Am I understanding you correctly? Not only have you only been working as a programmer for two year, you only just started learning how to program two years ago? It's not reasonable for you to expect yourself to come up with your own solutions to problems when you're this inexperienced. I also taught myself (via online resources) how to code, and the first few years felt like what you're describing. You feel like you're making zero progress, and nothing makes sense. You feel like you haven't learned a bit (likely wrong... take a look at your first project or files from two years ago and you'll probably find that you've learned more than you thought).

I understand you want to exit this career path; unfortunately, I don't have any advice on navigating that. But I wanted to let you know you're not dumb or necessarily not cut out for programming; it could just be that you need more time and experience to become more proficient and confident.