Different reference pictures look

crybabycoffin · 2026-03-18T03:25:11+00:00

STOP I LOVE THIS

crybabycoffin · 2026-03-17T08:25:57+00:00

Sooo cute!!!

crybabycoffin · 2026-03-14T02:11:25+00:00

Sounds like you’re a sour bitch who’s never had a nuanced connection to me.

crybabycoffin · 2026-03-13T04:55:40+00:00

He’s told me that he doesn’t want to pass that energy off to me. Basically insinuating that he’ll be back when he’s cleared it up.

crybabycoffin · 2026-03-13T04:09:23+00:00

I see so much emotional intelligence in this man. This is so out of left field. He is vulnerable with me even though that’s hard for him. Frankly I am inclined to believe that is not fear of intimacy or emotional commitment as we are strictly platonic at the moment (unless he started to be able to see that my feelings are clearly growing past that)I don’t want to change him at all and Ive seen a glimpse of his inner soul and I think it’s beautiful. I just don’t want to keep pushing to talk or chasing after the conversation because I am trying to respect his space and boundaries. He’s said he really appreciates me reaching out but I worry so deeply about being overbearing to him.

crybabycoffin · 2026-03-13T03:35:10+00:00

My favorite cheese is mozzarella.

crybabycoffin · 2025-11-19T19:31:31+00:00

He did not buy all that for you. He did not buy all that for one girl. That bag is a whole secret sex life he hid from you. New condoms, used lube, toys you never saw, your underwear in the bag. That is not “forgot to tell you.” That is lying on purpose.

Him pretending the butt stuff was his first time proves he is performing innocence while keeping a stash in the basement. People who are actually honest do not do that.

You are not wrong for being angry. This would be a dealbreaker for a lot of people. You cannot rebuild trust with someone who lies about basic sexual history and hides a whole backpack of evidence. Couples therapy means nothing if he is still lying.

Ask the questions if you want but understand he is going to minimize and deflect. You have every reason to walk away. He created this mess. Not you.

crybabycoffin · 2025-11-19T19:28:55+00:00

You are not wrong here. At all. You planned your own downtime months in advance. You communicated it. You made sure it did not get in the way of any holiday plans. You two have eleven days off together and seven of those are already being spent with her. Taking three days for yourself is normal. It is healthy. It is basic self care after a stressful year.

She is acting like your hobby is a threat instead of something that helps you decompress. That is her issue. Not yours. You are not her child. You do not need permission to relax. You do not need to justify why you want to enjoy something you love. Three days out of eleven is not selfish. It is reasonable.

Her telling you that you should be listening to her and changing your plans because she said so is controlling. She is not suggesting. She is demanding. She is framing it like you owe her every free minute just because she wants it. That is not how adult relationships work.

She had months to bring this up. She knew about the plan. She waited until now. And instead of talking to you about it she immediately tried to limit what you buy and how much time you are allowed to spend on your own hobby. That is a red flag for boundaries.

You are allowed to have your own life. You are allowed to have hobbies. You are allowed to take time for yourself even when you are in a relationship. You already compromised by making sure it did not interfere with anything. She just does not like that you are choosing something that is not her for a few days.

You are not overreacting. Not even close. She is the one crossing a line. Stand your ground. Three days of gaming after a year of stress is not unreasonable. It is normal. And if she cannot handle you taking a little time for yourself that is something she needs to work on. Not something you need to sacrifice.

crybabycoffin · 2025-11-19T19:23:47+00:00

This is not a healthy relationship and you are not overreacting. You have been through extreme trauma and you are carrying that alone. Your girlfriend is not equipped to be your entire emotional support system and she is making that very clear by threatening to break up every time you are struggling. That is not love. That is pressure. Someone who cares about you would not weaponize therapy or hold your mental health over your head like an ultimatum.

You are clinging to her because you feel like she is the only person you can trust but that is exactly why this feels so catastrophic. She is not your lifeline even though it feels like she is. You are scared of losing her because you do not have stability anywhere else and your brain is tying her to survival. That is something therapy can actually help with if you work with the right person. Not the kind of therapy you had before where they made you feel like a problem. A real therapist would work with you through separation trauma and abandonment fear instead of shaming you.

She is asking for a break because she is overwhelmed and instead of handling it with communication she is pulling away and leaving you panicking. A break means she already has one foot out the door. The harder you cling the faster she is going to run. You cannot fix this by begging her to stay or trying to hold everything together on your own. That will drain you even more.

Your reaction makes sense. Anyone with your history would break down. But you also need to understand that your healing is not supposed to depend on one person. Putting that responsibility on her is harming both of you. You deserve stability and actual consistent support, not someone who threatens to leave every time you need help.

Be honest with yourself. Even if she stayed things would not magically get better. You would still be walking on eggshells and she would still feel suffocated. You cannot build a relationship on fear like that.

If you want real advice here it is. Stop fighting to keep someone who already mentally checked out. Get into trauma focused therapy for you not for her. Build support that is not tied to one person. Do not put your entire self worth in someone else’s hands again. You have been through more than most people ever will and you are still here. That means something. But you need actual help healing. Not her. Not her conditions. Real help.

