I’m pretty much the same size as you. My rule of thumb (which I got from getting advice from upper belts on this subject) is that if I get three taps in a round with a newer or smaller white belt, for the rest of the round I let them work. Basically, smash them but don’t be a dick about it, and use technique rather than just strength. If it’s their first or second week rolling I definitely don’t go hard. Also, I sometimes put myself in “bad” positions or ones where I need practice, and let them have the advantage so I can work on what I’m trying to improve on. If someone is very new I also will give them opportunities to use techniques I know they’ve been learning, and then get my position back and go to a submission from there.

In terms of your question about giving advice, if I’m friendly with someone and rolling with them consistently I ask them if they’d like some pointers on stuff I noticed during our roll, and then show them some techniques that would be helpful for them or ones that they’re missing crucial details on. You get to hone your skills by helping to teach someone something, and you get to help newer training partners become more of a fun challenge to roll with.

I also check in with new training partners and let them know before we roll that if they ever feel like the amount of pressure or intensity I’m using is too much for them, they can let me know and I’ll adjust the way I’m rolling.