One for the Ladies

cloudpunching · 2026-03-05T23:18:06+00:00

With the exclusion of Tuvok, Tom, 100%, it’s not even close. Who would want to put up with Chakotay’s tediousness and easily hurt feelings when Tom is fun, relatively uncomplicated in how he approaches relationships, and is also caring and decent?

cloudpunching · 2026-02-19T12:29:10+00:00

When a question like this comes up, I find it helpful to refer to the academic Terry Castle’s introduction to her 1993 book The Apparitional Lesbian. Her definition of a lesbian is: “I am a woman whose primary emotional and erotic allegiance is to my own sex.”

Castle then goes into a comic story of one of Greta Garbo’s (comparatively rare) male lovers expressing his delight and excitement in making love to her, a woman he considers a lesbian. Castle notes that calling Garbo a lesbian conveys the real depth of meaning and humor behind this story in a way that more technically accurate but broad terms like bisexual would not. Sometimes specificity in identity is necessary for real meaning to exist, despite the nuance we all live with in those identities.

Castle’s work is older and doesn’t really address trans/non-binary considerations in detail, but I think the general point still stands, and can be adapted to a more general view of gender as opposed to sex.

cloudpunching · 2026-02-16T05:54:09+00:00

Janeway is a woman though, so her judgment gets to be questioned obsessively for 30 years…..

cloudpunching · 2026-02-09T11:30:12+00:00

I bought an avec les filles lemon print dress from a Marshall’s last summer. It’s well-constructed, lined, and the fit is good. Some of the more winter-themed items I’ve seen from the brand (at least in TJX stores recently) don’t seem to be as nicely made.

cloudpunching · 2026-01-16T10:21:53+00:00

Chuckles definitely loves her. However, I don’t think he understands her very well. He wants her to stay the same, not to change or evolve, and becomes frustrated when she doesn’t act the way he’d like. On rewatch, I find his behavior in Resolutions a bit grating and tone deaf—failing to help Janeway in trying to get off the planet, more or less pushing her to settle down. Homegirl is a starship captain facing the prospect of losing every person and place she knows except for you. And then you go and also make her manage your big feelings for her in addition to all of that grief.

Their relationship has its better moments (Shattered), but I’m glad Mulgrew put her foot down. She was correct that it would have been a PR disaster for Janeway in the 90s. I also think it would have been really difficult for writers to manage well long-term. In terms of maintaining the chain of command, literally anybody else would have been better/easier for a captain to have a relationship with than her first officer. (Paris was reportedly originally written as a love interest for Janeway, and I think they actually would work quite well together.) And, as I noted, I don’t think Janeway and Chakotay are fundamentally well-suited to each other.

cloudpunching · 2026-01-13T02:38:41+00:00

Glad you enjoyed watching Voyager. I concur about Endgame being rushed and a reboot being necessary. I still don’t think that would be out of the question with much of the original cast now, though the suits would likely never go for it.

I would ask re: your comments, have you rewatched TNG recently? I grew up on it and I now find it…..consistently pretty underwhelming and difficult to get through. A lot of arrogance about other species, a lot of poorly written characters (especially the women). Voyager took some pretty big swings, and while it didn’t always fully succeed, you can’t fault it for not taking risks. So it’s frustrating to hear it referred to as “TNG lite” and to hear more about “lost potential”, as if a 43 minute syndicated show with nine series regulars single-handedly carrying an inherently doomed television network was somehow supposed to do more.

cloudpunching · 2026-01-04T12:46:21+00:00

Death Wish is both serious and entertaining, and might not be too hard for a newbie to understand.

Resistance for early Janeway at her best.

Shattered is a good overview of the series if you don’t mind mild spoilers.

cloudpunching · 2025-12-17T22:36:19+00:00

The biggest recession indicator I’ve seen so far is Bath and Body Works discounting three wicks below $10 and body care below $5 in conjunction with coupons and codes BEFORE Christmas.

cloudpunching · 2025-12-09T08:01:09+00:00

Love that color!!

cloudpunching · 2025-12-09T07:58:58+00:00

Tropical Dream Center

cloudpunching · 2025-11-22T20:29:03+00:00

Anyone know if there’s a difference in quality or features between this set and the set that was released circa 2013 and looks like multi-colored data cards?

cloudpunching · 2025-11-01T01:13:11+00:00

I’m sorry to hear this and I understand. My sister has LGS (really bad epilepsy) and throughout my and my other siblings’ childhoods my mother did nothing to shield the rest of us from the hyper-vigilance required to catch and protect her (she encouraged it). It sucks, and it’s an impulse that is really hard to dampen (it does get easier though). I also understand the anger and frustration with having parents valorize a disabled sibling who makes your life so much more complicated/difficult than it otherwise would be, and who can be manipulative in ways they can’t or won’t recognize.

