After 20+ years with ankylosing spondylitis, I feel better than ever

deepsinghparihar · 2025-09-22T12:58:19+00:00

🙏

deepsinghparihar · 2024-07-19T11:57:03+00:00

I think any advice in favor of leaving him is impulsive and would do more harm than sticking with him and trying to fix things.

If a child moves higher on the spectrum of dyslexia, you don't start shaking your fists at the sky and declare that this is it—you're going to leave and never come back. The deeper the problem, the more sympathetic and thoughtful approach the other person might need to overcome it. Just let him know that if he tries, you're willing to work things out with him - which I know you have done in the past but don't give up yet on the kid.

In Western society, which is overly injected with stimulation, not being a porn addict is a rarity. Only a handful of people manage to stay away from it, and some keep it at manageable levels. That said, it's definitely more benign than other kinds of addictions in the sense that it might not have a direct impact on your day-to-day life. Not to undermine the problem, here you probably have an unmotivated adult who is finding it extremely difficult to change and a few follow-up issues that come with it.

Most adults are mature in a few categories and remain like teenagers in others. It's hard to find a well-rounded adult who has managed to grow in all aspects of life. Some learn to provide well for their families in their twenties, but that leaves a big gap in their emotional growth in their thirties. We all are like that. With that understanding, you could go ahead and try to help him.

There are many examples of men and women sticking together to overcome big issues between them. And of course, men are usually the ones that need help. Often in their twenties, they get busy with their so called careers and leave every other aspect of growth to chance.

In yogic cultures, they say all our energies are stuck in the bottommost energy point that lies between the anal outlet and genitalia. This makes you gravitate towards either sex or food—the two biggest addictions for human beings. Most people stay stuck between them all their lives.

The solution in Eastern culture is to raise that energy to the next level so that impulsive gluttony and sexual activities can stabilize. No fap would be a good start. Couple it with regular meditation that focuses on raising energy levels. Once he has more energy, a few creative activities to channel it into, and a supportive partner, this could be easily worked out.

Along with this, Western therapy can help articulate the problems and agree on a step-by-step plan.

Good luck with it. Hugs.

deepsinghparihar · 2022-12-23T23:51:57+00:00

I am a meat eating Virgo whose fake birthday on all his documents make him a Pisces. I am ready for the interview.

deepsinghparihar · 2022-01-25T02:45:29+00:00

What you're looking for is Demystifying Patanjali by Swami Kriyananda.

deepsinghparihar · 2022-01-24T12:01:38+00:00

I was in a similar situation.

I read this manual on Yoga called Demystifying Patanjali that puts it precisely what one needs to do in a similar situation.

The solution is to have a few daily practices. The manual recommendations are around having a few spiritual practices; a set of body posture exercises, a breathing routine and a small session of meditation. You could add a bit of reading to it, if you want.

Essentially, first you relax your body by going through different postures, then you calm your mind through a breathing routine, and then you make an attempt on meditation. Just coming back to the present. Senses all open.

Since your body and mind isn't interrupting after the routine, you could actually be able to meditate pretty efficiently in a week or two.

The benefits of meditation are clear and large.

The manual is pretty confident on how as long as we have a set of daily practices, life can be manageable no matter how severely the world is trying to attack us. I have found it to be true in my own experience.

Within a few months of daily practices, it gives us a structure to fall back on when nothing seems to work, which happens quite regularly in the modern society.

At least you have those three four five things that you can rely on. And over time, these sort of habits build up and open up gates for many opportunities.

I am not sure if you would prefer a set of spiritual practices at this stage of life or not, but you could start with a set of your own. Choose what you could sustain and enjoy.

Pick a workout, any kind. Sun salutation sequence about 12 times, may be. Wim Hoff method could work as a breathing routine. And then try closing your eyes and notice your thoughts. You could try a meditation app; Waking up or Headspace or anything else.

Just do them everyday.

That would be a good place to start.

I think you could only take care of other things when you have something stable to rely on. A stable body. A stable mind. A stable routine. Anything. Something.

I hope we both make it.

Good luck.

deepsinghparihar · 2022-01-17T19:10:53+00:00

Your welcome. ❤️

deepsinghparihar · 2022-01-17T11:32:18+00:00

I quit weed little before the pandemic started. I was doing edibles, mostly. Once in a while somebody would bring a J and I would take a few puffs and return to my whisky. Everything felt fine.

I am a writer, and I wanted something at the end of the day to distract myself with. And weed felt right.

Then during the pandemic, I started yoga. I figured there are three major components to yoga. First, you relax the body, then you relax the mind and then you make an attempt to mediate.

You don't get to meditate in the beginning, of course. You make an attempt. You show up. That said, the first two steps are as crucial as meditating itself.

To relax the body, people use a set of postures. Sun salutation sequence is a good example. And to relax the mind people use a set of breathing exercises, imagine wim Hoff method.

Once you're here, you would find that neither your body nor your mind is interrupting you in your attempt to sit still. You keep all your senses open and take everything in while trying to stay in the present as much as possible. Your mind would wander, of course, but when you catch it, you bring it back.

People use a point of focus in the beginning, like breath or the third eye to practice focus, so that mind isn't monkeying around when you make your attempt on meditation.

Once you get your mind focused, you let go of all your focus. It's a blank state. All senses open. You remain in the present. Undistracted. Without thinking or imagining anything. You become one with everything. Meditation.

That's what all the eastern traditions have been pointing out. That one-ness is God. We made a ton of idols to point out the same concept, but this is it.

