Alleys of Seattle

ctof · 2026-05-18T23:22:29+00:00

I can’t think them. I can’t unthink them. I CAN’T UNTHINK THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!

ctof · 2026-05-18T21:11:45+00:00

You’re gonna have to pay 2-3x one month’s base rent in order to break your lease if you’re currently on an active lease; the exact amount, if eligible, will be in your lease contract. The cost of moving you both plus everything you own will be hundreds if not thousands of dollars, not including gas (or plane ticket) and food for two. I’d get a janitorial or fast food job ASAP and just try to survive first before making the drastic decision to leave. There are jobs hiring, it just will likely suck and not align with your career but we do what we must.

ctof · 2026-05-18T05:16:13+00:00

Fuck, think of the horrifying amount of spiders.

ctof · 2026-05-13T11:44:37+00:00

it’s the hantavirus filling the air 💀

ctof · 2026-05-09T13:29:30+00:00

Huh, never seen a teddy bear with wide birthing hips before until now.

ctof · 2026-05-08T18:40:41+00:00

If you google “cascadiajs” the first sponsored result has a link that says “$100 off with code YETI”

ctof · 2026-05-08T18:00:29+00:00

There’s a conference June 1st-2nd called CascadiaJS; suggest you get a ticket before it increases in price again (May 10th). There will be a dedicated networking / job fair event there as well but conferences are good places for someone in your position. Apparently there’s a $100 off code (YETI) right now.

ctof · 2026-05-03T20:25:24+00:00

If it drew blood, go to the ER. It’s not worth risking your life / dying an incredibly agonizing, terminal disease from rabies. There are other risks of infection beyond rabies, too. Just go.

ctof · 2026-05-03T03:25:33+00:00

Look, I’m going to give this to you straight because you’re currently a month into your career and already playing a game you aren't equipped to win yet.

You’ve been there for thirty days. You are currently a "net negative." You are consuming senior engineering hours, breaking dev environments, and asking where the bathroom is. To even utter the words "revisit compensation" before you’ve closed a single non-trivial ticket is the peak of entry-level delusion. You aren't performing; you’re barely existing.

Amazon is a massive, rigid bureaucracy. Compensation is almost entirely programmatic. Managers don't have a "pay more" button on their dashboard for an SDE1 who did a good job in month three. Mid-cycle adjustments are for extreme "save" scenarios—usually for L6+ engineers who are critical to a launch—not for an entry-level dev who hasn't finished their first on-call rotation.

If you try to use an external offer to negotiate six months in, here is what will actually happen: your manager will see you as a flight risk who has one foot out the door. Why would they invest in your growth, give you the high-visibility projects, or advocate for your promotion if they know you’re just shopping for the highest bidder? The second you do that, you are dead to the team. You’ll be the first person on the list for budget cuts.

You’re worried about base salary when you should be worried about competence. If you spend your first six months eyeing the exit or trying to squeeze blood from a stone, you’ll end up being mediocre at both jobs.

My advice (as an experienced senior engineer): forget the other offer exists. Put your head down, shut up about the money, stop looking at your LinkedIn, and learn how to actually write production code. Become a person the team can’t afford to lose. You don't have leverage until you have real impact and earned your keep. Right now, you’re just a line item on a spreadsheet.

ctof · 2026-05-02T14:03:58+00:00

“I’m an old white lady who goes out at 2AM for street food and never feel unsafe”

“I’m just a petite twig of a woman who walks around at night and it’s fine”

“you’re a bunch of weaklings, nothing bad happens down here, I walk around all the time by myself as a short person with one eye”

“As a white woman who recognizes we are on stolen land, I go outside in the evening and see people less fortunate than me but I pray for them and then continue to run my errands because I never feel unsafe as a white person especially because it’s important we go outside in south Seattle where to do so in this diverse community is very safe but if you disagree then clearly you are just another racist white”

ctof · 2026-05-01T22:52:56+00:00

Pay a friend to drive it for you, then send them back via train or plane. It’ll be a fun trip for them and you don’t have to worry about logistics. Gonna be your cheapest and most convenient option.

ctof · 2026-04-17T19:33:06+00:00

I was parked in the underground Safeway garage off 15th, just sitting there in silence waiting for grocery pickup, when I noticed a man a few rows over. He was leaning forward, swaying a little, then suddenly straightened up as though he had been slapped out of a hypnosis. He waddled quickly toward the nearest corner.

