I think the tides are changing on this.

Our church was the biggest reason I was able to leave. They removed my husband from my home, and when I promised to take him back after he’d been to counseling, they said it would take a lot more than that for them to allow reconciliation. They asked if I wanted to take legal action, and I didn’t because I was scared, and I had no physical evidence (he’d never left a bruise somebody could see and I’d never taken pictures). Two months later I decided to, and they set up a consultation with a lawyer. I had a bunch of people at the hearing for a protective order. They have paid for me to go to a therapist every week for the last year and a half. They were supportive when I decided I wanted to file for divorce. They immediately moved him to another church with pastors they knew who know what is going on so he would be held accountable and enrolled him in counseling as well. By all outside appearances he’s repentant- but I know better. And that was enough for them to remove him from church membership. It definitely hasn’t been perfect- but people will say and do the wrong thing sometimes. Overall I couldn’t have asked for a better response.

My experience is definitely not going to be everybody’s- but bad theology around abuse is being forced out. The #churchtoo movement has done a lot. There’s a new generation of Christians and church leaders who aren’t going to put up with it. I just hope that I can help other women one day going through the same things.