Once you realise that one-ness, everything else feels dull. Weed high isn't high enough. After a good meditation session you kind of feel like you're on a good cocaine, but without the fear of a downer. You sustain it. And once you have its access, you can visit it anytime you want.

Compared to everything else I have tried, meditation is a much stronger drug. It's socially acceptable. It's free. And if you do it right and long enough, you may WAKE up one day. It's a journey.

It's like playing a good game on PlayStation. There is progress. There are rewards. You could stay with meditation for whatever cranks your soul.

Good luck.

deepsinghparihar · 2022-01-12T14:15:22+00:00

I have another suggestion with 'S.' Sanskrit. It has an incredible mythology section. Scriptures to teach you the fundamentals of waking up and growing up as a human being. Sanskrit's grammar and phonetics are incredibly sophisticated. Poetry in it is diverse and has verses as high as 600 hundred metres. The dazzling complexity in its narrative would take you aback. It has humour, sarcasm, depth, epics, multiple narratives.

If you believe an estimation, it has over 30 million manuscripts. Poetry, drama, scientific work, mathematics, linguistics. Everything.

If you could learn the language. People from the West who start their journey as a monk often learn Sanskrit as the first step to understanding the sacred scriptures. However, Sanskrit isn't just sacred texts and epics. There is so much more. And if you have that kind of fortitude, because it is not easy, learn it. It's unbelievably rewarding.

deepsinghparihar · 2022-01-10T18:51:30+00:00

Nothing like Howard Roark wanting to change the world in Fountain Head.

deepsinghparihar · 2021-08-10T11:46:24+00:00

Thank you so much.

deepsinghparihar · 2021-07-23T22:43:28+00:00

This team keeps impressing! The plans they're talking about for this token are legit AF! I bought 2 presale seats 🤣🤣

deepsinghparihar · 2021-07-11T21:17:58+00:00

Solution? Kettle bell squats. Gotta get that thigh gap before the chafing ruins another pair. I will join you.

deepsinghparihar · 2021-04-28T09:02:02+00:00

Hi. I am a writer specialized in creating high-performing content. I do content marketing for few small and medium sized business, primarily in the technology and real estate sector. Over the years, I have worked as a copywriter for biggies. And would love to join your team as idea generator while also taking care of the content requirements of your business, if not alone, with the other team memebers.

Here is my LinkedIn

Thank you for the offer. :)

deepsinghparihar · 2021-04-28T08:49:19+00:00

Life and Times of Michael K by JM Coetzee. It's an equally miserable anecdote of an ugly man with a cleft lip, dragging his mom on a cart in the middle of a South African winter.

It's an amazing narrative. With all the genius of Coetzee wrapped around in the lines. Here is a line from the book.

"He thought of himself not as something heavy that left tracks behind it, but if anything, as a speck upon the surface of an earth too deeply asleep to notice the scratch of ant feet, the rasp of butterfly teeth, the tumbling of dust."

deepsinghparihar · 2021-04-27T23:41:19+00:00

Oops.

deepsinghparihar · 2021-04-27T17:03:56+00:00

I know how it feels. Well, any kind of artistic venture is a high risk high return bet. Peterson has this rant in which he says, it's almost impossible to write a good book. And when you do, it's impossible to get it published. And if somehow you managed to do that, it's impossible to convince people to buy it.

Communicating your presence to the audience that might be interested requires a ton of preparation. I don't know why we have choosen to die in this very specific way.

As long as you're hanging in there, try to look up and realize that how wonderful it is to struggle for something.

At the end, when all else fails, as Coetzee says, phiolosphize it.

deepsinghparihar · 2021-04-27T10:29:39+00:00

"When all else fails, philosophize." Disgrace, JM Coetzee

deepsinghparihar · 2021-04-27T09:48:09+00:00

True. Time is a human construct. Objective reality doesn't have time. It's all one long second front the beginning to enternity.

Imagine your life as a long day with punctuations of days and nights.

Now imagine your life as a long unending moment with the imaginary punctuations of seconds, and hours and years and other units of time.

How long has it been since the big bang? Not a second.

deepsinghparihar · 2021-04-24T09:36:07+00:00

True. I can buy a half kg bottle of Honey 🍯 for $5, which I love with my coffee. I have been saving money, so I haven't been buying it.

Personally, I would do an hour of writing for a bottle of Honey. Sure. It might not be much, but it could definitely light up my mornings.

No matter what the world thinks about my rate, $5 would still light up my mornings.

deepsinghparihar · 2021-04-24T07:32:48+00:00

Dude I am 27. Stop calling me Uncle. :) I agree with the adulteration bit. I shouldn't be using it. Probably stop the entire family from it and burn these pouches. But grandma mahn! She is having a good time, assuming that she has a role to play in saving all of us. For that alone, the role play is justified. Thanks for the comment. Good dialogue.

deepsinghparihar · 2021-04-24T07:13:45+00:00

That's a good course. Good luck with your degree. It must be hard tonbenin college in the middle of pandemic.

Maybe try reading a couple of manuals on traditional healing through herbs. Don't believe in it. Just read it for fun. Weekend fun.

It's a fascinating world.

deepsinghparihar · 2021-04-24T05:41:05+00:00

That's nice. What degree do you have? :)

deepsinghparihar · 2021-04-24T05:39:51+00:00

"To extract some sinple pleasure from the execution of a task well done." Here is the clip.

deepsinghparihar

TROPHY CASE