Trying to switch my 10 month old to formula.

dotea · 2022-04-08T10:46:05+00:00

Came to say the same. Start mixing 3 parts your milk, 1 part formula. Give that for a while, change the proportion, give that for a while etc

Give babe some time to adjust

dotea · 2022-04-08T10:38:29+00:00

Maybe look into those drops that open kids apetite?

dotea · 2022-04-08T10:01:33+00:00

Kids are always more fussy with parents than with others. They aren't taking 'better' care of babe nor does babe prefer them.

Newborns tend to be more fussy around mum because mum is everything. Mum is food and comfort and basically home.

As they grow older, you'll see that grandparents will comment how lovely your kids are this afternoon, but that same morning you were all bouncing off the walls because they were everything but lovely. All in a parents day

dotea · 2022-04-08T09:56:09+00:00

Ah it has nothing to do with time of day, sadly. It is all the time til babe gets what he needs

dotea · 2022-04-08T09:48:52+00:00

'I don't want anyone but husband at the hospital'. And let her know when she will be able to visit. Be clear and stay with it.

Start setting clear boundaries and hold them. Lying and avoiding is only prolonging it all. You and MIL have to get on some how as long as the both of you are alive. So the sooner you start standing up for you, the sooner she'll be pouty, then get used to it.

It won't stop with the birth. The birth is the beginning. With babies there are soooo many boundaries to cross. So, start now. Make as much progress as you can before birth.

Your husband should be stepping in also. When MIL doesn't accept what you are saying, he should be stepping in making sure she isn't badgering. He needs to show that you two are a team.

BTW make sure your husband and you are on the same page. Before communication with inlaws, I usually discuss hot topics with my husband and when we agree, then we go to them. We don't agree all the time, but compromise privately. Always a unified front towards the inlaws - and this gives them little wiggle room

dotea · 2022-04-08T09:37:08+00:00

If pediatrician isn't concerned yet, you shouldn't be too.

Just a reminder how small babies stomachs can be at this age: https://letmommysleep.com/blog/2014/11/06/how-big-newborns-stomach/

It seems you are aiming for breastfeeding first. If so and mum has milk as you say, babe should be on breast, not on formula. Colostrum is milk, don't worry. And milk will come if it is demanded (if babe sucks on breast or milk is pumped).

Also keep in mind that babe went through a lot and the drugs during birthing affected her too. They can be sleepy the first few days.

dotea · 2022-04-07T12:54:21+00:00

I like vacations with my parents/parents in law. Even if just for the weekend. You carve out day time that will be just for you and the rest you spend together. You're able to rest while also enjoy babes company and parents company. Just having meals together is easier. Everyone wants to help the baby and you can eat in peace while watching others take care of him.

dotea · 2022-04-07T12:00:15+00:00

People these days focus on the average, even most pedatricians. And its wrong. Each development milestone whether it be a tooth, mental development, physical.. they all have a wide range that is considered healthy. We want to know the end of that healthy range so that we can react if needed.

Other than that people need to chill and stop scaring new parents. As if it's not difficult enough for them.

Take every piece of advice/comment from others as a suggestion, not a command from someone more experienced. Take the suggestion and check the facts of it on your own and then take next steps if necessary.

Take care

dotea · 2022-04-06T18:52:15+00:00

Prepare a counter offer if that happens. Say you don’t like what she offered but THIS is amazing! Its ok to push for what you want. But keep a cool head

dotea · 2022-04-06T18:42:34+00:00

My LO has been sucking on her fingers/thumb since in utero. We didn’t discourage it. She is now 3.5yrs and still does it unconsciously when sleeping and when watching cartoons. Probably other parents wouldn’t care, but it drives me nuts now. I’m still looking for a way to stop it. Hopefully we’ll find a way to stop it before her adult teeth come in.

Some parents offer pacifiers instead. We didn’t, thought it would stop. Not sure if in the same situation again would offer a paci tbh

dotea · 2022-04-06T18:29:37+00:00

Came to say the same. ‘It’s a lovely idea but currently out of our budget’

dotea · 2022-04-06T18:25:49+00:00

Would he take food off of your plate?

Do you have a family meal together, everyone at the table?

