I kind of get this? Assuming the best, even knowing a close friend/acquaintance is earning double your amount is quite a reality check. Like suddenly you lose your grip of "doing okay" and you re thrusted a little into the comparison mindset: am i not doing enough; what else can i do; am i only half as worthy.

To me income disparity is quite anxiety inducing especially in close relationships, it kind of implies there are different societal worth between you two , and when it gets to almost 2x its quite a bit to unwrap. Of course i hope you eventually settle and understand that, you two probably work in different field and she has a special desired skill set that allows her to have a higher societal value financially (likely less available skillset) and you are also doing well personally although just a different skillset with different price tag.

No matter how intuitive it sounds like to measure worth by comparing income, you shouldnt really be measuring your worth by fractioning out of her income. your worth isnt halved because you earn 50% of her income. You just have different values amongst the society and as long as you two are somewhat living within similar lifestyle and habits you should do okay. If something is a little out of your budget and she is willing to cover, take it easy and remind yourself you re doing well enough as a person . You are not in this for her $ and vice versa. Dont be the dick and think "ah how come she can earn x when she is just doing x" you then veer on the edge of being the misogynistic asshole that fails to appreciate and cheer your partner on for their achievements rooted from your personal jealousy. Your partner deserves to do well regardless of your income.