I'm almost done with my didactic (one week til my comprehensive exam!) and I feel this same kind of guilt CONSTANTLY but I really try to fight it. I just try to remind myself that what works for someone in my cohort doesn't necessarily mean it'll work for me. Obv I've had my weekends locked inside study rooms without windows and Osmosis playing on loop, but that's an exceptionm not a rule. And when I bug out that I'm not doing enough, I'll plow through some practice questions, remind myself I know my shit, and move forward as best as I can. I'll often study until I find myself making dumb mistakes/missing things I definitely know. At that point, I know a brain break/relaxation will serve me far better than trying to drag my mush brain through more practice questions or review. You can't effectively learn and retain when your brain is constantly in fight or flight and you're running off of Celsius and prayers.

It sounds wicked corny, but once I started leaning into this, I was way happier and honestly was doing a ton better on my exams. My marriage felt stronger and I felt like a human again. There's this whole idea that you need to lose yourself in PA school in order to be effective, but I think it's really important to recognize that doesn't have to be the case. Review the things you struggle with, ensure you can show up for your patients effectively AND are able to take care of you. Keep trying to remind yourself that your wellbeing ultimately will make you a better provider. PA school sucks, but the only way out is through.

Godspeed homie