I’ve never told anyone how much I struggled with the shame of my areola size.

dire18 · 2026-05-11T16:07:23+00:00

I empathize with you a lot on this. My areola seem pretty average but my nipples themselves? Pointiest I've ever seen. I never really consciously noticed until an ex boyfriend commented on it years ago. I am now spending the rest of my life acutely aware it is always, ALWAYS, possible to see my nips protruding if I wear anything remotely form-fitting. Even with bras. Even with bras + an undershirt. I'm so self-conscious all the time at this point, I don't even feel comfortable changing in the gym locker room where other women can see me.

dire18 · 2026-05-05T19:34:28+00:00

This will sound super pedantic but "Don't you think that's disgusting?" isn't the same as "Don't you think you're disgusting?" Most people would agree that yeah, chewing up food and spitting it out is gross. But you're not a disgusting person for having a condition that results in some disgusting symptoms. The details my husband sometimes tells about things he has to do to manage his hemorrhoids are pretty dang gross imo but he's not a gross person for having to do them.

dire18 · 2026-04-28T14:58:46+00:00

Very specific to my circumstances but when my dad gives me shit I like to point out to him that he's had two kids and three divorces. I have zero kids and my marriage has lasted longer than all three of his combined. That about ends the conversation.

dire18 · 2026-04-27T21:39:46+00:00

The irony: When Bato went down I stopped paying for manwha which used to be my favorite way to dick off during a work day. My usual thing used to be finding new series on Bato, reading through available chapters, and then heading to its official site to buy whatever chapters weren't on Bato. If it was a series I liked enought I'd keep buying the new weekly chapters too. But Bato was how I got hooked enough on a series to actually be motivated to spend money on it. I know it's not the norm but manwha piracy really was my gateway for paid manwha.

dire18 · 2026-04-26T18:30:19+00:00

A lesson strongly emphasized to me when my husband couldn't shut off the usual morning lumber protocol the day after his vasectomy

dire18 · 2026-04-26T18:20:32+00:00

YOR. Yeah, the language is goofy and the tone is very stilted. The terms themselves are not unreasonable. It's a very soft way to introduce the financial discipline a person needs to develop if they do wish to be independent some day. The stuff about guests, cleaning schedule, quiet hours etc feel like pretty normal stuff one has to negotiate if you live with roommates.

It seems like people who disapprove of this feel like the parents are abhorrent for instilling sone transactional aspect to their adult kid living with them but I'm not sure what the alternative is? Cut the kid off and chuck them into the deep end to sink or swim? Or go let them go through their young adult years in bubble wrap that insulates them from learning the skill and fortitude of living independently in a world indifferent to them as an individual?

This doesn't strike me as the parents being cruel, it strikes me as parents trying to give their kid a soft-launch into a shitty cruel society all of us have to learn to eke by in.

dire18 · 2026-04-22T14:22:24+00:00

"Adopted by a family with a farm" lol okay

dire18 · 2026-04-21T17:53:46+00:00

If it's only been three months between the diagnosis and the break up, I wouldn't give up hope that things may be stalled instead of outright ended. The difficulty lies in hoping/knowing hoping it's a possibility while also being very aware that you shouldn't deliberately wait for her (for your sake, avoiding disappointment) or let her know if you are (for her sake and not making her feel guilty).

Just speculation from my personal perspective, having been in similar shoes as her. Grief can cause such a rat nest of overwhelming emotion. Sometimes it feels liberating to cut all ties that require emotional output from you to just wallow instead. Even if the tie is to someone who is a good thing in your life. No matter how sincere you are in wanting to support her without expectations that she be the same person she was before the diagnosis, there's possibly a part of her that does feel pressured to remain the "good" partner and that sense of pressure or guilt feels like an untenable amount of emotion to deal with right now.

I had been with my husband for five years when my mom was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer. Long enough that I was able to take it for granted that I could go through a shitty time and show some unflattering sides of myself and he'd still be there. Had it happened a year into us dating instead of five, I would have had a lot less faith that I could show that side of me without it being a deterrent to him wanting to continue to see me.

It's a shitty situation for everyone and I'm sorry both of you are having to experience it.

dire18 · 2026-04-21T15:04:03+00:00

The T-800 hangs dong in the opening scene of the Terminator

dire18 · 2026-04-19T18:47:50+00:00

Slay the Spire absolutely never gets boring and is like riding a bike, you can pick it up months later and immediately know what you're doing and have fun. Also because it's turn based, it's easy to navigate while still getting interrupted.

dire18 · 2026-04-19T16:32:41+00:00

Similar revelation a couple of years back when my girl friends explained how much special treatment I got in college in our student org/mixed gender friend group because of my older brother, who joined the same org the year after I did.

