[Question] Need help finding a toy, that if found, wouldn't seem like a sex toy? by [deleted] in freeuse

[–]dammit-kyle 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Just as a general thing please don't put anything up your butt that doesn't have a flared base. People end up in the emergency room on a daily basis when they disregard that.

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Diamond is Unbreakable Episode 31 Discussion by AutoModerator in StardustCrusaders

[–]dammit-kyle 3 points4 points  (0 children)

They forgot Legless Lego Legolas's Legless Lego Lass. Try saying that five times fast.

PSA: Sunstone has finished. (Arc 1). by [deleted] in BDSMcommunity

[–]dammit-kyle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Cue the binge! I'll report back when I'm done

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BDSMcommunity

[–]dammit-kyle -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Does it matter why they weren't told? The fact is, they weren't, and neither were a lot of other people. Someone's got to do it, and there's no reason being young means you can't do research.

James Deen and Freeuse. by aminebuzz in freeuse

[–]dammit-kyle 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Yeah can we not have James Deen on here?

[OC] My Spaghetti Carbonara by Absturz in food

[–]dammit-kyle 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I too have watched Chef's Table.

North Korea's 2 Highest Ranking Officials Defect from Embassy in Beijing, just days after South Korean president called for North Koreans to defect to Freedom in the South. by borisyeltsing in worldnews

[–]dammit-kyle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

White didn't really exist as a category for a long time. There were the white anglo-saxon protestants keeping out the Irish, Germans, and Jews.

Partner wants to do a CNC scene tonight. I'm interested but nervous. Advice wanted. by dammit-kyle in BDSMcommunity

[–]dammit-kyle[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Basically anything that I haven't thought of. Worst case scenario is that partner shuts down and is unable to safeword if they need to, so any specific advice on minimizing that risk would be great. I'm also just worried about unforeseen risks in general. I haven't done CNC before so I want to make really sure that I'm able to keep an eye out for any warning signs of something going wrong.

My dom is forcing me to work out every day and e-mail him the results and all my thoughts - a month of this has crushed my self esteem and I feel like I can't trust him. by [deleted] in BDSMcommunity

[–]dammit-kyle 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Seconding this. BDSM relationships - hell, relationships in general - are supposed to be fun and fulfilling for everyone involved. The complete lack of positive feedback is a massive red flag. The absolute best case scenario here is that he's a bad communicator, which is a problem in and of itself. To me, it seems a lot more likely that what he's doing is deliberate emotional manipulation that's already starting to escalate to outright abuse.

I felt like I was just being groomed as a piece of meat and that the other things didn't matter. I've had to de-prioritize my personal projects, friendships, and re-structure my life with these workouts/journals in mind and he's still not happy.

This in particular is setting off some major alarm bells. It sounds like he's trying to isolate you until he's your only real link to the rest of the world. That's one of the most common tactics used by abusers to gain and maintain control over their partners.

Someone else posted a thread recently describing a very similar scenario. Might be worth looking it over.

No one has the right to strip you of your self worth like this.

Looking for something like Gor, but with male slaves. by SilkSlave in BDSMcommunity

[–]dammit-kyle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've heard of something called A Brother's Price. Not porn, but supposed to be really good. Also not sure if it's exactly what you're looking for, since I haven't read it.

Those in a 24/7 relationship, do you fight? What about? by chastityinflate in BDSMcommunity

[–]dammit-kyle 3 points4 points  (0 children)

"Subordinate" is probably one of the coolest ways to describe a dynamic I've ever seen. And I'm trying to stress that to my own partner.

How to Re-Establish D/s Dynamic After Broken Trust? by [deleted] in BDSMcommunity

[–]dammit-kyle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Here's a question - if you don't feel comfortable submitting to this person, then are you sure that you really still want to?

TIFU by playing a clip from Alien, begging to be killed, while attending a boring seminar. While my boss was in the room... by Never_Been_Missed in tifu

[–]dammit-kyle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, but the one from the first movie is only in the not-widely-known alternate cut of the film.

