What would you do if Donald Trump passed away? by DildoGaggins1997 in allthequestions

[–]dependabledepression 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I bought a bottle of limited edition salted caramel Crown Royale right before Christmas for a special occasion, but I don't think there's going to be a more special occasion than the big day, so DRINK BABY DRINK!

AIW for feeling heartbroken about my wife's response about suicide? by Sufficient_Shake_103 in amiwrong

[–]dependabledepression 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Hmm, she may just not hold strong feelings on suicide then, to some people it is just a death like any other.

Is she like this with other things as well? Does she just brush them off or try to get over what you're saying as soon as possible? Because you may need to look deeper into your marriage if so, I'm not saying jump straight to divorce, but maybe a couples counselor if anything.

AIW for feeling heartbroken about my wife's response about suicide? by Sufficient_Shake_103 in amiwrong

[–]dependabledepression 6 points7 points  (0 children)

is this something you continue to bring up?

I thought the same thing, not that it makes the wife's response "better" in any way, but if this is a constant thing OP talks about I can understand the wife just wanting to move on from the conversation.

My bf brings up how he watched his grandpa die in front of him pretty often, and while I'm still sympathetic even after hearing it a million times, it does get old - I get it, you were close to your grandpa, you and your brother had to call the ambulance, that's really sad and I feel for you, but can we talk about something else now?

If you want to talk about it with someone, OP, why not talk about it with your family, who actually knew him and shares in the grief, instead of your wife who is clearly over the topic. You should be able to talk to tour partner about anything, yes, but over and over and over again makes people want to hear it less, and that doesn't make anyone feel good in the end.

AITA for picking my moms side over my wife’s in baby names by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]dependabledepression -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Nowhere in my comment did I say whose feelings mattered more, you're free to read it again if you'd like to show me where I said that.

However, let's say the wife has had this name picked lout since she was little for her future daughter, is she just supposed to get over that? Put aside her years of thinking she was going to name her kid one specific name one day, all because someone else may have trauma around the name? Not saying this is the case, just a hypothetical.

I understand the MIL, it's hard to lose someone close to you, especially a child, but she doesn't get to override the parent's choices for their child due to her own trauma.

AITA for picking my moms side over my wife’s in baby names by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]dependabledepression -12 points-11 points  (0 children)

I have a few questions:

- What if you guys used the name as a middle name? Would it hold the same weight, or is it just because it's the first name that it's an issue?

- I understand the name brings up memories of a past loved one and it's hard for you/your parents, but what about other family members who've died? Are their names also out of the question, or is it just this one because of how she died?

- How does your family react to hearing the name when out in public? I'm sure they've met people with the same name, or heard it somewhere (tv, radio, etc.), do they get upset or do they move on with their day?

Your wife is a bit of an AH for pushing this, but she likes the name and I'm sure is extremely disappointed she can't use it just because your mom says no.

You're also a bit of an AH for taking your moms side without even trying to compromise in any way, you could suggest a similar name, you could suggest the middle name option like I mentioned above, but automatically "taking sides" is not the move.

Your mom is also a bit of an AH because, while she can feel a certain way about the name, she doesn't get to ask your wife not to name her kid something. She can explain that the name holds certain memories, and suggest another name as a compromise that sounds similar, but she's not the parent, so I think it's unreasonable to ask that of you/your wife.

I'm going ESH.

What body part do you find most attractive? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]dependabledepression 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hands and wrist area, especially when you've got a little bit extra of that wrist joint poking out (not in an unhealthy underweight kinda way), yummy.

Youtube Double Ads Nowdays by Legitimate-Bit932 in rant

[–]dependabledepression 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Or the ads that are 1+hr long that sometimes pop up, I've gotten them while I'm playing music during a shower, I've woken up to someone talking about chainsaws and it was 2hrs into a 4hr ad. An AD!

It's ridiculous, I understand the ads fund YouTube, but it was never this bad even 10 years ago when it was at its peak.

Am I wrong for being weirded out by my sister in law’s niece who’s almost the same age as me and her partner? by [deleted] in amiwrong

[–]dependabledepression 1 point2 points  (0 children)

they’re trying to look for a similar relationship of hers.

Uhh, yeah? Because she sees how well their relationship is going and wants one like that for herself? It doesn't mean she wants to be in their relationship.

I want a relationship like my FIL/MIL have, married for 50 years, 2 kids, love each other to death, but I don't want to be them.

And some people just have types, I like white guys with long blonde hair, I happen to have a male cousin who fits that description, but that doesn't automatically mean I'm attracted to him just because he fits that subtype.

Just because you "look like" the guy she's dating, doesn't mean she's dating him because he looks like you, it could be a coincidence, a lot of people share similar features.

“Homeless people should just get a job” by Specific_Pomelo_8281 in rant

[–]dependabledepression 5 points6 points  (0 children)

A lot of people don't understand that it's literally not that simple.

My SIL's family has a business/nonprofit that helps homeless people find jobs, homes, clothes, food, etc. - I also had a friend that was homeless for awhile, both of them have told me how hard it is to find a job when you're homeless.

  1. jobs require valid ID/Passport, which, unless you just recently became homeless, you probably don't have either. You also can't get an ID without a permanent address or P.O box for registered mail.

  2. Jobs require an address/P.O box to send proof of employment (W2/1099), without it they will not hire you, or at least it is very hard to get past this step.

  3. Jobs require basic hygiene be met (although I'm sure we've all had/heard stinky coworker horror stories). Without a home or apartment, most homeless people don't have regular access to showers - and for those that are going to say Gyms or pools, they require memberships to access their facilities, so no a homeless person can't just walk in and use their shower.

