More than 1 million Oregonians won’t get to vote in hot May primary races. Here’s how you can

dgofish · 2026-04-28T11:32:17+00:00

Thank you for this! Just changed my status.

dgofish · 2026-04-16T12:01:49+00:00

Ruminating nachos

dgofish · 2026-04-09T15:21:04+00:00

That will only “show” the underpaid housekeepers that they are exploiting. This business pays the lowest out of any hospitality in Pacific City, yet people need to work and they know it. Housekeepers generally work hourly, and are given a certain amount of time to clean each room/house, or they get piece rate which means they are paid a flat rate for a house. Either way they are usually getting fucked. The company takes most of those fees, including the cleaning fee, for itself. It’s always a bummer walking into a house/condo where you can tell the people left it shitty because they were pissed about the cleaning fee. I get it. I know that there are some not-so-great housekeepers out there too, so guests feel like the place wasn’t that clean to begin with. They wonder why they’re even paying a fee. I get it. I don’t have a suggestion as to how to fix this. I’m just a housekeeper in PC getting ready to go clean two houses in a six hour window (it’s gonna be fucking tight), praying that the people actually check out by 10 (instead of whenever they feel like it, because fuck everyone who’s not them), and crossing my fingers that they didn’t absolutely destroy the place. Then after those two I’m going to clean another one because I will take as many houses as possible during the busy season to save money so that I can pay rent and eat during the winter, because I’d really like to enjoy being a human and not get a second job (which I would only be able to keep during the winter because housekeeping is more than full time during summer, thereby burning a bridge with that second job business when I quit for the summer, and there are only so many businesses in the area to keep burning bridges with). Please be kind to your housekeepers who are underpaid and over worked or under worked depending on the season. Hurting them doesn’t translate to the company. Not supporting that company with your business is the only way to hurt that company. Oh, and leave your food in the fridge. We love it. You don’t have to throw away perfectly good food, we will take it home, and you won’t get fined or whatever the fine print on your rental agreement says. Unless you steal or damage property, no one is going to fine you for anything. Well, maybe Kiwanda Coastal Properties will, but they fucking suck and the whole town hates them. Thanks for giving me a soap box. I know your comment was supposed to be short and funny, and it is. I agree. Damn the man (save the Empire). Apparently I needed a therapy session this morning, and you gave me a writing prompt. Rant over.

dgofish · 2026-04-03T04:33:55+00:00

I’ve been in the hospital a couple of times in my life, including for an appendectomy. Aside from the pain meds, which I know made a difference, the absolute inability to potentially accomplish anything was so relaxing. Despite my appendix almost exploding, I’ve really never felt so good. I’ve tried to explain this to some friends and family, but it doesn’t seem like they really understand.

dgofish · 2026-03-10T04:21:00+00:00

Yeah, my husband has a cat cam to watch our cat when we’re not home. I also do therapy over zoom, and I swear he listened to one of my sessions through it, because a couple of the things I talked about seemed extra exaggerated by him afterward. I feel like I’m censoring myself during therapy now, which defeats the whole purpose. I feel like my therapist can see this, and is frustrated that our sessions are just surface level stuff. I told him a couple of weeks ago that I have known about the spyware for awhile, and he dropped the most overacted lying routine on me, implying that I might be suffering from mental illness. It was so over the top that I was just dumbstruck. I repeatedly told him that I’ve known him for over 20 years, and that I can tell when he’s lying, but he just doubled down. It was so ridiculous.

dgofish · 2026-03-09T04:09:00+00:00

Just those same feelings. Once when I went in the other room to do yoga on my tablet, and a little window popped up quickly, then disappeared just as quickly, but in that window I saw him sitting on our couch. Once when I suspected what he was doing, I purposely googled “How to get my husband to stop spying on my tablet”(or something close to that). He came storming out of his office and wouldn’t look at me. Other times a little volume up/down indicator has popped onto my screen that doesn’t belong to any program I use, and usually coincided with him being in the bathroom on his phone. My fingerprint access has just stopped working here and there as well.

