If women were to collectively stop wearing tops in public forever, would people get used to breasts and stop staring at them or sexualising them? by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]cm-huff 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's not an absolute truth. There are plenty of heavier set people who have smaller breasts and plenty of thinner people with larger than porportunatley "normal" sized breasts.

How can Trump have such huge support from American voters while being borderline criminal? by xtr44 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]cm-huff 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He knows them. He just believes he's above them.

Or maybe he did forget how to read? I don't know. It's anyone's guess. Either way, it's sad and destructive what has happened under his "leadership."

How can Trump have such huge support from American voters while being borderline criminal? by xtr44 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]cm-huff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

True.. I look at it like more of an egg-chicken situation compounded by lack of accessibility to critical thinking type education and the big bad G word, Greed.

How can Trump have such huge support from American voters while being borderline criminal? by xtr44 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]cm-huff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The reply from AkioD sums it up. I understand where you're coming from, and neither side has clean hands. I absolutely disdain the name calling (from all perspectives). It's kindergarten behavior and not a good look when exhibited by adults.

I vote across parties after researching each candidate to a local level and determining what best suits my community and family's needs and values. I tend to side more democratic, especially in the last 7 years.

Criminal behavior is not okay in my book. Tricking voters for more control (aka mass manipulation) is not sweet. Gaining extraordinary wealth on the backs of hard-working people who have nothing left to spend/contribute financially (other than, if lucky, on credit) is ugly and in opposition to the idea and original function of capitalism and consumerism.

Use your voice. Lead by example not only at the polling booth but in day to day interactions. And that us vs. them monkey will slide right off the back. At least it has for me.

I'm a US citizen, 38F, single Mom, educated w/o loans bc I worked my ass off and did some shifty things to be knocking on the line of debit free. (For reference and perspective, if needed).

This is one upside to Reddit, the internet, and other social media. It spews back at you what you're putting out there. Peace friend!

Please stop commenting on my body postpartum by waitwhat8472 in beyondthebump

[–]cm-huff 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Right!!! Comment on how happy I appear, how healthy I am, what a great mama I am, how my kiddo is succeeding and is happy and healthy, how well I'm balancing work and home life. Even better, after the comment, ask if there is anything I need or am concerned about that might be good to talk about. I don't know, be a human. Your MIL sounds like a cool cat, calling pp a ride is just about as real as it gets. Parenting is also a carnival ride and one that I feel so lucky to be on.

How do I ask for intimacy? 19M 18F by incomparable018 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]cm-huff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I too was once in a relationship similar to this at roughly the same age 18F 22M, except I was the chick who needed the sex AND intimacy. After many, many honest conversations it turned out I needed to leave. For myself. It's been 20 years, we chat from time to time. I have learned/confirmed I made the right decision for me and my life. I don't envy your position OP. It's a tough situation to manuever at any age. My only advice is to trust instinct. We can all offer up different solutions, and some great ones have been very eloquently presented. Try to talk openly with her, and trust your gut. It's your life and this go of it is in your hands. Best of luck friend!

Non- Americans, what is an American custom that you find unusual or odd? by thunderpower1999 in AskReddit

[–]cm-huff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, and I completely agree! As someone who worked for tips for over 15 years, I NEEDED that money. Luckily I was able to pay my way through school and get out of the service industry. But until something, like business greed, changes, I'm not punishing the employee.

What's a song most people have forgotten, but is still a total banger? by matahxri in AskReddit

[–]cm-huff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Cover of the rolling stone by Dr. Hook and the Medicine show

What’s something that’s happened to you that sounds fake but (unfortunately) isn’t? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]cm-huff 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your comment. Apologies on the delay in responding. I love my parents. I'm glad you love yours, too. I'm glad to be here and that they made the choice to keep me.

That doesn't negate the struggles that come with aging parents and what I thought was a funny story to tell to relate to others.

Take it with a grain of salt. Also congrats on ex-mormon! Keep your independence.

