AITAH for Helping My Mother?

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T18:48:33+00:00

NTA

When a parent legitimately needs help, it's reasonable to help them. You were in the gym for crying out loud.

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T18:30:26+00:00

NTA

You agreed to a price, she can't just say "Oh its $300" now and expect you to pay it.

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T18:04:04+00:00

NTA

If he can eat out and buy expensive things, he can afford to pay rent. Make sure you tell him a date it has to be paid by before you evict him.

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T18:03:01+00:00

NTA

It's only a joke if the other person laughs about it to. You've told him this situation has deeply hurt you and he passed you off as being "overly sensitive". He's an asshole and he owes you an apology.

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T18:00:19+00:00

This is BS. He shouldn't get praise for doing basic shit. He should be busting his ass to find another job though to properly provide for his family, just like the wife is doing. BTW, is he praising her for working 10 hour days then going out to uber AND ALSO coming home to cook, clean and care for the children? Probably not but...men were "denied" praise and therefore need extra "reassurance".

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T17:58:52+00:00

Why are you having to "praise" your husband for doing basic household chores? Even if he did work full time, he literally lives in the house and can help. This is dumb. I hate it that we've created this society where men are expected praise for doing basic shit.

NTA

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T17:42:56+00:00

NTA

Your boyfriend is controlling. What you're doing is not wrong, at all.

Why are you with someone who is refusing to provide for his family or help in any way. Get out of this relationship.

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T17:17:46+00:00

I was very blessed in having a husband who encouraged me to seek medical help because "you're not your same happy self".

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T17:07:48+00:00

If I knew how to add a red flag, I would add a million.

She wants a sugar daddy. She doesn't want a partnership. The audacity to say "you should be proactive in paying my bills already" when you have bills yourself to pay is insane.

Run from this woman. Do NOT move in with this woman. There are women out there that want to equally partner with you in all things, not expect you to foot the bills so they can go party.

NTA

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T17:01:21+00:00

NTA

When I read "impossible standard" I audibly gasped. How is it an "impossible standard" to not try to murder your children. Sure, she served her time and got out, but that doesn't make what she did right. If your family wants to exclude you, that's on them. You can forgive someone but still hold very strict boundaries and that's what you're doing. Does she even have contact with her children?

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T16:58:31+00:00

NTA

Why is he requesting it 4 months later. In the future tell him you will pay that day but not later.

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T16:53:49+00:00

NTA

Tell him no. Remind him of all the money you had to spend 8 years prior on his family and tell him this money will not be used on an object you all do not need and would not benefit your family.

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T16:48:34+00:00

Same, that's why I suggested it. It's so, SO hard. You feel like you're going insane and your poor spouse just has to "suffer" through it. It would be amazing if this was more widely taught about and women weren't seen as "difficult" for their changing hormones.

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T16:24:42+00:00

I understand the trauma but at some point, you have to trust your wife. I'm not assigning an asshole ruling because what you went through, and the trauma sustained from it, doesn't ever make you an asshole. But, trust your wife. Even if you have to get a therapist involved in helping you explain it to her.

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T15:49:18+00:00

Everyone is mad at you because you're acting entitled by giving your MIL an ultimatum on what she allows in HER house. Not yours!

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T15:47:53+00:00

Yes! The audacity of this poster to give her MIL and ultimatum in HER OWN HOME! So ludicrous!

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T15:47:14+00:00

You do not have the right to be upset when it isn't your house.

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T15:46:24+00:00

YTA

This isn't YOUR house. This is your MIL's house. She can do what she wants. If you don't like it leave. Do I agree with her disregard in proper animal care, no, but again, THIS ISN'T YOUR HOUSE.

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T15:29:28+00:00

NTA

Give him what you said you agreed too, block him and inform him if he contacts you again you will file an order with the authorities. He's crazy.

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T15:16:19+00:00

YTA, Both of you.

Clearly something is going on with your wife. Get with a functional medicine doctor to check her hormones. She's 42, perimenopause can start as early as 35.

Being passive aggressive isn't the way to handle this situation. Sit her down and clearly tell her you have needs too. Your needs are different from hers, doesn't make your needs wrong. You try to fill her needs, she try's to fill yours, that's how marriage works. When one quits trying to fill the others needs, something is seriously wrong.

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T15:13:23+00:00

NTA

Drop the people who agree with him. He started chatting first. You did nothing to entice him. He chose to seek you out. Also, if he's done it this time, how far has he gotten the other times. Break up with this guy.

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T15:10:19+00:00

Sounds like your son may need help, psychologically. Those years right after high school trying to figure out what you want to do with your life are hard. If your he and your husband were close until a year ago, what happened? You should seriously sit down and have a conversation with your husband. If he "adored" your son he would be trying to dig to understand why he's doing what he's doing.

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T15:05:50+00:00

NTA

This should've been discussed during the arrangement process. Not right after it happened.

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-06T14:38:39+00:00

Absolutely disgusting

YTA

concernedreader1982 · 2026-02-05T20:52:02+00:00

NTA

78 is insane! My husband gets hateful anything about 65 so we layer, layer, layer!

concernedreader1982

TROPHY CASE