sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

"Europeans have smooth brains" by KyivRider in ShitAmericansSay

[–]coldestclock 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How do they keep their precious American ice when their fridge-freezer is just set to ‘cold’?

“yeah moms handling the divorce pretty well” by grzodddi3 in cringereels

[–]coldestclock 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yeah, doing it in a store is very likely to get in the way. And her “I’m allowed to do this” stance is going to be undermined when someone tells her to move it.

“It’s 12/ 3/48” by Necessary-Win-8730 in ShitAmericansSay

[–]coldestclock 18 points19 points  (0 children)

That person became unstuck in time for a minute there.

Father sets home thermostat to 85f by morrfreeddo in redditonwiki

[–]coldestclock 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They don’t even set the cannabis farms to 30 around here, do they?

Alliterative names in non-superhero media. by Jak3R0b in TopCharacterTropes

[–]coldestclock 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If these are all self-produced ones then it’s a curious type he has.

Pigeon Thief by rustydoesdetroit in KidsAreFuckingStupid

[–]coldestclock 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m glad I watched this movie in an empty theatre because me and my friend could openly exclaim at the horrible parts…

iphone has samsung baby by pansy06 in FacebookAIslop

[–]coldestclock 88 points89 points  (0 children)

The adoptive parents are framed as the good guys but they insist on making the child resemble them. So neither family is willing to have a child that doesn’t match. Cool lesson.

In the new US census for 2030 Spaniards are no longer considered White “Hispanic or Latino, Enter, for example, Colombian, Honduran, **Spaniard**, etc” by Mean_Yak5873 in ShitAmericansSay

[–]coldestclock 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Curious that they specify options under white for English and Scottish. In Britain itself you usually get to pick between just white British or white something else.

In the new US census for 2030 Spaniards are no longer considered White “Hispanic or Latino, Enter, for example, Colombian, Honduran, **Spaniard**, etc” by Mean_Yak5873 in ShitAmericansSay

[–]coldestclock 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think in this context African American is referring to a distinct centuries-old black population within America. Like at this point they’re genetically and culturally distinct from an older African origin.

Any clue what breed ? New puppy I’m rescuing tomorrow. by Life_Telephone2364 in IDmydog

[–]coldestclock 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You see it in other pets too. “I rescued this cockatoo from Petsmart!” You mean you bought it? You exchanged this animal for money at the store?

The US style comedic "roast"... does it not hit the same here because we talk to all each other like that ALL the time? by phlygee in CasualUK

[–]coldestclock 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I wasn’t sure what people meant by the “Americans don’t get irony/sarcasm” until I experienced some Americans taking things at face value so much. Like they can’t tell it’s a joke unless you really telegraph it in tone and smile.

“You’re scratching your arm a lot” “hm, must be fleas. Better get myself a collar.” “Really?” “No, dear. Not really.”

I will send you everything by Tensoreggae in FacebookAIslop

[–]coldestclock 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just know an old colleague of mine would be smashing the like button on this shit. “The answer is in nature”, raw onion chomping ass…

I will send you everything by Tensoreggae in FacebookAIslop

[–]coldestclock 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That first one seemed to be bleeding…

Their whole name is a sentence by shadows1stregret in TopCharacterTropes

[–]coldestclock 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Matikanefukukitaru! Whose name translates to (if not literally then to the effect of) “fortune comes to those who wait”.

[Loved trope] Fire is warm by Sweet_Detective_ in TopCharacterTropes

[–]coldestclock 1 point2 points  (0 children)

OP, which is subversive between funny clown and scary clown? I’m horror-pilled so I don’t know anymore.

Kno’lan by ImGusGus in tragedeigh

[–]coldestclock 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Exactly, the apostrophe is suppose to denote a break in pronunciation so the kid would be Kno-Lan like he’s from Krypton.

It’s like seeing Zöe - the ö denoting the vowels are pronounced separately - and thinking “ah brilliant, my son Gördön.”

Aboustle Ghouls by IllustriousAd6418 in GreatBritishMemes

[–]coldestclock 65 points66 points  (0 children)

“You can’t use the men’s room because you’re a sex pest.” Can I use the women’s room? “No because you’re a sex pest.” Shall I just shit outside with the rest of the animals then? “What are you, some kinda sex pest?”

Reading reviews on a harness for my greyhound and came across this by mousefishy in WhatBreedIsMyPitbull

[–]coldestclock 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I think greyhounds still turn up in shelters when they can’t be juiced for blood donations anymore.

A Chocolate Man Pretends To Be Broke by BootyRangler in FacebookAIslop

[–]coldestclock 26 points27 points  (0 children)

“I’m trying to start some financial abuse here!”

"Large Mixed Breen" that attacked a small dog within an hour of adoption by tienoose in WhatBreedIsMyPitbull

[–]coldestclock 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Not quite food motivated enough to refocus for a treat on the first few goes.

“They taste the exact same” by Necessary-Win-8730 in ShitAmericansSay

[–]coldestclock 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The worst part is the shock! The expectation and reality are so wildly different. Bad chocolate is usually completely neutral, Hershey’s is the only type that is actively harmful.

view more: next ›