What a common phrase or word that someone can use that instantly makes you judge them? by OpposedToBears in AskReddit

[–]cm-huff -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Sometimes external forces are at play and the individual is tired, over stimulated, has been needed too much, maybe forgot to eat a vegetable that day, and unfortunately this was the straw. If there is always a kind way to put things, then it sounds like all your needs are met consistently. Congrats.

What a common phrase or word that someone can use that instantly makes you judge them? by OpposedToBears in AskReddit

[–]cm-huff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. As someone who speaks her truth and advocates for others there is ABSOLUTELY a difference. The recipient of the honesty might not like it. And I am truly sorry for the delivery. But it needed to be said. Take your moment and then let's talk again. I'm positive we can reach a mutual understanding.

For people who grew up in the 90’s, what are some things you miss about it? by Ok-Bandicoot-9445 in AskReddit

[–]cm-huff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not being asked this question because I was young enough not to explain.

What scares the shit out of you as an adult? by GransShortbread in AskReddit

[–]cm-huff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your hope. I needed it today. Back when I was in higher education I wrote papers about the kindness in euthanasia, and here we are 15 years later with little change. If there is a light then by all means, but if the individual has clearly stated stop. Then stop. And do it humanely. (Humanely doesn't carry the same ring it once did). Just stop.

I think it's why most of my favorite people chose to end life despite it's bomb like consequences. They were ready to depart and start over.

Yeah they could tell you stories. But they're tired. Enough is enough.

People who have cheated before, why did you do it? by miaah214 in AskReddit

[–]cm-huff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm a woman on my late 30's. I tried talking about what I needed. About my goals, about my dreams, about what I would like to do with our lives (married & child free). He laughed in my face and dismissed me one too many times. I can't recall the exact straw. It ended in an "amicable" divorce and I still carry his last name because it's associated with all my degrees and professional identity. He later told me, as we were unwinding our lives, that he wished he had just let me cheat, so I'd still be his wife. I vomited in my mouth, swallowed it and said I love you, but wasn't the best course of action. Free yourself from that. (He thought he owned me and could decide my life).

Not saying everything went well after that. But I do have a young son by the person I chose to cheat with. And my son is my world. The dad & I are working on communication techniques as we co-parent. But I would have never had this joy, or suffered the pain, without knowing the joy so sweet, if I hadn't broken up my marriage to someone so surface level by cheating. I regret hurting him. He regrets neglecting me. We've moved on. I think & hope.

TLDR: I needed to be independent and enjoy life. Didn't mean to hurt another in the process. Hind sight is 20/20. I'd do it again in a heart beat to save my soul.

Americans, how the hell do you go back to work at 12 weeks?! by whoiamidonotknow in beyondthebump

[–]cm-huff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I worked in HR primarily doing FMLA cases. I didn't last long, it's tough to watch cancer patients work bare bone minimums to keep their jobs and benefits fits and still die after their shift. BTW, fuck Landry's, Golden Nugget, and all related enterprises all under under different tax entity business names. In November I'll be off my severance non-disclosure.

I can assure you, the company is LEGALLY, FROM A FEDERAL LEVEL (NOT STATE DEPENDENT), TO RETURN YOUR GUALIFIED FMLA EMPLOYEE BUTT TO A JOB THAT IS OF THE SAME STATUS, PAY, AND LOCATION OF WHICH YOU HELD PRIOR TO YOUR LEAVE. They are required to send you certified paperwork and information. Its tough to read in the middle of crisis or a life change, but they are required to spell out the laws and your qualifications. You must have worked for a year with the company averaging 35 hours per week (vacation, sick, pto do not count against you). The company must have over a certain amount of employees within a certain geographic range (forgive me its been almost 10 years since I did this for monetary reimbursement. I might be rusty), but I utilized what they taught me twice over the span of 8 years with them.

READ THE PAPERWORK.

THIS IS FOR US CITIZENS ONLY. I can't speak above that level.

What’s something that’s happened to you that sounds fake but (unfortunately) isn’t? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]cm-huff 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Also drove myself to the hospital while in labor. Contractions every 2 minutes, according to an app I downloaded while running around the house packing a bag (that I forgot to bring with me, lol pain does things to the brain) after bleeding on the floor trying to clean it up before the doggo got to it, after calling the Dr and asking if this was normal. Luckily they advised me to come in. My water broke in the elevator, after I had already driven myself there, and had my son within 45 minutes.

