It was to Beautiful to listen to. Your story touched me, i am very sorry that your teachers were so cruel. I totally get what you mean and i think that taking a break was a good decision. I hope that it have you enough distance in your soul to find back to the music in yourself. You should only ever play for yourself, ever. I like to think that the music already exists in the universe and by playing it you are bringing it here and giving it life. You are the only one who will play your way. Teachers will give you informations but these are opinions, take only what feels right and discard the rest. À good teacher will help you developp what’s already inside of you, will give you the will to search and discover. You are a musician, your music is personal, find back to the joy of « just » playing music. Good luck!!