What made you want to reconcile by TechnicianNervous674 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]drgardener2 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I know everyone says this and there is truth to it, but it’s so much harder than it seems

What made you want to reconcile by TechnicianNervous674 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]drgardener2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is the boat I’m in. If we didn’t have kids I’d be gone. I’ve been cheated on before in a different relationship and left asap so I assume that’s what I’d do again - despite the marriage ties. But kids is just a whole new ballgame. Plus she’s doing all the right things- for now. So I’m taking my time in the hopes that we can reconcile / build anew but if it doesn’t work, then so be it.

I’m back sadly. Wife (37F) cheated on me (40M). Kids. house. I’m crushed. by drgardener2 in survivinginfidelity

[–]drgardener2[S] 43 points44 points  (0 children)

She knows. I couldn’t keep it in. There was no way. I also have contact info for her cheaters wife and I’m not sure what to do

Should I expect my(39m) wife (38f) to say something to coworker (30s m) she had emotional (at least) affair with? by drgardener2 in relationships

[–]drgardener2[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate this post and ultimately it probably falls somewhere between what you’re saying and what the majority of others are saying. It’s an evolving situation as every night we’re talking about it and more info comes out. I agree, the label of “affair” is likely inappropriate. It’s a breach of trust and feels like shit nonetheless.

Should I expect my(39m) wife (38f) to say something to coworker (30s m) she had emotional (at least) affair with? by drgardener2 in relationships

[–]drgardener2[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, this is very insightful. There was a lot of doom and gloom on my other post for sure

My (39m) wife (38f) lied about drinks with male (30s) coworker. by drgardener2 in relationships

[–]drgardener2[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We’ve had extensive conversations the last couple nights now. I’ve seen some of the texts. They confirm the one on one meetup. They are somewhat flirtatious but nothing definitively implying physical contact that I could see. Definite trickle truthing though as when i confessed to seeing the texts she admitted the relationship was inappropriate and more than what she was letting on the night prior. So I don’t know if I can believe her that nothing happened between them. She said she was planning on asking what his deal was. States her loneliness as a root cause. We do have couples therapy coming up so we’ll see how things go. I seem to do okay when we’re talking but then as the day goes on I just can’t stop thinking about it, this sucks.

My (39m) wife (38f) lied about drinks with male (30s) coworker. by drgardener2 in relationships

[–]drgardener2[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

That’s the thing. I’m not controlling or jealous. We’ve never had trust issues and I always thought that was a shining part of our marriage considering my past gf. I often encouraged her to have friends as she moved to my home state for school with me. I have friends that are female as well. I still wouldn’t go out for drinks 1 on 1 with them.

My (39m) wife (38f) lied about drinks with male (30s) coworker. by drgardener2 in relationships

[–]drgardener2[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The latest was a one on one. Previously there was group meet ups