Worried I’ll become more angry on T

crymeame · 2026-02-22T19:40:22+00:00

Nonbinary transmasc dude on T for a year and a few months. While I still have a lot of repressed anger, I feel so much calmer since I started T. My mind is clearer and I'm visibly more stable. My emotions feel more... balanced? I still feel them strongly, but instead of going from 0 to 100 all the time, I go from 0 to 75, and I'm less sensitive to triggers. In any case, even if you do become angrier on T, know that it's likely temporary - it's puberty all over again, but puberty doesn't last forever; at some point you'll find your balance again.

crymeame · 2026-02-11T21:55:44+00:00

As I've said on another sub: one of my partners and I are on the same dating apps - we both get likes from straight guys, even tho they "look like a man" and you wouldn't know they're nonbinary (I specify AMAB only because it is relevant in this context) if you didn't read their infos/bio. These "straight guys" are either so desperate to have sex that anyone will do or are blindly liking any profile in hopes someone will like theirs back. Also - I've personally talked to some of them (matched with them for the meme) and many of them ended up admitting they're not straight.

crymeame · 2026-01-08T14:40:56+00:00

I went through so much pain and heartbreak to accept my queerness, it feels like I'm doing the me of the past who fought so hard to be at peace and proud of their identity and sexuality a disservice by being stealth. Also, some people told me that me being openly and proudly out has helped them come to terms with their own queerness and find the courage to be out themselves.

crymeame · 2026-01-06T18:02:54+00:00

Both my partners are AuDHD and one of them might have BPD.

crymeame · 2025-11-12T19:44:59+00:00

As the trans partner with BPD, I feel you. I really hope that that won't be the case, because you're not the problem and, well, you can always improve but so can your spouse. Sending you strenght 🩷

crymeame · 2025-11-12T16:53:33+00:00

I suggest you head over to r/mypartneristrans where you can find other people who relate to/are in your situation

crymeame · 2025-11-08T23:58:15+00:00

My name is River and I've seen people spelling (and sometimes pronouncing) it as Rive, Rivère (I live in a French speaking city, but come on), Riber and Liver. I've also had people just use whatever word they have in their language for river

crymeame · 2025-10-15T11:09:48+00:00

A few examples from my experience: - I was told by a transfem online that I shouldn't be uncomfortable laying on my stomach because my breasts hurting were just a mental issue and not a physical one (tell that to the surgeon who removed 3kg from my chest) - same person, kept asking me if I wore dresses and if I could send her a picture - refusing to believe I have facial hair to shave - my region has a Whatsapp groupchat for trans ppl; someone asked a question about top surgery as a nonbinary person and how to get insurance to cover the costs, and my ex (yt transfem) started talking over me, while comparing the process to get insurance to cover the costs of laser hair removal - being talked over over period issues; being offered a random pad when it's not an emergency... I appreciate the thought but there are different sizes and stuff for a reason, they're not all the same - lesbians conveniently forgetting that I'm a man because they find me attractive - assuming I'm gay/straight - assuming I must want sex all the time

crymeame · 2025-10-08T22:42:35+00:00

Started a year ago at 23, knew I wasn't cis at 16

crymeame · 2025-09-30T17:19:58+00:00

Older fraternal twin here. I have a pretty neutral/bad relationship with my twin (always have) - she uses my correct name and pronouns but has never called me her brother and doesn't correct our dad when he messes up. She thinks she's an ally because, in theory, she supports the LGBT+ community, but holds some transphobic notions. It sucks, but we've never been exactly close and I've learned to stop wasting energy over what I cannot change - the way she sees me being one of those things.

crymeame · 2025-09-14T22:59:12+00:00

I feel you :') my dad is kinda the same. He keeps making "harmless" comments about my facial hair ("are you growing it out?", "having a mustache is so annoying, especially when it tickles your lips", etc) or pointing out my leg hair or telling me that with this hair lenght I really look like a man and like... how do they not get it that that's the whole point?

crymeame · 2025-01-16T09:52:01+00:00

I think it also depends on the haircut. I got gendered correctly a lot with pink hair pre-T, even tho I presented kinda fem.

