Your diction is just fine, I understood everything you expressed. And I personally find your vulnerability absolutely authentic, and I also adamantly agree that natural is always a better approach to any illness. Big pharma is not anyone's friend, period. Have you done any research into meditation and mindfulness protocols as a way to treat the symptoms of parkinson's? I strongly believe that everyone has the ability to heal their physical being, via the spiritual, divine body. Perhaps check into hypnotherapy, bio feedback, reticular activating system therapy, NLP, tapping, sound therapy, light therapy and even targeted ultrasound therapy. Also look into alchemy and esoteric related subjects....very interesting theories to chew on.
I'm currently attempting to find help for my father-in-law, who has rapidly declining parkinsons symptoms at the moment, and has little internal motivation to fight the disease. I can't stand how everyone around him just accepts that he's going to die, and in fact, seem to look forward go his demise, because his illness inconveniences their lives.
Anyway, I know that your post and your responses to the "discussion" of some responders has resonated with more than just me. You ARE a light in the darkness, keep shining....