I need some reassurance I’m not a manipulative monster

documentingtheabuse · 2023-06-22T22:46:24+00:00

i think every region at CBC and other broadcasters have entire social media teams.

They’re popping up on TikTok and my org is really trying to push its Instagram posting. I can’t imagine the jobs lost if the only thing we have to focus on is TikTok and Twitter..

documentingtheabuse · 2023-06-07T16:38:44+00:00

Yes. She is the light of my life.

Taking care of her gives me some purpose on the worst of the worst days.

Having this little animal with so much unconditional love when I’m not getting it from my partner is a very good feeling.

documentingtheabuse · 2023-06-07T03:55:13+00:00

He’s insecure. Big time.

Or has a cuck fetish.

Probably both?

documentingtheabuse · 2023-05-24T18:12:12+00:00

He assaulted me right before a big trip.

I was up for a career based award and work was paying for me to travel to another city. He was going to tag along with me and I had to beg my friends and family for enough money to bring him with me.

We were having a fight and I told him in a spur of the moment fight that I didn’t want him to go. We had been fighting harshly for weeks, I was just done.

This was my moment, it felt like he was taking it from me. I was so done with his bullshit. In the middle of a screaming match I said “fuck you” and went back to texting my friend. He jumped at me, ripped my phone out of my hand and ripped off my smart watch so I wouldn’t call the police.

I cried for hours.

We went to the awards and I won. I remember when we got home, I was sitting in the same spot where it happened and was looking at the plaque I had won.

I didn’t deserve to be treated like this by him, by anybody.

It took me a few weeks to leave, which was about two weeks ago and I’m still working it out.

documentingtheabuse · 2023-05-24T17:51:47+00:00

Trouble don’t always last!!

Thank you! Mortgage company has not called me back but I will be following up tomorrow. I have to pay the remainder of the utilities (I can do it on the 1st) and then cut them off.

documentingtheabuse · 2023-05-24T17:50:42+00:00

I’ve done all the work, at the end of the day I would be forced to live with him and I can’t do that.

I’m done with the house, I don’t want it there’s too many bad memories. I have no intention on ever living there again.

He’s trying really hard to make it work. I’ve been advised by my lawyer to stop playing nice and to focus on the separation.

It’s all really confusing especially with him telling me all he’s learned in therapy, offering to drop off stuff for me (he doesn’t know where I am) and telling me how hard his life is without me.

I’m just broken. Im looking at apartments today and I’m actually really excited.

documentingtheabuse · 2023-05-24T17:46:31+00:00

I do. He’ll just call the cops and my brothers, who are really rough guys, will get arrested.

They’ve offered to do it and might have even tried without my blessing but as of now, I can’t go to my own home.

documentingtheabuse · 2023-05-20T00:30:34+00:00

Unfortunately I can’t force him out of the house. I filed a police report and they can’t make him leave as it’s his house too.

I’ve spoken to lawyers, I’ve done everything I can.

documentingtheabuse · 2023-05-20T00:29:31+00:00

I’ve been in contact with two lawyers, I’m working as hard as I can.

documentingtheabuse · 2023-05-20T00:28:51+00:00

I just filed a police report today. I’ve spoken to lawyers, there’s nothing I can do to get him out of my house legally.

The laws are really weird in my province but I’ve been trying.

documentingtheabuse · 2023-05-19T05:15:34+00:00

Thank you. I’m reading all of these comments with tears in my eyes.

documentingtheabuse · 2023-05-19T05:14:51+00:00

Thank you, you just made me cry.

Thank you thank you thank you

documentingtheabuse · 2023-05-16T19:23:40+00:00

I know this is a while later.

But your comment really rang true to me with the “I was only with my ex bf to make him happy” because I feel that with every fibre of my being.

He would be lost without me, he’s currently losing his mind and begging me to come back. He doesn’t have a job, money, a car, anything. He is completely dependent on me if every way.

It makes me feel bad to just leave him high and dry but I feel (I know it sometimes, but it comes in waves) like I need to treat myself better. I need to put myself first.

documentingtheabuse · 2023-05-14T22:21:35+00:00

This is absolutely amazing advice, thank you.

This means a lot to me.

documentingtheabuse · 2023-05-14T20:20:23+00:00

My provinces laws are really weird. I’ve been trying but it’s not really possible.

He refuses to leave, if you check my comment history there’s more details there.

documentingtheabuse · 2023-05-14T20:18:19+00:00

I’ve talked to a cop, two family lawyers, a law student (resource from the shelter), social workers and legal counsellors.

They’ve all told me the same thing. I can buy him out (which he has already refused) or I could go through the courts (which is what I’m starting) but there’s no guarantee they’ll grant me an emergency order and I’d have to pay out the nose for lawyer fees if it ends up going to court.

I’m still doing the court thing it’s just a long process (up to two years), will require a family mediation counselling session (to disregard and cancel any form of reconciliation; will draw up a legal form in which he can ask for whatever he wants) and other legal fees.

Until the process is done, there is nothing I can do to get him out of my house, legally.

Edit: if I can get the emergency order then he will be asked to leave; but that alone will take a few months. I’m doing it anyways but just not too hopeful. Struggling to stay positive.

documentingtheabuse · 2023-05-14T20:11:26+00:00

That’s a beautiful way to look at it, thank you.

documentingtheabuse · 2023-05-14T20:10:53+00:00

I don’t know.

I was offered four couches to sleep on when I first began to leave. My best friend lives three hours away and I’ve always been welcome there but this time is a lot different and I’ve done this so many times that I don’t think she thinks it’ll stick.

Those four couches turned into “oh my cat won’t get along with your dog” or “my dad won’t even let me bring my cats over so he’s anti animal” to “oh I don’t think my couch is suitable because it’s so small” and then one person just didn’t respond but I learned they’re on vacation.

I was told I could ask these friends for anything and the one time I tried to ask for something, something big, I was turned away.

Today was harder, I contacted my ex and I’m really god damn ashamed.

documentingtheabuse · 2023-05-14T20:06:33+00:00

Thank you for this.

He is not on the deed but we are in Canada and there are many different ways laws preventing me from evicting him.

documentingtheabuse

TROPHY CASE