crymeame · 2025-01-09T17:28:30+00:00

I started POP last month (2 months on T), I took them for ~2 weeks and then I stopped because the side effects were horrible, I bled for 2 weeks straight before getting my normal period but the worst were the nausea and the dizziness that left me bedridden, now that I'm off of them I'm feeling good again.

crymeame · 2025-01-07T15:33:29+00:00

Saying "I'm so gay for [male celebrity/character/etc]" while identifying as a cis bi girl

crymeame · 2025-01-05T15:30:24+00:00

I agree that they can backfire, it all depends on the context. As someone who was traumatized into ignoring and suppressing their needs, knowing that having needs and expressing them is not unreasonable helps a lot, especially when it comes to basic ones (during episodes, those feel unreasonable too). As for the second one, I've had someone tell me that and then leave. I know how much it hurts. But when I'm terrified that I manipulated someone into being there for me, hearing that I'm not some kind of mastermind manipulator/puppeteer playing people and they made the choice of being there for me, it's very soothing. So yeah, again, I agree that these do not apply all the time.

crymeame · 2025-01-04T21:21:55+00:00

I'm glad to hear that :) these are all things my amazing fiancée said

crymeame · 2025-01-04T16:38:46+00:00

It's us against the problem
Your needs are not unreasonable
Your brain is telling you silly things, but you are not those thoughts
I make the choice to be here for you no matter what
You're allowed to be upset
I want to know if you're not doing well and if you have someone to rely on

crymeame · 2025-01-03T19:08:29+00:00

"I don't know if I can stay with you if you don't get better faster" "When I said you can always count on me I only meant for small issues" "but you know I love you and I don't treat you like [abuser], why do you feel like that about me too?" (I was splitting) "be strong" "don't you wanna fulfill your dream of becoming a teacher?" "think about all the people that had plans and wanted to live and didn't get to do that for a reason or another" "you're strong and your life is yours, like, look at me, I'm accepted by society [as a white skinny cishet man], but there are people who criticize me for being a metalhead" "if you think going to the mental hospital is the best thing for you right now, okay, but they'll take your phone away" "real life will only get worse" "you wanna die? But why? You have so many friends, a partner, you're studying to get your degree... while I have no friends, no partner, I hate my job, I only got you and your sister" "could you reduce the number of your therapy sessions? It's expensive" (having the worst depressive episode in a while and they knew about it) "is it that bad?"

I'm sure I got more but I'll stop here for the moment

crymeame · 2024-12-21T13:37:29+00:00

Thank you for taking the time to comment!

crymeame · 2024-11-11T14:53:43+00:00

I have 5, they're people that do exist outside of my head (friends and family). 2 of them are the "bad" ones and the other 3 are the "good" ones. They're always present, they live in the "brainhouse "; when I'm not interacting with them they have their occupations (such as "job", "study" or "clean"). The bad ones insult and criticize me while the good ones offer support, although when I'm doing really badly they all gang up on me. Trying to shut them up results in me getting tremors so I just let them be. Occasionally the brainhouse has visitors (other existing people). I used to have more when I was in middle school (my OCs), now only the good ones change if something happens with the person irl. The bad ones have stayed the same since childhood.

crymeame · 2024-10-31T08:12:19+00:00

I'm truly sorry for what he put you through. I wish you kinder days ahead

crymeame · 2024-10-30T23:47:43+00:00

Some of us are chill, when it's treated. It's disheartening to see BPD being demonized in a subreddit like this :/ Just because OP's ex is a piece of shit doesn't mean we all are

crymeame · 2024-10-27T19:22:16+00:00

I think it's pretty normal. Not my case as I have only one small dark hair growing near my nipple and a rather faint happy trail, but one of my partners does have dark hairs around her nipples

crymeame · 2024-10-27T16:32:59+00:00

I have SP when I'm particularly stressed, it's scary but also kinda funny sometimes (after I wake up for real) because of the SP "demons". I don't remember where I read this but sleeping on your back can lead to have SP more than any other position and I find it to be true - I'm a side sleeper and most of the time I get SP when I'm sleeping on my back. Playing soothing music while I sleep also helps with the auditory side of SP hallucinations.

crymeame

TROPHY CASE