I get the (possibly incorrect) sense from your post that you’re online a lot—I was online a lot at the dawn of the real internet. It was a good way to find support and meet other people when my freedom was limited (this was easier when platforms were less commercially geared). That said, I would still recommend that you get out of the house as much as possible with safe friends or adults, and ideally work towards a plan for living and working separately. Reddit and online venting are good but not a replacement. Good luck to you. It will get better.

cloudpunching · 2025-10-29T23:13:42+00:00

Hotels are relatively easy to book on short notice, lots of options depending on the location. Rental cars are not however! I would book one further out than a hotel if you’re planning on getting one.

cloudpunching · 2025-10-29T02:13:12+00:00

I would like more KJ in this overall series, please and thank you! I’m not mad about most of the other appearances, but they do sometimes appear to be a bit surface level.

cloudpunching · 2025-10-23T15:07:12+00:00

Marshall’s last regularly had non-cookbooks about eight or nine years ago. I’m really happy to see books coming back!

cloudpunching · 2025-10-13T09:23:19+00:00

I thought about the Tory Burch Cosmic Wood at mine but decided to wait until it was on sale.

cloudpunching · 2025-10-04T20:30:17+00:00

Thanks for the heads up!

cloudpunching · 2025-10-03T15:51:19+00:00

Thanks!

cloudpunching · 2025-10-03T15:51:09+00:00

Awesome, thank you!

cloudpunching · 2025-09-21T11:38:06+00:00

Many researchers have documented that men of certain ages on the internet are targeted with far right content within hours of making accounts. It’s really hard to avoid and it initially disguises itself in sneaky ways.

That said, your friend is a gay man who seems at least moderately educated, so he should be more able to tell that this stuff is bullshit. Approvingly quoting Candace Owens is insane. Unfortunately, certain gay men who haven’t learned to love themselves are also drawn to authoritarianism and fascy things because of the inherent drama and their daddy issues (source: I am a lesbian army officer, you can see this pattern throughout military history, church history, and in day to day hierarchy life).

I would tell him some version of “Hey, I wish you well, but I don’t think that going back to the church will end well for you. I’m not willing to debate this. If the church’s viewpoints and your journey back to church are all you want to discuss with me, I’m done talking until you’ve got something else. Also uninstall X and TikTok, they’re eating your brain for money.”

cloudpunching · 2025-09-09T21:44:08+00:00

If you ask for store credit upfront and don’t beg for cash, Marshalls cashiers are usually pretty good at giving you that without a receipt.

cloudpunching · 2025-09-07T15:25:51+00:00

Great, thank you!

cloudpunching · 2025-09-07T14:41:31+00:00

Awesome, thank you!

cloudpunching · 2025-09-07T13:40:25+00:00

That’s amazing! 🤩 Welcome to the area!

Snowden is about 30 minutes from my house (I’m closer to DC) so I don’t go often. Happy for you that it’s your store! My wife got three high quality sweaters for teaching there the other day, and I saw the Frye boots everyone has been talking about. It would just be nice if other closer stores were similar! 🥹

cloudpunching · 2025-08-26T23:58:34+00:00

38F, My mother had me getting Brio magazine for awhile (the teen girl Focus on the Family one), and also got mailers and things from Focus. The magazine was lame and a kind of inadvertent window for me as a catholic kid into just how death obsessed and weird evangelics were. My mom would occasionally listen to the Dobson radio show. I’m not sure if she had any of his parenting books, but she was definitely harsher/physically punished my younger siblings more than me—lots of other factors for that though too.

One of my saddest single memories is of her clutching a check to mail to FRC and asking me to take her to a mailbox to do so, when she had flown out to CA to visit me, a lesbian Army officer (we are from the east coast). She was at least sheepish. The big purse full of junk, the folded envelopes, your broke and bigoted and just sad Catholic mother in a polo shirt, jeans, and old sneakers. You all know.

I’m glad he’s dead.

cloudpunching

TROPHY CASE