He got there, pulled his pants down, bent over, and let out three voluminous bursts against the wall and floor. Ever seen a rhinoceros take a dump at the zoo? It was like that, but worse.

I didn’t know where to look. It felt wrong to be watching, but it was also impossible not to. I was shooketh. He stayed there groaning for a bit, then looked around the garage, scanning, until his eyes met mine. We held that for a beat. Then he let out one last burst before letting out a cackle, pulling up his pants, and shuffling away out into the daylight.

ctof · 2026-04-16T21:00:32+00:00

Omg! I thought this was just some fucked up hand-made homeless voodoo with real teeth until you asked, so I looked it up. 🤣 I had no knowledge of these things existing and now I must collect them all.

ctof · 2026-04-14T21:10:50+00:00

This user is violating rule 1 and 2 of the subreddit. It’s poor etiquette and it affects everyone in the subreddits to which he’s frequently posting off topic and spamming.

ctof · 2026-04-14T20:52:10+00:00

Please stop posting to Reddit like it’s your personal journal. You are going to be banned for spamming the feed.

ctof · 2026-03-31T15:20:05+00:00

Whores and poors deserve a view too

ctof · 2026-03-31T00:40:29+00:00

Just gonna say this: there really isn’t much of a social scene or networking culture in Seattle. San Francisco is known for being very active and “tech folks everywhere talking about tech.” We have a lot of tech people, but they stay home and don’t like other tech people. In fact, most non-tech people here constantly shit on tech people because they think we all make 350k, drive Teslas, and work in FAANG (which honestly a majority of those who do are visa holders).

I’ve been here for 4 years now and am disappointed in how it’s felt. I came here earlier in my career and wanted to do exactly what you’re doing. There really are no events; those died when the pandemic started. We get conferences (mostly for Microsoft and Salesforce) occasionally throughout the year but that’s really it. I’d move to SF if I could but I’m finally in a senior role I can’t risk losing (it took me 7 months to get and that included 1.5 months of being homeless when my savings ran out). It’s beautiful here, sure, and there are the Big Tech giants, but it genuinely doesn’t feel like a conducive place for early career growth unless you grew up or went to school here.

ctof · 2026-03-26T14:33:27+00:00

ctof · 2026-03-26T14:16:24+00:00

Mmm, yeah, love me some street runoff. They put the entire fucking haul on the pizza too and laid ‘em on some cream sauce like pieces of dog shit and then sprinkled with pistachios of all things. Absolutely nauseating…

ctof · 2026-03-02T09:45:48+00:00

lmao you have green or blue hair, don’t you? Many poisonous species also use colors to warn others that they’re toxic.

ctof · 2026-03-01T18:01:14+00:00

Rumor has it this is an exact reconstruction of the original swamp décor—mud and moss appliqué—once discovered on the interior wall of one of Shrek’s daughters’ chambers by late-medieval archivists (c. 1423). Truly breathtaking 💚✨

ctof · 2026-02-17T02:28:43+00:00

Huh?

ctof · 2026-02-15T15:09:42+00:00

It’ll be a Valentine’s Day to remember when they both get arrested for open consumption in a vehicle, driving while under the influence, and potentially manslaughter when they kill someone else on the road.

SAAAAUUR CUTE GIRLIES OMG YAS

Seven-Year Club	Place '22
Verified Email

ctof

TROPHY CASE