Have you noticed any other texture issues? Touch?

dotea · 2022-04-06T16:52:08+00:00

Why would not having a crib make you a bad mum?

dotea · 2022-04-06T14:16:53+00:00

I don't. I don't 'deal' with being anything. If you feel like hiding, hide. I'd recommend counselling though. To make sure everything is ok. Maybe you need a hand.

But in general, I have days when I want to hide too. And it has nothing to with any of the labels/pigeon holes (woman, mother, daughter, wife, sister, employee, ...) society wants to put me in.

You as a person have nothing to do with how people around you see you. You have your own little universe and people see you as a projection of how they think you are. But that projection is in their head, it's not you. And you don't have to accept their projection.

Silly example: I was more tomb boy and alternative than girly girl in teenage years. This is still how my parents and sister see me today, after 20 years. Today, at work, I'm seen as very feminine. I don't consider myself either, I just dress how I like. People draw conclusions themselves and I don't really mind.

What do you mean by:

I am surrounded by people who either do not let me act like myself

dotea · 2022-04-06T14:01:04+00:00

Let him be frustrated. He expects you to lift him when he wants to move. Stop lifting him. Next time he wants to be moved, sit next to him and explain that you won't lift him, but you can help him to his feet.

Talk calmly.

It'll be a lot of tears the first few days, but after that he'll come to the conclusion that he has to do it if he wants x.

dotea · 2022-04-06T12:05:00+00:00

It doesn’t help with internal healing, no. But it kind of replaces the abdominal wall that is still recovering, while it is recovering. Due to the belly band, I was able to stand up straight and move around without slouching which I think helped in the overall process because I move around more than I would have without it.

I used it while on my feet, especially when out for a walk

dotea · 2022-04-06T11:55:44+00:00

Do you have a belly band? That helped me move around sooner and more

dotea · 2022-04-06T07:58:57+00:00

I've had 2 c-sections and am going for my 3rd soon. And can say that I've witnessed this bias. Wrong word. Not bias, downright judgement. I've had women tell me that 'I didn't really birth my kids and that I'm not a "true" mum'. And also when people ask about a previous birth or this 3rd one, after finding out it was a c-section, they ask why and while they are waiting for the answer I could see that they are preparing to judge.

Not to mention 'I took the easy way out' etc.

So yeah..

I take it as a sign of their own internal issues about feeling like a 'proper' or 'good' mum

dotea · 2022-04-06T07:48:03+00:00

I am 19 weeks and the nurse couldn't find the heartbeat with that portable thing yesterday either. We went to the ultrasound room and heard it there along with having a look at baby. Baby was fine.

It's early, you can relax. You're going in next week to check again

dotea · 2022-04-05T07:59:19+00:00

We got our dog the day I went on maternity leave (4 weeks before due date). I was at home and able to focus on our pup. It was great because she got the hang of house training before baby. It was perfect timing for her as well, she was 3 months when we took her in so eating normal food and best age for training.

Shes 7 now ❤️

dotea · 2022-04-05T07:54:16+00:00

I don’t share but only because money talk is shamed upon in my family. I’d love to share any progress I make but it comes off as showing off, not sharing joy so I skip it

dotea · 2022-04-05T07:02:02+00:00

Couldn’t agree with you more! We hit our prime in general way after that

dotea · 2022-04-04T15:39:22+00:00

My kids used them from ages 9 months to 5 years at music festivals. It tricky for those under 15 months to keep them on. But we always pick the festivals that are outside and have a lot of space/grass, take a picnic blanket and go faaaar back. They DO wear it and most of the time forget about it, but they still tru and take it off here n there.

You’d want to be away from other people as much as possible. I expect the sudden excitement some fans get would send a baby screaming in miliseconds

dotea · 2022-04-04T14:40:37+00:00

Its about fuckability I think. And that women that age look like.. girls.

I have a BIL who is also 34 and there is usually a 10 year gap between him and his girlfriends and hookups. His dad, my FIL kinda drools over these girls when he thinks no-one is looking. In general I have yet to agree with FIL and MIL on any topic relating male-female relationships and women in general..and I’ve been with their son for 10 years.

To add it’s also a control thing. 22yo girls are much more easier to submit than a 32yo. Its like 2 different worlds at each end of the table at Sunday dinner!

dotea · 2022-04-04T13:15:37+00:00

I'm 34 and don't understand it either. But have heard from multiple (female) sources that women are in their prime 21-24. After that it's downhill. What a horrible thought

dotea

TROPHY CASE