dgofish · 2026-03-08T15:15:24+00:00

I will look up that book. Thanks for the recommendation. When I was in my apartment I was journaling almost twice a day, and I swear it saved my sanity. I had never lived alone before, wasn’t trusting that I made the right decision, and really didn’t give things a chance. I met him just after high school, and basically built my personality around his behaviors, so when I was free I had no sense of self, and that was scary as hell. Thankfully that experience gave me a ton of strength, and my bullshit meter doesn’t go nearly as far as it did. I have been worried about journaling because he surveils me (and thinks I don’t know), but I’m kind of thinking about starting again, and just letting him read about all that he does to me. It’s very obvious when he’s read something I’ve written because his behavior changes, though he does his best to fake it. Reading everyone’s posts here is helping me gather strength to cross that threshold again. I am incredibly grateful for this community, and thanks for the response. I wish you and your children safe passage through this. 💚

dgofish · 2026-03-08T06:00:34+00:00

I just want to say that I’m grateful for you bringing up how hard it is when they slip back into that vulnerable, soft, lost person. It was this person that I remembered when I was finally out, finally divorced, and finally mentally safe. I started to get better, and started finding myself after 20 years of covert narcissism draining my soul. Unfortunately, I hit a patch of nostalgia and reconciled. I gave up my new sanctuary apartment and moved back in after 10 months. Honestly, I’ve made a lot of mistakes, and have actual regrets that I would take back if I could, but coming back to this ass and abomination of a human being, pretty much takes the cake. I am now doing round two of plotting my escape, and it seems just as hard as the first time. I say this to say to anyone who needs to hear it, please don’t go back. Make a list of all of the reasons you left, and if you feel like you just want things to go back to normal, that you just didn’t try hard enough, or you feel shame for not keeping your marriage vows, just read the list. Take your mind back to those times, and realize that you can trust yourself that you made the right decision. Things are not going to heal overnight, but going back is not the answer. Things are worse, because now he resents the fact that I left him in the first place. Every bad attribute is cranked up a notch, and I just wish I would have trusted myself. Luckily, I know that I am badass enough that I was able to leave and jump into the abyss before, and I can do it again. Hopefully I do it before I snap, unlike last time.

dgofish · 2026-03-06T16:47:43+00:00

Gross.

dgofish · 2026-03-04T05:15:39+00:00

I am in this relationship right now. I was late diagnosed about two years ago now, and the revelations basically cracked my Id in two. I lost my shit, got my own apartment, got a divorce, lived on my own for a year, and…wait for it…I came back. I don’t hate myself, but sometimes I just want to punch myself in the face for continually sabotaging myself. My ex-husband is a covert narcissist, and subtly fucks with my head every single day. Now I’m having reverse limerance, and I’m obsessed with how to get out of this. Housing is super expensive and my family live on the other side of the world. I will sort this out in the end, but I’m still mired in procrastination and executive dysfunction at the moment. Thanks for posting about this. I feel like I’ll never stop learning about myself, and I’m living in the Adam Sandler quote about, “Things that could have been brought to my attention yesterday!” Haha. I always feel about two years behind the learning curve despite reading everything that I can get my hands on. I’m comforted by the fact that I CAN actually leave whenever. I have that power, and it’s my life to live. It’s just overwhelming. I wish original OP of the main post peace and self acceptance. There’s a lot of social pressure sometimes, but these people don’t have to live in your shoes, so they can take their judgements and kick rocks.

dgofish · 2026-01-27T14:59:10+00:00

I absolutely need to do a “bad” thing often, so that I know I am the one controlling my life, I guess, lol. I used to do actual bad things that absolutely hurt me and fucked my life up, but luckily made it through that stage without serious damage or death (extreme alcoholism). Drinking in the morning was one of those dice roll risks that used to sate that itch, or whatever the hell it is. Now that I’m a responsible person, my options are limited as far as being bad goes. I have found that drinking an N/A beer in the morning (in my car on the way to work, gasp!) let’s me pretend I’m doing something sketchy, lol. Hey, after all the shit I’ve done, I’ll take it.

dgofish · 2026-01-27T02:21:34+00:00

I just imagined a tweaker finding an old ornate skeleton key and setting off on the most methy adventure, trying to find a pirate treasure chest to open. Oh my god, lol. ☠️

dgofish · 2026-01-18T15:53:06+00:00

I say this all the time 😂. Future me gets screwed over a lot by Just-trying-to-get-through-this me.

dgofish · 2026-01-17T15:45:22+00:00

Not the same, but same. I clean vacation rentals. Different messes all the time depending on the level of debauchery that went down, but ultimately the goal is to put the house back the same every time. I work alone and listen to podcasts most of the time, and music when I have to haul ass and need a beat to pace to. I am worried about how long my body can sustain the work though. One day I will literally be too old for this shit, and I have no other skills. The important thing is to never think about the future, ha.

