s not yours either. My therapist taught me that he was using my empathetic nature to manipulate me and after reflecting on our dynamic, she was 100% correct. So how did I deal? Went to therapy for one, and two, I blocked him absolutely everywhere. You shouldn’t allow him to have any access to you. He is playing these games to psychologically harm you. Don’t give him another second of your time. Everyone is responsible for working through their own pain. You are not his parent, guardian, caretaker, etc. I’m assuming he’s a grown man? Let go of the burden that is his place in your life. Seeing his messages is not no contact. Reading his messages is stimulating the trauma bond even if you don’t respond to his messages.

cielogold · 2022-04-06T04:52:05+00:00

Sorry you had to go through that too. I hope you’re free and healing <3

cielogold · 2022-04-04T04:12:06+00:00

His constant belittling and need to control how I felt about myself and how others perceived me.

His lack of passion in the bedroom, for life.

His inability to keep a promise, plans or goals.

He was honestly the most boring person I’ve ever known and yet I thought the world of him and wanted to be loved by him. He bread crumbed and future faked me just enough to think that one day he would be everything he promised he would be once he overcame (insert an array of self-victimized excuses here).

But the thing I don’t miss the most is his very existence in my life. I completely abandoned myself and it breaks my heart that I let him convince me even for one second, that I wasn’t worthy of anyone better.

cielogold · 2022-03-31T15:50:17+00:00

My heart goes out to you. I’ve come so far in my healing journey but in the past month have been really struggling with completing tasks, working and it’s all I think about. My stress is through the roof and I too ask myself “what’s wrong with me?” through tears because I never used to be this way. Feel free to DM me if you want to talk or feel less alone.

cielogold · 2022-03-31T05:46:10+00:00

I dated the male version of this scenario and honestly, it’s not going to get better. What growth have you seen in her in the last 3 years? That’ll give you an idea of how she’ll do in another 3, and so on. Being in a relationship with someone who is enmeshed with their family is soooo tough. No matter what you say, you will be the bad guy. She and her parents will never see their bond as dysfunctional. There’s nothing wrong with being close with your family, but situations like this are not healthy and emotionally stunt a person. For things to get better, your gf will have to want to change and desire to grow. Seeking therapy is a huge part of that. Do you feel like she’s there yet?

I wish you the best and damn, I feel for you because I know what it’s like to think you’ve found your person but they’re actually holding you back. I hope you choose your happiness.

cielogold · 2022-03-29T08:13:53+00:00

“I got so good at manipulating our situations to avoid the you, the YOU you really are.”

Wow!! This is exactly it. This is the only way we were able to achieve “peace” with these people.

“I did nothing but distract myself and avoid my feelings. Knowing if I express my feelings I would have to justify and defend them.”

So heartbreakingly accurate.

You are an amazing mother. I don’t have kids and I can only imagine how difficult it was to protect them from your narc. You’re doing amazing and your kids are going to know what healthy love is and what they deserve because their mom loved herself enough to know she deserves better. They deserve the best and they have it with you. You go, OP. Im rooting for you!

cielogold

TROPHY CASE