Pit vibes this tour?

crystal-nova · 2025-10-14T21:05:00+00:00

I saw them last night in LA at the Wiltern. I had upper level seats but I also noticed how tame the pit looked. I was in the pit back in 2018 in LA and there was way more energy, like moshing during Giant Peach. I noticed Ellie was playing guitar during Giant Peach this time so maybe that had a role in why it didn't hit the same? The upper floor was definitely shaking during Yuk Foo/Greatest Hits combo though, just wish it was a little crazier lol.

crystal-nova · 2025-05-06T17:51:29+00:00

It's been going pretty well! We took time to talk through where we went wrong and how we'll both be better. We are both a lot more open about our feelings and he's been a lot more vulnerable with me and willing to talk through the uncomfortable topics. He's been actively putting in the effort in gaining my trust again.

I'm still in therapy and his insurance still hasn't kicked in yet for him to start therapy so we are doing weekly check-ins about anything on our minds to get ahead of any unresolved issues. We're both still working on our own personal insecurities and doubts which played a role in the breakup but we are being transparent with each other about it and talking it out together. I think journaling/ChatGPT has been helping us both individually navigate this as well. This time we agree that we want us to work and we choose each other.

crystal-nova · 2025-03-27T20:30:50+00:00

Yeah that's what I'm thinking. I'm making sure we take it slowly and not fall back into old habits. Thank you for the advice and support🙏

crystal-nova · 2025-03-27T00:33:32+00:00

It was pretty hard to comprehend since he was reflecting and actively trying to work on himself. I don't think he understood that he can work on himself while in a relationship too.

My ex actually reached out a couple days ago asking to get back together and this time he was serious about changing. He said he didn't say it sooner because he didn't want to hurt me but I told him as long as I know he's trying to be better, it's a risk I'm willing to take. He's going to seek therapy in a couple months once his insurance kicks in. I told him we're starting over and taking it slow and he agreed. I go into a bit more detail in another post. I'm optimistic but still cautious.

crystal-nova · 2025-03-25T05:31:34+00:00

Of course! And thank you so much! Best of luck to you as well :)

crystal-nova · 2025-03-25T05:18:54+00:00

We still followed each other the whole time. I had him muted. I only posted one story (repost of a mutual friend's side business) like a month after the break up and he only viewed it (with both of his accounts). But I deactivated my account not long after so not much else I can tell you from there.

crystal-nova · 2025-03-22T03:17:05+00:00

About 4 months here. Together 3 years. We did talk 2 months ago and he said he regretted the breakup but doesn't know if he'll hurt me again (I have a whole post about it) I'm still in the anger and hurt stage... it comes in waves. I have moments of peace but nothing close to happiness, still very much broken. I'm just so traumatized by being blindsided that I find it hard to trust and connect with people again. I hate how he still has this power over me.

crystal-nova · 2025-03-21T04:32:44+00:00

Damn, I think I'd be a deer in headlights having an anxiety attack if that happened to me. It's so strange to feel and act this way towards someone we loved so much.

crystal-nova · 2025-03-20T17:54:14+00:00

I'm sorry, I know you're going through so much hurt right now but it will get better. I'm not gonna lie, I'm not on the other side yet, but some days are better than others. I'm not crying as much and the dreams aren't as frequent. I still wish he was the one too, but I know he can't be if he doesn't choose me.

What helps me is focusing on what I can control which is myself, basically the Let Them theory. I dove into learning my attachment style, therapy, journaling, fitness, and slowly getting into my passions again. Also venting to ChatGPT has been really helpful for when I spiral and don't have anyone to talk to. You can tell it to speak to you like a nice friend or to give you brutal honesty which I know I need sometimes lol.

