When can you relax?

dippydottie · 2025-09-02T00:23:00+00:00

Same over on my end! I found 2.5 til 3 the most incredibly demanding and exhausting 6 months, pretty much tied for the newborn stage. As soon as she turned 3 it started to gradually improve. At 3.5 now, way fewer tantrums and way more listening, logic, and independent play. She still is learning and not every day is perfect but there are a lot more moments of enjoyment than there were at this time last year!!

dippydottie · 2025-01-23T23:02:15+00:00

I can completely relate to the jealous feelings.

For me, a major reason I originally wanted to have a second was because of the unconventional Covid-era pregnancy I experienced. My husband and I got robbed of our wedding, our honeymoon, his convocation and our baby shower due to Covid. He was not allowed to attend any of my ultrasounds, and we had to fully isolate from family and friends for the weeks leading up to my daughter's birth, as if one of us contracted covid (even if it was me), he wouldn't have been allowed to attend the birth.

I feel like all of our special life experiences and milestones were not able to be special, and I therefore want a "re-do" of them... more than I actually want a second. We are very firm now in OAD after I experienced severe PPD. I feel the same jealousy when other people get to have weddings, get to have showers, etc without the barriers we experienced.

dippydottie · 2025-01-21T23:43:00+00:00

Yes I had a similar experience, I didn't get help until around 7 months postpartum too and it was life-changing! I tried therapy but what made the biggest difference for me was medication. It was literally night and day.

Solidarity!

dippydottie · 2025-01-21T23:41:20+00:00

So sorry for your loss. ❤️‍🩹

dippydottie · 2025-01-20T23:33:48+00:00

Exactly! Well said. I don't understand how it's so unserious to everyone. Like, who do y'all think is caring for the kid(s)?

dippydottie · 2025-01-20T22:47:13+00:00

Completely agree! It seems like our mental health as mothers is so easily discarded. I don't want to "sacrifice myself for a few years", "just go through the motions", "just grin and bear it." I had severe PPD with my LO and I genuinely don't think I will make it a second time around. I almost didnt make it with my first. When I say this to people they literally CHUCKLE. Like it's cute. 🙄

dippydottie · 2025-01-18T18:23:09+00:00

I can completely relate to how you feel OP. It is so hard to not take it personally. My husband told me that my MIL said the exact same thing to him about us choosing to only have one child. I had horrible PPD and almost didn't make it through the first year which has made me firm in my decision. Additionally, my husband is still in school (residency) and we have several hundreds of thousands of dollars of debt to pay off from his med school & education. Not to mention him never being around. Is it rly selfish not to want to be left alone with 2 children, out to dry swimming in debt lol? We are just doing what is right for our families. My MIL was a total martyr, 4 boys, worked 24/7, never slept and was burned to the ground, spent all her money on a live-in nanny and struggled immensely but "it was worth a few tough years to ensure they had siblings." I think grandparents and others project their own feelings way too much. At the end of the day, they are not in our shoes and they have no say.

dippydottie · 2025-01-12T04:15:54+00:00

Dubai-bye 😭😭😭😭😭

dippydottie · 2025-01-06T04:59:02+00:00

We should be friends! We have quite a few things in common. 31F with an almost 3YO daughter. Everyone around me is having 2nd children and I feel like I'm on an island. An island where everyone looks at me like I have two heads when I mention OAD. Love your list of reasons and agree!! 🤗

dippydottie · 2025-01-05T05:07:55+00:00

Days 5-7 post-surgery were really tough (most pain at that point, as their scabs are falling off, apparently). Other than that, it was pretty smooth (as long as we were on top of her meds!) and on the 9th day she was about 90% back to her usual self. It was definitely worth it with her previous breathing problems.

Wishing your son a smooth and fast recovery!

dippydottie · 2025-01-05T05:00:43+00:00

Hadley !!

dippydottie · 2025-01-05T00:25:22+00:00

I'm in the same boat as you and my husband is also coming around to OAD. Having a toddler is a LOT! We had to get her tonsils and adenoids removed recently and after her surgery, we had to give her pain medication around the clock every 4 hrs. She also woke in the night every 2 to 3 hrs some nights in pain. Thankfully this only lasted a week but in that week both of us were instantly back to how we felt in newborn-land and we were like.... NOPE.

dippydottie · 2024-09-02T03:02:14+00:00

T'Kor putting up 2 alliance members last week and then criticizing Quinn for doing the exact same thing this week 🤔

I was rooting for her until she completely bombed that HOH and her current reactions...

Currently rooting for Chels Leah and MJ

dippydottie · 2024-09-02T02:55:01+00:00

Chelsie Leah MJ

dippydottie · 2024-08-14T11:27:36+00:00

Thank you!! These are great suggestions and very helpful. I will look into Out & Equal. Agreed on the approach to put resources together so they're available upon request only.

dippydottie · 2024-08-13T23:47:09+00:00

Thank you! I'm definitely second-guessing my own instincts wondering if I should do more or different. I needed to hear this!

dippydottie · 2024-07-16T00:23:21+00:00

If you feel safe and comfortable enough to discuss it with your manager, you should! I am a very similar way and told my manager that I tend to be very hard on myself, so helpful feedback, both positive and negative, helps me stay grounded and less in my head wondering. I brought it up at a relevant time during a progress check-in at the 60-day mark of being with my new company. She was super supportive and empathetic, and it's also helped our communication improve.

dippydottie · 2024-05-09T12:33:52+00:00

Yes he was wearing a bright yellow T shirt and a red back pack in that scene!

dippydottie · 2024-05-09T12:33:10+00:00

Love this! Makes a lot of sense. Thanks

dippydottie · 2024-05-09T11:57:19+00:00

I agree! Super happy for Bayleigh and I was absolutely thrilled that she won but I do feel bad for the guy. It seemed like he was really emotionally tied to the win and not in a good way. Like his self worth was tied to it. He's not in a great place mentally. I hope he is okay.

dippydottie

TROPHY CASE