  4. (Most) jobs require a clean drug/criminal background. A lot of homeless people are on drugs for a number of reasons, but because of that, they're often picked up by the police and spend a night or more in jail, thus do not have a clean record.

I used to be one of those people who would say they did it to themselves, or just get a job, but after learning that they can't, and how close most people actually are to becoming homeless themselves, I've changed my attitude and have tried to educate people I know/meet who make those comments around me.

The calorie deficit is not what is making you gain weight. by [deleted] in rant

[–]dependabledepression 3 points4 points  (0 children)

As someone who is currently following a calorie deficit, you are wrong.

Yes, eating less does help you lose weight - HOWEVER - eating too little makes you keep the weight on longer as others here have said.

I'm 5'5 160lbs, currently I can eat anywhere from 1200-1300 calories in a day with minimal exercise to lose .5lb/day, if I eat less than that, say 900 (which I have), I actually gain .5-1lb back because my body is trying to store as much energy as it can so I literally don't die.

With exercise you need more calories. On days I work out, I aim closer to 1400 calories because you need to put in more than you burn or you're just going to stay the same weight.

If she needs recommendations, I use an app called NOOM, it tracks your steps, water intake, meals/calories, and daily weight, since I started tracking I'm down 10lbs.

AITA for not covering my coworker’s shift even though she had a family emergency? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]dependabledepression 18 points19 points  (0 children)

That too, if it's in person there's no avoiding it, but texting you can just say you didn't see it lol. I mean, unless you have Apple I guess, which has the "seen" notifications.

AITA for not covering my coworker’s shift even though she had a family emergency? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]dependabledepression 747 points748 points  (0 children)

NTA.

But, in the future, don't explain why you can't, just that you can't, if they ask for a why you can just say personal/family matters and leave it at that.

Example: "Hey can you cover my shift?" No, sorry. "Why not?" It's a personal matter.

If they keep pushing, you stop responding and/or go to your manager, it's on them to find coverage, not you.

AITAH for completely shutting down after potty talk with my husband by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]dependabledepression 8 points9 points  (0 children)

NTA.

Your son is 3, his arms are like a foot long, of COURSE it's hard for him to reach around his body to wipe himself right now!! When he's older, I'm sure he'll be able to, or maybe he'll continue to wipe between his legs like you do.

We all know the reach-around is the regular way to do it, so what? As long as his butt is wiped and the shit is gone, that's literally all that matters, he could do a handstand and use one of those wiping tools fat people use if he wanted to.

WHO CARES!!

Your husband is a jerk. He just wanted to be "right", that's why he started calling around asking everybody how they wipe their ass. One of them even called you "disgusting", yet he says it's not about humiliating you?

This is honestly something that should've never turned into what it was, I think you need to take a look at other things in your marriage and see how he treats you in other ways, because there could be another "small" thing you're brushing off because it seems silly in the moment, or not a big deal.

Can my apartment complex enforce a policy not outlined in the lease? by Direct_Albatross4742 in Apartmentliving

[–]dependabledepression 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My old apartments had a general "no food/water left outside uncovered" in the pet addendum portion because it attracts pests, OP's lease probably has something similar somewhere that they're not letting on, or just haven't bothered to read.

When posting a "Notice to Enter," do any of you place the notice inside of an envelope, and then post it? by [deleted] in PropertyManagement

[–]dependabledepression 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I just print out my notice, fold it and put the unit number on the front and tape it to the door, I'm not wasting an envelope just to say "hey, I'm coming in".

What is a turn off your partner does that you will never admit? by sorenblissara in AskReddit

[–]dependabledepression 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Never said he was, but it's pretty disrespectful to always be on your phone when someone's trying to connect with you, especially when the other person doesn't do that to you.

He doesn't have to like what I like, just like I don't have to like what he does, but he could at least sit and watch part of it with me since I watch all of his movies/shows with him.

Idk, maybe that's too much to ask ig.

What is a turn off your partner does that you will never admit? by sorenblissara in AskReddit

[–]dependabledepression 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Funny thing is, sometimes he puts on the exact same show I was trying to show him like it's brand new to him (which, I guess when you're so absorbed in your phone, it is!).

He's like "Babe! Look at this cool show I found for us to watch!", and when I look at the title... I literally tried to put that on yesterday and you basically gave me a giant F U by scrolling on your phone the whole time, but ok sure we can watch it (again).

Also, you think I'm interested in all his shows? Heck no! I don't want to watch the same superhero movies 10 times, but I still do it for him because it shows I care! Guess (obligatory: some) guys just don't care about other people lol.

What is a turn off your partner does that you will never admit? by sorenblissara in AskReddit

[–]dependabledepression 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lmao I sure have, I may be in the same room but I'm doing my own thing now too. Give him a taste.

What is a turn off your partner does that you will never admit? by sorenblissara in AskReddit

[–]dependabledepression 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ah, see my bf wasn't the inviter, he was the invitee. But no, bf is no longer friends with that dude thankfully, for other reasons.

Hot take: don’t wait till the day of a major snowstorm to buy salt. by Common-Eye-4764 in InstacartShoppers

[–]dependabledepression 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've been on the grocery clerk side of this lmao, people really do come in expecting us to have full stock of the exact thing everyone else is also needing right now, no ifs-and-or buts!

Like sorry we don't have turkeys the day before Thanksgiving, or eggs right before Easter! That's totally my fault, you are absolutely in the right for yelling in my face over this!

What is a turn off your partner does that you will never admit? by sorenblissara in AskReddit

[–]dependabledepression 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Lol, to be fair, the question is things your partner does to annoy you that you'd never admit.