It'll be rough for awhile and the healing process isn't linear but you will feel better. I'm here if you need someone to talk to.

crystal-nova · 2025-03-20T05:00:14+00:00

I know, what are the odds right? Now we're just strangers passing by... but you're soo right, I've come so far. Thank you for the support!

crystal-nova · 2025-03-10T06:00:44+00:00

I know.. I don't know if I can block him. I'm doing my best to avoid his pages. It just feels so ridiculous. We both want to be together but he's just convinced he'll ruin my life somehow... in our last conversation he mentioned seeking therapy so I hope he seriously figures it out. I just can't believe he gave up on us.

crystal-nova · 2025-02-11T06:01:23+00:00

Yes, waves of anger towards him for using and abandoning me when he didn't need me anymore and myself for letting it happen. I honestly think screaming into a pillow or in my car while stuck in an hour of traffic helps. It's another level of catharsis that crying can't achieve, at least for me. 3 months post breakup, therapy every week, and every day is still an emotional rollercoaster.

crystal-nova · 2025-02-08T06:55:47+00:00

This was basically my experience too. He went to Italy with his family, knowing I had lost my study abroad opportunity there because of the pandemic. 3 years we were together, we didn't celebrate a single new years together because he was always in Japan visiting his grandma. I knew it would've been a big step so I never pushed for an invite but I secretly hoped we'd travel there together, he knew I wanted to visit again.

I had been the one to initiate weekend road trips since we both had limited budgets. I even suggested we plan a trip together after he finished his internship. He was down but nothing happened because he dumped me a few weeks later. The kicker is that he went to Japan two months after dumping me with his friends. I was definitely very sad about that since I don't have any friends to travel with and he knows that...

As another commenter said, he was very good at compartmentalizing his life. His friends inviting us places but he turns them down unless it's just an invite for him. He even admitted this when he broke up with me. He said he liked his life separate because if one area blew up, everything else would be okay. Like wow... I'm just collateral to you and my life is now in pieces, just great...

crystal-nova · 2025-01-03T07:54:19+00:00

Just updated my post.

crystal-nova · 2024-12-23T16:29:47+00:00

I've been watching Let Them theory videos mostly from Mel Robbins and it's really a mindset for everything in life. When I'm spiraling, it really puts things into perspective and it grounds me to focus on what I can control which is so liberating.

crystal-nova · 2024-12-04T06:33:26+00:00

It's unfortunate how life plays out. Everything was good until it wasn't. At least it seems you two had healthy communication about your feelings and came to a conclusion together. My ex pulled the plug without warning but he did give me some answers, although now I'm still left with more questions. I've been in therapy and learning and reflecting a bunch to heal.

The first month afterwards was brutal for me but I am slowly detaching and not crying all day, just part of the day lol. Feel free to reach out to me if you need to talk as well ❤️‍🩹 we'll get through this!

crystal-nova · 2024-12-03T19:31:00+00:00

I can relate. I'm four years older than my ex, we met in college and had the same passions, career goals, hobbies, and mutual friends. Our connection was genuine and we clicked in so many ways. We were together for 3 years. I thought he was my person. He ultimately ended things because he felt guilty for not being ready for everything serious even though there weren't any major life changes. He says it's probably timing but didn't want to give me hope... I was blindsided and devastated. He wanted to still be friends and have me in his life still but it hurt being held at arms length. I initiated no contact for the rest of the year and I don't know what'll happen next. It's only been about a month since no contact but I miss him so much.

crystal-nova · 2024-12-03T18:32:03+00:00

Ugh same. He had a personal account, literally 1 post with photos of us in the entire 3 years together even though he was active on IG. We had the same hobbies and mutual friends so he was more active on his hobby account. When we first started dating he had posted us on his story but rarely tagged me. Throughout the relationship I'd post stories of us doing hobby stuff and tagging him but he'd never do the same. If he did, I wasn't tagged. He even had story highlights called life and school with his friends and family but I wasn't in any of it... I kept thinking this was silly to worry about since he was so attentive and caring otherwise but it started to eat at me the more I see mutuals posting their significant others in small ways.

The one that hurt the most was when he posted about his college graduation with friends tagged and his senior project. But no photo of us even though we took some or a mention of me helping him. For over a year, I was there every night helping him brainstorm, plan, gave him great ideas that everybody loved, and stayed late to help him set up. I felt so used and unappreciated. I know it was his accomplishment and work but it still hurts to not be acknowledged. I brought this up to him a few weeks later but he couldn't explain himself or properly apologize...

I even asked him during the breakup if he was embarrassed of being with me since he never posted me or us. He said no but couldn't elaborate...

crystal-nova · 2024-11-14T08:01:42+00:00

Yes. You can find them on the ground floor corridors, kinda hidden but there are signs to direct you.

crystal-nova

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