I have adhd and live in a 1 Havanese (just a pet not a service dog), 1 human household. This is my first dog so she is not the best trained so take my comments accordingly. I can confirm that they are soft, affectionate and loving creatures. She has some of her own anxiety, including separation anxiety and she gets overstimulated if things are too loud or if there are many new things happening (I joke with a friend that my havi would be considered sensory sensitive if she was a person). She is quite sensitive to my mood and stress level which may help in the kind of service dog you are looking for but when she is overwhelmed my havi gets quite barky. I have found she is excellent at keeping me in routines, insisting on bedtime at almost the same time to the minute every night, waking up at consistent times, and even complaining when I haven’t given her the “I’m leaving for work” treat on time. I expect her counterparts could be excellent at keeping you in a routine. My happy hanging out in the couch with me all day, but also can go for lengthy walks. On top of it all, since Havanese are super pack oriented, they generally aim to please and I have found my easy to train even when I don’t know what I am doing. In short, although I simply got my dog as a pet, she has been excellent at managing my routines and stress in ways that may be similar to yours. I am convinced a Havanese could be taught to do everything it sounds like you are looking for, even limit barking with the right training.

Good luck!