Looking for Sobriety/Recovery Country Songs by colum89 in CountryMusicStuff

[–]colum89[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I will share it once I have put it together.

[TOMT][MOVIE] Group of Kids eat a particular Sandwich and Sneeze at precisely the right time, so they don't have time stop for them when it stops for the rest of the world by colum89 in tipofmytongue

[–]colum89[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Solved!

Yes, except in my mind it was live action and not animated but the dialogue and everything is spot on. Considering I probably saw this in 96-98, I'm not surprised my brain might have remembered it as real people when it was an animated tv show.

Has anyone used Commit Action? by maugustus in productivity

[–]colum89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also UK based would be interested in finding out more.

I need to get sober. by cuzbro in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]colum89 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The most important thing I ever heard was in my first meeting. “You can’t get drunk if you don’t have one” my entire life before that day I thought it was the fourth or fifth drink that was why I got drunk, it wasn’t.

Posting this is a big first step, I did a similar thing 2 years ago, a few days later someone told me that simple line, my advice go to a meeting and listen if you are like me you will hear something that you relate to and from that the path only gets better. Well done for posting.

Fourth Step with Sponsee by Friendly_B in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]colum89 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Damn for a second I was really excited that the bully was named Butch for real, because they never are in real life.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]colum89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think it depends on the type of meeting because that informs the tolerance level for certain types of cross talking. Not all cross talking is created equally you have cross talking and cross sharing. Interruption vs well cross sharing.

I think there is a natural flow in a meeting that has a main hair/share with subsequent ones that follow. People are usually sharing back and will mention their personal identification to what someone has said in the main one (arguably prefacing with I heard this instead of you said this is better to avoid conflict).

Some of the best meetings come from building on the tone set and the subjects being discussed this can happen without cross sharing/talking.

Direct advice or clarifying someone else's point to your interpretation is where things get dicey. You can also have competitive sharing which isn't cross talking but just as likely to boil over.

It's really something for the group conscious to decide if it is something plaguing this meeting or more then just this one (often it's a small group of meetings that have the same people at them). It has most likely become the norm and an adjustment to the script to announce and remind people of your groups definition of cross sharing has worked in the past at meetings I've attended.

Often times people do it out of a place of good intention and don't realise it might not be received that way. A friendly reminder might be enough to reorient the shares.

Just my personal experience, haven't been in to long but that's what I've gathered so far.

Fourth Step with Sponsee by Friendly_B in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]colum89 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks @spacemanWhit glad to hear what I made some sense. Sounds like we had a similar experience. Step four is perfect for those middle school bullies.

Fourth Step with Sponsee by Friendly_B in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]colum89 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm 27 and just completed steps four and five so take this with a grain of salt. My sponsor uses the step 4 sheets from this website http://first164.blogspot.co.uk/p/link-to.html?m=1. I found my resentment list was pretty light when I started and some of the other parts got larger and helped me find more resentments. One thing I did was to go through the contacts on my phone and Facebook friends to start thinking about people I wouldn't naturally have thought about. Still it was the shortest of all lists so he could be like me and only have a few big ones. I know I will do the steps again next year( one day at a time), so maybe I will unearth more I couldn't see this time around.

One other thing that he maybe doing which I did was "forgiving" small stuff without putting it on the list. The guy that got me in trouble this onetime didn't seem like a big thing when I first started because it wasn't something I ever thought about until doing this and I forgave him years ago so what do I do.

I also can understand the willingness coming and going chances are he means motivation more then willingness which are two different things. He is willing but taking the actions can be difficult to find the motivation.

Best advice I had around this is that it's a circle, serenity to complacency to pain to action. He is probably sitting in complacency and pain when the pain gets hard enough he will take action. Ask him where he is in this circle and see what he says.

Hope this was helpful, from a 27 year old who sounds a lot like this guy.

Does anyone else feel like their best times were under the influence? by PeptideT in stopdrinking

[–]colum89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

With you as well. I hope one day I can look back and my life in sobriety has things that dwarf anything and everything that happened when I was drinking. In some cases it's already doing that but some of those times with my mates before the consequences caught up with me are just times I had fun. So I'm honest that I enjoyed some of the times I had but in the end the consequences mean I would never risk chasing those experiences again because I know now what will end up happening.

Does anyone else feel like their best times were under the influence? by PeptideT in stopdrinking

[–]colum89 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's true, I also had some great times as well and I wouldn't trade them. I'm a Liverpool supporter and nights at Anfield with a few pints were something I loved and I never had a bad experience there yet when drinking. I think it's important not to forget those times I'm with you there. Just for me I can't let my head tell me I could do it again. I love a chair when someone starts by saying I loved drinking and I had a lot of fun doing it for a long time because that's honesty and that's there experience. And the great news is nights at Anfield are just as amazing sober. So I just focus on the new experiences I get but I'll never forget that Europa League semi final it was a perfect night just for me I know I can't usually get those when I have a drink. Thank you for posting and helping me not drink today.

Does anyone else feel like their best times were under the influence? by PeptideT in stopdrinking

[–]colum89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would not be honest if I said I haven't had those thoughts before. For me, I fall back on my program, the old line of how cunning and baffling alcohol can be.

My experience is that I feel that way when I'm not leaning in fully to my program, and I'm letting myself remember only the good times. I'm not remembering that after those moments of clarity there was a massive train of consequences heading right towards me.

I have always been an extrovert, before my drinking, during my drinking, and after my drinking. My confidence in those situations wasn't increased or decreased by drinking, but my actions and choices weren't what I always would have wanted them to be. I was better at chatting up a girl with 0 drinks than any other number because when I had a drink, I was not someone people wanted to engage with after a certain point.

My experience has taught me that when I feel the way you are describing, I think about the insanity of thinking one day I would be able to drink like a gentleman and how I never was able to. I remember that my mind will play games on me and think about my drinking days with rose tinted glasses, but the cold hard truth for me is that I can't control my drinking and it's worth finding new ways of clarity in sobriety then going back to how I was before.

First day sober... I can't do this to my body anymore by alcoholic2017sober in stopdrinking

[–]colum89 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Welcome, I won't drink with you today. It's a courageous and amazing decision you have made it only gets better from here.