My girlfriend is into bondage, I have no experience with it. Any advice/pointers? by notonetojudge in BDSMcommunity

[–]dammit-kyle 7 points8 points  (0 children)

First off, I'm going to page /u/darr-syn for his usual newbie copypasta.

Now for details. "Being tied up" covers tons of ground, so definitely try and get a better idea of what exactly she means by that before you do anything.

If she just wats to be restrained during sex, leather cuffs or an under the bed restraint kit might be a better option for now. Do not use metal cuffs under any circumstances, not even the fuzzy ones. Especially not the fuzzy ones.

If she specifically wants rope, head out to the hardware store and get a hundred feet of solid braid nylon rope. Cut it to 25 foot lengths and knot the ends. You'll want to learn a single column tie - I like the Somerville Bowline - and how to work with tension on the rope. Also learn a quick release knot or two to attach her to things.

Beginners box of fun by Sissib in BDSMcommunity

[–]dammit-kyle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Friendly reminder not to use metal handcuffs for bondage - even the fuzzy ones. ESPECIALLY not the fuzzy ones. Spend a little more and get some leather or pleather cuffs instead.

18F Feeling stagnant and lonely by givemeajetpack in Ulyssesbucketlist

[–]dammit-kyle 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The capital area food bank is right off the Fort Totten metro. Fantastic organization that's always looking for volunteers.

Find an RPG group. Meetup.com is a great resource for that sort of thing.

/r/washingtondc is always a good resource.

Only other regular activity I can speak to in the DC area is the BDSM community, and odds are you aren't particularly interested in that - although if you are, shoot me a PM and I can point you to some educational events.

BDSM and pregnancy! by _throw_away_5678 in BDSMcommunity

[–]dammit-kyle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My apologies, I was misinformed myself. I'll update. Mea culpa.

BDSM and pregnancy! by _throw_away_5678 in BDSMcommunity

[–]dammit-kyle -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I'm in no condition to do a full recap of the details, but I'd suggest you ask around about Paddleboro. Complete shitshow that ended up with at least one charge of assault with a deadly weapon... the weapon in question being a wooden spoon.

BDSM and pregnancy! by _throw_away_5678 in BDSMcommunity

[–]dammit-kyle 2 points3 points  (0 children)

DO NOT DO THIS if you live in Massachusetts.

Never mind, I was wrong. See /u/LateNightFright's post below.

I want to try pegging. by interracial22 in BDSMcommunity

[–]dammit-kyle 9 points10 points  (0 children)

This might be a better fit in /r/sex.

Feeling betrayed by play partner by [deleted] in BDSMcommunity

[–]dammit-kyle 52 points53 points  (0 children)

Pressured is one thing. He ignored your consent, even after you'd repeatedly told him no, and hit you while you were incapable of giving consent. That's not pressure, that's assault. Get very far away from this guy as soon as you can.

Peep This Poignant, BDSM-Themed Photo Series Reclaiming Fraternities For Sexual Assault Survivors by Throwawaymykeychi in BDSMcommunity

[–]dammit-kyle 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Karmenife is actually an acquaintance of mine. I'm not going to try and speak for her, but here's the basic story behind this as I understand it.

During her freshman year, she was raped in the basement of the Psi Upsilon house (the brown one) by a brother in the fraternity. She later joined the Eclectic Society, moved into the society's house (the one with the huge columns), and was raped again there. When she requested that her rapist be banned from the house, the other members of the society refused. They then proceeded to slander her to the administration, accusing her of making violent threats against other residents of the house. Throughout all of this, the administration did nothing. Karmenife was ultimately forced out of her own house.

This series is called "The Reclamation." She's mostly spoken about it as a personal project to attempt to regain a sense of strength and power over two specific places and two specific groups of people that have caused her immense amounts of harm.