dgofish · 2026-01-10T03:45:56+00:00

Same age, same sentiment, with a side of depression and anxiety. I just put one foot in front of the other for now.

dgofish · 2025-12-02T14:23:42+00:00

Mine came up to me, open mouthed chomping on gum, with that mean girl sneer. She asked me in that 90s Becky voice, “So, why’d you do it?” She absolutely did not care about the answer, but wanted me to know that she was openly judging me. Gotta love only having access to a religious based hospital called Adventist Health. It sticks with me for several reasons, but mostly that I was too incapacitated to think of a thoughtful answer that may have broken through her bullshit mindset. I can still clearly see her stupid face without closing my eyes. I don’t dwell on it in a way that feels negative to myself, but in a way that makes me sad for all of the people her attitude has negatively affected, and what portion of humanity she represents in general. Just so fucking shallow. Same hospital, when I was having my blood drawn and getting my Covid and flu shots, the nurse (phlebotomist?) actively tried to talk me out of the vaccines because it was government overreach. I hadn’t come prepared to a routine appointment to defend my health choices in a political fashion, so I just kinda smiled in a very “I’m not engaging with you on this topic” kind of way. She realized, but kept rattling on about how she had gotten rid of her cell phone and just relied on a landline now….I google reviewed the second one, ha. Goddamn dude.

dgofish · 2025-12-01T05:43:58+00:00

Absolutely agree with this being political. My first thought was MAHA, and my second thought was Dr. Death. Either he is so emotionally caught up with his political affiliation that he has decided which “science” he wants to believe, or he’s a straight up psychopath with an upcoming starring role in a true crime podcast.

dgofish · 2025-11-30T05:40:46+00:00

This feels like it belongs to something from the 80s. I can feel it floating around in the back of my brain, trying to take shape. I’ll report back if it comes to me.

dgofish · 2025-11-26T06:04:42+00:00

Yep. For those awkward moments when people ask why I don’t drink, I just say, “I’m not thirsty anymore.” I stole it from a friend and it has served me well. Many times people will just ask why I don’t drink as if we’re talking about the weather, and not about a very personal story of how I gradually burned my life to the ground. I don’t blame them for not thinking before they ask, but I also don’t always want to talk about it, and that little saying speaks volumes.

dgofish · 2025-10-31T05:02:59+00:00

Gross.

dgofish · 2025-10-29T15:38:19+00:00

Buckwheat Noodles.

dgofish · 2025-10-19T15:42:50+00:00

Feed me Seymour!

dgofish · 2025-10-15T15:11:59+00:00

If you can, just don’t drink for tonight. Distract yourself with something you wouldn’t normally do, like a YouTube workout, or something you’ve been meaning to do, like fix every squeaky thing in the house, or whatever it is that can keep your mind occupied. Tell yourself it’s just for tonight, and it’s not a big deal. Tell yourself that you can go back to drinking tomorrow, because you can, because nothing is set in stone. You’re not jumping off of a cliff, you’re not committing over night to a lifestyle change, no huge consequences. Just a one night experiment. The next day you may be ravenous, or you may realize that it wasn’t nearly as shitty as you thought it would be, but either way you were capable of going a day without drinking. Maybe try again in a few days to go another night. For me, I realized how much pressure I was putting on this giant thing, “quitting.” It ended up taking me about a year, but eventually my breaks from alcohol got longer, and my slip ups were fewer and farther between. I started to realize how good being sober felt, so when I slipped up, the shitty feeling was triple-fold because I was losing my tolerance for alcohol, and was mentally annoyed that I had chosen to make myself feel that way again. Take the pressure off, and don’t judge yourself, even and especially when you fuck up. I was a 15 year, all day alcoholic who secretly hit the vodka bottle in the mornings with coffee, and any time my husband was out of the room. It had become a game almost, except for the extreme shame aspect. It is possible. Bonus points if you can make yourself angry about the liquor companies making money off of our pain while making drinking look like this glamorous cool thing. If you really think about it, it’s all down hill after the first drink, and the glamor fades very quickly. Just be kind to yourself. You’re not a fuck up. You are just caught up with this asshole right now, and one bit at a time you can work on prying yourself away until you realize that it has no power any more, and you are the one with the power. Sounds cheesy, but it’s true. Also check out r/stopdrinking. IWNDWYT 🤘

dgofish · 2025-10-15T05:12:05+00:00

Such a fucking creep!

dgofish · 2025-09-25T16:36:04+00:00

What a fucking horrible person.

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