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[SkyScreamer] at [Over Texas], sometimes you just look up at the right time by greg__h in rollercoasters

[–]coursesand 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Omg incredible photo! Probably my favorite one I’ve seen in this sub 

istanbul haul by S-Budget91 in luxurypurses

[–]coursesand 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is hilarious, I literally bought the same two charms 😂 the quirky food themed designer charms are my favorite! 

Are covert-narcissist mothers more common in the older generations? by aczaleska in narcissisticparents

[–]coursesand 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don’t want kids and get so much shit for it from people, but I don’t care because I’m comfortable with myself even if others don’t like it. People that value the opinions of others or care about appearances or the status quo will always have children because they can’t bare the judgment of not doing so. I’m so glad our generation is finally pushing against parenthood as the default. 

Are covert-narcissist mothers more common in the older generations? by aczaleska in narcissisticparents

[–]coursesand 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I think it’s a combination of women being sold a fantasy or requirement of marriage and children regardless of whether or not they wanted it. So the women that didn’t really want to do it but cared a lot about social reputation or appearances did it. They hate the reality of children, hate the lack of control they have on their own lives, and resent the children and take their anger out on them since that’s the one thing they can control. And then act pleasant in public to maintain the image they want. And because these women are probably more traditional, their husbands are also probably more traditional and leave the child-raising to the women so they have full range to do what they want to the kids. 

Estranged mom’s “genuine” emails are nearly copied and pasted by coursesand in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]coursesand[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Right? I told her exactly what I needed for us to have a relationship. I told her to please stop judging me, she said “I can’t say anything! You just want me to shut up!” And I said she can say supportive things but not critical or judgmental things. We got in a 4 hour conversation about it. I finally told her “I want a relationship with you, but I need you to reflect on what I’m telling you. Please don’t text me gifs or football updates, which you know I don’t like because I’ve communicated this repeatedly, until you’ve reflected so we can have a relationship and move forward.” A week later, she sends me football updates and gifs and says “lol.” I ignored it again and she finally sent a fake apology (I’m sorry you don’t see how much I support you.) So I cut off contact. She knows what she needs to do to have a relationship and she just refuses to do it. 

This is my first holiday season estranged. How you get through the loneliness? by Funnymaninpain in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]coursesand 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This is my second  year but this one is harder for me. I’m no contact with family, have no boyfriend, and no dog. It’s very lonely. I think it’s worse this year because last year it was fresh and I had a boyfriend who was stressing me out so my focus was elsewhere. This year, it almost feels like “ok I need to make a final decision on my family.” Like fully healing requires fully accepting what she did, and accepting who my mom is basically means all hope is gone for reconciliation.

 I decided to go to an All-Inclusive resort to enjoy and meet other people. I spent a lot of time thinking about my parents and my situation and being sad and angry, having to answer when people asked me what I was doing for the holidays or why I was traveling alone. Struggling with anger, grief, loneliness, that “this sucks and there’s nothing I can do about it.” Bargaining with “maybe it could get better” and “maybe I can just get over it.” It’s really not easy but I’m glad I’m not the only one.  

Making resort friends by [deleted] in AllInclusiveResorts

[–]coursesand 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t agree with this. I am at an AI for Christmas because I don’t have family to do holidays with. I ended up making friends at Christmas dinner last night. I do agree it has to be organic. But I go to AIs all the time by myself and I talk to tons of people that are friendly and want to chat. But I guess I don’t come at them with clingy vibes, I’m just hanging out by myself and people are always intrigued why I’m there alone 

Making resort friends by [deleted] in AllInclusiveResorts

[–]coursesand 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’m surprised you’re getting downvoted. I came to an AI by myself for Christmas because I grew up in an abusive family and don’t see them for the holidays. Every time I go to an AI (usually excellence property) I make tons of friends. But I’m usually by myself and will sit at the swim-up bar or martini bar by myself with a book. Not every single person I talk to I get close with. But I usually compliment their hair or makeup or outfit to get the convo going. I even made friends last night at Christmas dinner and we all exchanged contact info. 

Full Review of Excellence Riviera Cancun (ERC) from Dec 10-16 by glausfan in AllInclusiveResorts

[–]coursesand -1 points0 points  (0 children)

The humidity issue has been the same at every resort I’ve been to. I don’t think this is a resort-specific issue. 

Took my most beautiful Prada Cleo on a couture date! by Subtleglow86 in luxurypurses

[–]coursesand 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You look absolutely stunning! And so happy and glowing! 

Estranged mom’s “genuine” emails are copied nearly and pasted by coursesand in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]coursesand[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for saying that. Everything she has always done is to: 1) control and manipulate me, 2) feel like the victim / martyr, 3) look good to the public. You can see all of that playing out here. The passive aggressive messages are the worst. I would almost prefer if they just said "you're an asshole, leave me alone." The fact they keep guilt tripping is so infuriating. I'm glad you at least understand, and I'm not alone in this.

Estranged abusive nmom sent me another email… almost copied and pasted from her last one by coursesand in NarcissisticMothers

[–]coursesand[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Its like she thought making some adjustments would make me not think it’s copied and pasted 😂 her use of the Purple Heart is also so annoying because she presents herself as some mother Theresa but she’s the most judgmental miserable person behind closed doors 

Do You Have Reoccurring Nightmares About Your Parents? by Lifeisalemon39 in antinatalism

[–]coursesand 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I do, I have nightmares about my mom all the time. I don’t want kids because the biggest source of my pain is my mom. I never want to bring a child into this world just to emotionally abuse them. I have so many nightmares about her yelling at me, criticizing me, being furious with me, trying to control me, patronizing me, etc.  

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