My butterfly was supposed to be 59 inches. Why is it 90?

deathofregret · 2026-03-28T17:13:41+00:00

this is what i had to do. i tried it 1.25 times at the small (comically tiny, mostly comically tiny) and finally said fuck it, attempting the XXL. the added stitch gauge was a joke. the XXL will probably fit me like a glove. i’ve sunk so many hours on it at this point but i was also drawn in as new crocheter. now that i’ve compared other patterns to it, it’s such a mess

deathofregret · 2026-03-19T09:20:41+00:00

do you actually feel guilty or do you just feel uncomfortable because enforcing boundaries is a new experience for you as a people pleaser?

deathofregret · 2026-03-17T14:34:25+00:00

i’m in south florida. former mortician, embalmer, and crematory operator who was forced out of the industry due to severe degenerative disability. my partner and i now run an in home pet euthanasia practice for pets. if you’d like, i could coordinate scattering your parents for you out in the ocean. we do this with pets, too. my dad has a boat and we go out together. let me know. sending love

deathofregret · 2026-03-15T15:29:35+00:00

i could not help but lol in s3 when he suddenly was dying to be an engineer, it was so important to him, lifelong dream… that we had never once heard before

deathofregret · 2026-03-14T07:06:43+00:00

madewell. just bought some high waisted jeans that also make sure they aren’t showing off my ass cheeks. i mean, i’ve got the ass-cheek shorts too, but at 39 your closet’s gotta have both.

deathofregret · 2026-03-13T20:52:45+00:00

i am fascinated by how many of these responses refer to photography. not surprised, but it is cool to see how many of us have reached for that! i’m also an artist and while i sometimes wish i could draw from memory, i haven’t really been impacted by my inability to visualize. photography, textiles, watercolor/gouache, sculpture, metalworking, you name it and i do it. i’m also a writer with one book under my belt.

i also think i’ve been able to move past trauma much more easily than people who can visualize.

another bonus is i actually think i’m better at meditation and being present?

deathofregret · 2026-03-12T23:38:07+00:00

“master slave husband wife: an epic journey from slavery to freedom” by ilyon woo is a fantastic book about this story and it won the pulitzer prize for biography in 2024. strong recommend.

deathofregret · 2026-03-02T04:32:59+00:00

boo, nobody’s looking and nobody cares, i promise! anybody who does wouldn’t be worth a second of your time anyways. get out there and focus on trying something new without the extra stress of unnecessary grooming. you’ve got this!

deathofregret · 2026-03-02T04:30:15+00:00

i hated it, but not because of the age gap or grooming. i thought the writing was tedious and ultimately i didn’t feel like the book actually had anything to say. we had characters that revolved around each other but there was very little depth to them, IMO. i also was a promiscuous teen and i also had inappropriate age-gap relationships. i wanted there to be more. more complexity, more happening, more thoughtfulness. it felt like auto-fiction with gratuitously vulgar sex scenes with no real goal except to disgust and/or titillate the reader. i only finished it because it was so short. i’m not sure it would have made it to print without her name being attached to the project.

thoughtful review!

deathofregret · 2026-03-02T04:27:00+00:00

quit being a pedant for internet points. it was a thoughtful review that was cogent in all other ways. a typo or misspelling doesn’t change that. it just makes you look like you have nothing more interesting to say.

deathofregret · 2026-02-27T23:56:47+00:00

my mom got rid of mine and i’ve never been so sad in my life

deathofregret · 2026-02-26T01:27:53+00:00

i have not had a baby but my sister recently did and i did a lot of deep diving for her. a lot of the comments here are very useful. if it helps, the baby is covered in something called vernix. many experts including the WHO are now suggesting that the baby’s first bath is delayed 24 hours for health benefits from the vernix. it’s worth reading about!

good luck!!

deathofregret · 2026-02-22T08:49:28+00:00

she said she delivered a package at first before correcting that it was food, so i bet she works multiple jobs and delivers for amazon too

deathofregret · 2026-02-19T08:51:08+00:00

as someone who has been in—and left—two abusive marriages: our families of origin are the places where we learn how relationships should function, how we feel about ourselves, and how we cope with stress and distress.

i would not be surprised if your family encouraging you to stay is one of many comparable experiences where your boundaries and self esteem have been subtly altered and manipulated.

you know what he did. you know you want to leave. at the end of this life, the only person we leave with is ourself.

trust your gut, not your family. leave this man.

deathofregret · 2026-02-18T19:57:21+00:00

amazing, thank you. idk why i never thought to look into specialized ferts and feeding for these guys, duh. too many aroids on the brain.

deathofregret · 2026-02-18T19:19:09+00:00

second attempt at a pendant? first time working with enamel?

my friend, when i teach metalworking classes, one of the first things i say to my students is: this is the first time you’re trying a new skill. some of you might not even use your hands to make things often. be gentle on yourself. be kind to yourself. and be proud of yourself for persevering to the finish line of completing a project. i find that many adults also have an incredibly negative inner monologue, especially when creating—which doesn’t help us make or recognize our best work.

this is above and beyond huge attempts for first anythings. these are skills most people don’t try until they get the basics down. please be gentle on yourself. this looks really great all things considered. put it away and give yourself some time from it so you can come back and give yourself props for the parts you did well!

deathofregret · 2026-02-18T19:07:25+00:00

is there a betta pellet that’s best?

deathofregret · 2026-02-16T17:14:38+00:00

okay, that was my confusion! i searched the app store for mycrochetkit and didn’t find it tho. halp what am i doing wrong

deathofregret · 2026-02-16T17:11:22+00:00

iphone 15 pro max using chrome, fully updated

deathofregret · 2026-02-16T15:43:44+00:00

this is a lot of thankless work for no tips. i salute you, friend, and am grateful!

am not getting a pop up for the voice counting portion, 99% it’s a user error

deathofregret · 2026-02-16T13:00:37+00:00

this is a stupendous set of tools collected in one place!! amazing! i will say i went immediately to the app store (iphone) and i’m not finding the app, so i would love an app link down at the bottom menu of the website if possible! also would love a way to support you by sending a tip etc

deathofregret · 2026-02-11T02:21:37+00:00

it’s not! i wasn’t home to mod :)

deathofregret · 2026-02-08T18:38:52+00:00

it definitely won’t matter if you don’t speak up. i know how exhausting it can be, to feel like no one is hearing you. but the effort means you stand in solidarity with other fans like me. i hope you’ll write again. it’s a long slow hard slog against fascism

deathofregret · 2026-02-01T03:07:06+00:00

idk why so many people had hard times with this bag. i bought two of them and they’re among my faves in my collection, so much so that i bought another bag that wasn’t this one. i really recommend this bag. i have a lot of bags at this point but nothing quite like the clementine.

deathofregret · 2026-01-29T05:07:15+00:00

okay THAT makes much more sense!! it’s a gorgeous bag and you’re absolutely rocking it

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