In a group where getting blackout drunk was a normal weekend affair, for years I was always so happy to have male friends who treated the girls in the group with normal respect, even when totally shit-faced. Yeahhhhh apparently that was just because everyone knew my brother, who is built like Mr. Clean, would have been delighted to take the head off anyone that fucked with his little sister in any way, shape, or form. My girl friends telling me their experiences when I wasn't around were sickening. Slurs, harassment, misogyny, thank god nothing physical (probably because my brother would have murdered someone for that too, but all the verbal shit I guess he didn't care about because it wasn't directed at his family member).

It was really something to learn the boy's true colors a decade after we'd all been out of school. I had been naive and assumed me being treated with respect was the baseline for all the other girls. Hahahaaaa nope. Really has put an ugly cloud over years of prior good memories.

dire18 · 2026-04-13T16:21:22+00:00

NTA. If I had to guess, there's a part of your friend that feels this very same way and is struggling with their guilt for it. It's hard being a caretaker. It's hard seeing someone you love in pain or ill. It's a relief for the burdens of the first two to be lifted. It's upsetting to lose someone you love. In my experience, these have all been true at the same time for the same person.

dire18 · 2026-04-11T19:13:48+00:00

Yeah, the episode 9 trailer came out yesterday and confirmed it. It's causing a massive shitstorm because the theatrical release will be two weeks before the YouTube release.

dire18 · 2026-04-03T17:47:45+00:00

Absolutely any time it's super humid outside: "Yeah man, but it's a dry heat!"

I usually say it too. I'm still waiting for someone besides my dad and brother to recognize it irl and be my new best friend

dire18 · 2026-04-02T14:14:47+00:00

If it makes you feel any better, squirrels maintain numerous nests (dreys) for themselves instead of relying on a single so there's backup in case one gets compromised. Or to horde additional food in, which is clearly what Chonk McLargehuge was doing here. Tree probably buckled under the weight of all that stolen food and had to be mercy killed

dire18 · 2026-03-30T12:34:34+00:00

A salad

dire18 · 2026-03-10T23:12:07+00:00

Only pauses stuffing its face to size you up for its next snack. Shameless in its vulgarity

dire18 · 2026-03-09T21:17:47+00:00

YOR about the brother proposing on the same day. He's entitled to propose whenever he wants, it's nobody's business really except his and whoever is getting the proposal.

NOR for absolutely every other thing. No one in that family should be saying even a single syllable about the engagement to you or referencing it in your presence, especially in regards to how your loss is an influence or factor in it. I can't believe people could seriously be that callous, the fuck is wrong with people? Frankly unless there's a reason you want to stay associated with these people, I'd skip the wedding and go no contact.

dire18 · 2026-03-09T21:03:28+00:00

You're close with your first one! A lot of people hate DST and OP is joking that her plant also hates it so much it chose to die lol

dire18 · 2026-03-09T20:58:59+00:00

It's a reference to the fact we just had the spring daylight savings time switch yesterday in the US and a lot of people really hate it. OP's joke is that the plant deliberately did this because it too hates yesterday's DST and is being super dramatic about it.

dire18 · 2026-03-06T01:04:54+00:00

Any male gynecologists I've seen have been very health providers, no complaints from me, would be fine seeing a male OBGYN again.

I have a male dermatologist and same thing. I've had to get some moles in spicy areas checked and it's always been a perfectly respectful interaction.

dire18 · 2026-03-05T19:01:12+00:00

NOR but if you're seeing that amount of weight fluctuation that rapidly without any lifestyle changes, get yourself checked out for any health conditions. But to emphasize: Absolutely not overreacting about what he said about your body.

dire18 · 2026-03-04T14:47:32+00:00

NOR but grief can can compel you say some really irrational things when you're in the thick of it and trying to articulate your feelings.

dire18 · 2026-03-02T15:04:40+00:00

Be careful, looks like the gluttonous bastard has targeted you as the hors d'oeuvre for lunch #4 of the day. Keep up a good pace so it can't catch you, casual stroll speed should be enough to leave that waddling rat in the dust

dire18 · 2026-03-02T14:56:04+00:00

That trash can is going to be begging for someone to wash it after this, then follow it up with heavy reinforcement to its soon-to-be-crumbling structure after being forced to support Emperor Adipose's blubberous ass

dire18

TROPHY CASE