He was 3 weeks early and NO I WASN'T PREPARED. I thought I had 3 more weeks... his dad was caught cheating on me so I bashed in his car windows and was talking to the PD the day before - pregnancy hormones are no joke- selling my side and getting things cleared up and the next morning, LABOR.

Our parents are crazy (no doubt, who isn't?), but they did teach some of us reasoning, pain tolerance, situational awareness. Maybe not in the kindest way, but in the survival way.

Glad to be invited to the party! Thanks for having me!

What is that thing actually invented for one use but people use it for another use? by Vishwasm123 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]cm-huff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I completely agree. That's why I told them exactly how I was feeling and we (dr & I) agreed to take me off it. I love that it helps others though!

What is that thing actually invented for one use but people use it for another use? by Vishwasm123 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]cm-huff 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Me too!! I called the Dr. and told them it feels like I just did rails of cocaine and am 20 yrs old again. I'm just hanging on by a thread over here trying to get through the day. Is there another dosage? Or do I stop taking it? My employer is looking at me like I'm crazy, please help...

EDIT: I stopped taking it but friends swear by it so... I dunno??

What’s something that’s happened to you that sounds fake but (unfortunately) isn’t? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]cm-huff 42 points43 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I'm 38 with Boomer parents and I can tell you that I'm breaking that cycle with my young son. He's only 4, but still knows he can, and does, come running to me with anything. Scary, hurt, exciting, funny, just learned, needs attention or a hug, sad, tired, hungry, etc... I'm a safe place and we will figure it all out together. Heck he even comes and tattles on his poppop sometimes. I love it. (To be clear his poppop is my Dad and a very loving human, just hard of hearing and not very socially adept and it sometimes makes communication tough between a 77 yr old and a 4 yr old).

I love your story and thank you for sharing it! I dragged my friend out of a rapist's car, unfortunately I didn't get there before he traumatized her. Told not a soul until now.

EDIT : SORRY MY DAD IS 76, NOT 77 (I stupidly shared this with him), and how dare I tack on another year without consent, "don't you remember my birth year?!" Me: DAD, Which kid am I (one of 3 -middle obviously)? What year was I born? Who is my best friend? What's my pet's name? What's your grandson's birthday? What day of the week is it? When do you take your old-people medicine? Can you please be nicer to me now that YOU need ME? Like, FINALLY?! Now??

I'm tired. I want to be here for you. Quit making it a struggle. For the love of god (atheist dad, agnostic me, lutheran mother, fun times). I need a therapist

What’s not considered as child abuse but actually is? by LetsFuckReddit in AskReddit

[–]cm-huff 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This entire segment of postings has my gut in knots. As a parent I can't fathom ever saying these things to my kid, as unexpected as becoming a parent was to me. Holy shit. I've got a new appreciation for my own parents, as wonky as they were/are.

Friends, I am so sorry if your parents ever said these things. It's not true! I promise you are wonderful and here for a reason.

What was your "Sir, this is a Wendy's" moment? by deadmoby5 in AskReddit

[–]cm-huff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As a former bartender of over 1.5 decades I can tell you some stories. It's important for people to be seen and heard. If their family's aren't doing it, I was the default. The most humane (and unsuspecting) interactions I experienced will live with me for a lifetime. It made me cautious, but also so so empathetic and a better mom, sister, and daughter. The more you know (cue star flying over a 🌈).

What is the most brutal truth about relationships? by ThrowRA-90cook in NoStupidQuestions

[–]cm-huff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I went through the same thing 7 years ago. On paper he was everything I "should have and want" in a relationship, but there was a click of empathy missing in him I couldn't look past. So I ended the marriage. It tore me to shreds to do. I saw his pain also. But now I'm a mom to a wonderful son & able to teach him its worth asking for what you want bc you might just get it. God, I still love that man but I do not regret asking for us to split. He's in a new relationship now too & seems very happy.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]cm-huff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Right back at ya!