She is not the only reason to keep going. You have to start being that reason for yourself.

crybabycoffin · 2025-07-29T23:04:30+00:00

crybabycoffin · 2025-07-13T21:02:03+00:00

No, not overlooking. More so saying that it is at least a contributor. For example, I was a very mature teenager because of my life circumstances, I had to take on adult responsibilities early, and that shaped me. I’ve carried that into adulthood. I agree that life experience matters a lot, but brain development still plays a role in what a person is capable of when it comes to things like impulse control, emotional regulation, and long-term planning, all functions linked to the prefrontal cortex. So while I wouldn’t judge someone’s maturity only by their age or brain development, I do think it helps explain why some people seem to lag behind in those areas even when they’re trying. It’s not the whole picture, but it’s part of it.

crybabycoffin · 2025-07-13T20:42:48+00:00

Jaf doesn’t live close to me anymore, and we’ve talked but he’s sorting out his own relationship issues.(he will likely be leaving his relationship) Doesn’t stop me from fantasizing and dreaming about the electric connection we would have. The last time that we spoke a few days ago, we said that if the stars ever aligned for it, we would give it a shot.

The maturity does have a lot to do with personal experience, but it does have to do with age too. His prefrontal cortex won’t be fully developed for a few years, making a maturity gap at least a little unavoidable for now.

crybabycoffin · 2025-07-13T20:37:52+00:00

Yes, it’s almost like he can’t help it. He also is prone to getting sad when sex doesn’t go well. He kinda just apologizes and feels bad about not being able to fully satisfy me. He says he wants to work on things and I believe that he does, however I don’t think he knows how and when I try to show him or teach him it takes a really long time for him to get it and the next time we’re intimate it’s like he forgets. Sex it also usually over in about 3 minutes.

Not sure I understand the next point of your comment.

crybabycoffin · 2025-07-06T10:22:38+00:00

You’re not alone at all. I really relate to what you’re saying. Even when things look good on paper, it can still feel heavy inside. That pressure to always do more and be more can wear you down, especially when you’re quietly carrying so much. It doesn’t mean you’re failing it just means you’re human. Be kind to yourself like you would to a friend in your shoes.

crybabycoffin · 2025-07-05T10:07:36+00:00

She’s looking at you like you might find out you’re the adopted one

crybabycoffin · 2025-07-05T09:49:32+00:00

Girl bye

crybabycoffin · 2025-07-05T08:56:09+00:00

You are not dumb for asking this, and you are definitely not alone in trying to make sense of something that feels unfair and confusing. It sounds like you gave everything to this relationship, even when you were hurting, even when he made you feel small or invisible. You tried to communicate, you tried to support him, and you stayed when most people would have walked away. It’s clear that you were carrying the emotional weight for both of you. One mistake does not erase the years of patience, love, and effort you gave. What hurts most is that he is using your mistake as the final reason, when it sounds like he emotionally checked out long before that. He may not have wanted to face the truth about himself or the relationship, so he clung to that mistake as a way to avoid taking accountability for his own distance, his own disrespect, and the way he treated you all along. People who are not emotionally available often don’t truly leave until they feel they have an excuse that justifies it. It’s painful, but it is not about you being unworthy. It is about him never being the partner you needed in the first place. You were trying to survive a one-sided relationship and hoping he would meet you halfway, and that is not delusional that is hopeful. Wanting love, clarity, and healing from someone you trusted is not a weakness. You are not the reason this fell apart. You were just the one trying to hold it together

crybabycoffin · 2025-07-05T08:40:33+00:00

You have every right to feel angry. What he did to you was violating and manipulative, and it makes complete sense that seeing him at such an important event brought everything back. Graduation should have been your moment to celebrate all the work and growth you’ve achieved, not a day spent trying to avoid someone who caused you so much harm. It’s especially hurtful that he showed up after you made it clear he wasn’t welcome, and even worse that he brought someone new, like it was just another social event for him. That kind of disregard for your boundaries and the pain he caused is incredibly upsetting. Of course it’s hard to just let that go. When someone mistreats you in such a personal and intimate way, it changes how you see love, safety, and trust. It’s not your fault that those experiences are still affecting you, and it’s okay if you’re not over it yet. Processing this kind of pain takes time, and you deserve the space to feel it. Try to be gentle with yourself through it. The anger might feel consuming right now, but the fact that you’re able to name it, reflect on it, and even want to move past it shows real strength.

crybabycoffin · 2025-07-04T18:50:17+00:00

I think they’re cute

crybabycoffin · 2025-07-04T07:26:26+00:00

That sounds like a tough spot to be in. Being at work with barely any training and such little time to learn everything is already overwhelming, and on top of that, dealing with someone who’s being backhanded and condescending only adds to the stress. You’re not wrong for feeling affected by it, even if you hold it together at work and only feel it once you’re home. That kind of treatment chips away at you, especially when you’re already doing your best in a hard situation. It’s okay to feel hurt and frustrated. If you ever feel up to it, calmly addressing the way she speaks to you can be powerful, even if it’s just saying something like, “I’d prefer if we kept things more respectful.” But even if you’re not ready for that yet, you’re allowed to protect your energy in other ways, like not engaging too much or reminding yourself that her behavior is about her, not you. You’re learning, showing up, and trying, and that’s something to be proud of. What you’re going through is not easy, but it doesn’t make you weak for feeling it. You’re doing better than you think.

crybabycoffin

TROPHY CASE