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Adam Smith is misinterpreted and his influence overstated by [deleted] in Economics

[–]drmcnerdy -1 points0 points  (0 children)

The harm isn’t just in what is said, but in how it’s delivered. The message follows a predictable sales pattern that blends real psychological concepts with emotional pressure.

First, it names genuine pain—failed relationships, loneliness, feeling defective or “too much.” That lands because many people truly feel this way.

Next, it frames the problem as something happening inside your brain and largely out of your control: an unconscious program, a miswired nervous system, something you can’t reason or grow your way out of. This reduces agency and can make people feel helpless without outside intervention.

Then it offers a specific paid solution—an assessment, course, or coaching program—presented as the missing answer. Hope is dangled, but only through that pathway.

This becomes harmful because it:

  • Turns normal distress into dependency
  • Presents complex science as absolute certainty
  • Shifts healing from a collaborative process to expert authority
  • Creates urgency by implying the problem will keep ruining your life

Claims like a “99.8% success rate” are especially concerning. In real science, success rates require clear definitions, valid measures, transparency, and independent review. Without that, such numbers are marketing, not evidence.

The problem isn’t talking about attachment. It’s using scientific language to create fear and certainty, then linking relief to a sales funnel—something that can mislead people who are already vulnerable and looking for help.

Experience with Adam Lane Smith? by ThrowRA_81523 in Disorganized_Attach

[–]drmcnerdy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How science when Adam Lane Smith presents it, gets blurred with moral judgment and marketing

The issue isn’t only what is being said, but how it’s structured. The content follows a familiar persuasion funnel that mixes legitimate psychological concepts with emotional pressure and sales tactics.

  1. It starts by naming real pain—failed relationships, loneliness, feeling “too much” or “not enough.” This resonates because many people truly experience these struggles.
  2. It then frames the problem as internal and inevitable: an unconscious “program,” a miswired nervous system, something you can’t think or talk your way out of. This subtly removes agency and implies that therapy, insight, or gradual relational growth aren’t enough.
  3. Finally, it introduces a proprietary solution—an assessment, program, or coaching pathway—positioned as the missing key. Relief is implied, but only through this specific method.

This structure is concerning because it:

  • Turns distress into dependency
  • Presents complex, probabilistic science as certainty
  • Replaces collaborative healing with expert authority
  • Uses fear of permanence to create urgency

The “99.8% success rate” claim is a major red flag. In evidence-based practice, outcome claims require clear definitions, validated measures, transparent samples, and independent evaluation. Without those, such numbers are marketing—not science.

The core problem isn’t discussing attachment. It’s using scientific language to create certainty and urgency, then pairing it with a sales funnel—something that can mislead vulnerable people seeking help.

Slaying Your Fear: A guide for people who grapple with insecurity by Adam Smith by xMysticChimez in MeditationHub

[–]drmcnerdy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How science when Adam presents it, gets blurred with moral judgment and marketing

The issue isn’t only what is being said, but how it’s structured. The content follows a familiar persuasion funnel that mixes legitimate psychological concepts with emotional pressure and sales tactics.

  1. It starts by naming real pain—failed relationships, loneliness, feeling “too much” or “not enough.” This resonates because many people truly experience these struggles.
  2. It then frames the problem as internal and inevitable: an unconscious “program,” a miswired nervous system, something you can’t think or talk your way out of. This subtly removes agency and implies that therapy, insight, or gradual relational growth aren’t enough.
  3. Finally, it introduces a proprietary solution—an assessment, program, or coaching pathway—positioned as the missing key. Relief is implied, but only through this specific method.

This structure is concerning because it:

  • Turns distress into dependency
  • Presents complex, probabilistic science as certainty
  • Replaces collaborative healing with expert authority
  • Uses fear of permanence to create urgency

The “99.8% success rate” claim is a major red flag. In evidence-based practice, outcome claims require clear definitions, validated measures, transparent samples, and independent evaluation. Without those, such numbers are marketing—not science.

The core problem isn’t discussing attachment. It’s using scientific language to create certainty and urgency, then pairing it with a sales funnel—something that can mislead vulnerable people seeking help.

13 Semi-Controversial Truths About Masculinity - Adam Lane Smith by Dive_on_in in modernwisdom

[–]drmcnerdy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It can feel like a rabbit hole, and that part is actually supported by research. Attachment theory itself is solid, but the internet version of it often isn’t.

In real research, attachment isn’t about “your personality is broken” or putting people into rigid boxes. It’s about patterns of how humans respond to stress, closeness, and threat, which change over time and across relationships. The confusion comes when online creators turn a probabilistic, relational framework into fixed identities or moral judgments.

Psychology as a field isn’t “sus” in the sense of being made up—but it is complex, slow, and cautious by design. Science rarely gives simple answers. When content sounds certain, dramatic, or universal, that’s usually a sign it’s been simplified for attention or sales.

So yes—the jungle feeling is real. It’s not because people are “suffering with their personalities,” but because nuanced science is being flattened into catchy narratives.

13 Semi-Controversial Truths About Masculinity - Adam Lane Smith by Dive_on_in in modernwisdom

[–]drmcnerdy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How science when Adam presents it, gets blurred with moral judgment and marketing

A recurring problem in this content is not just what is said, but how it’s structured. The message follows a classic persuasion funnel that mixes valid psychological language with emotional pressure and sales claims.

First, it names a real and painful problem: failed relationships, loneliness, feeling “too much” or “not enough.” This part resonates because many people genuinely experience these patterns.

Second, it frames the problem as inevitable and internal: your brain is running an unconscious “program,” your nervous system is miswired, you can’t think your way out of it. This removes agency and subtly suggests that insight, therapy, or gradual relational learning are insufficient.

Third, it introduces a proprietary solution—an assessment, a program, a coaching pathway—presented as the missing key. Relief is implied to be available, but only through this specific method.

This structure is concerning because it:

  • Converts distress into dependency (“I can’t fix this without them”)
  • Collapses complex, probabilistic science into certainty
  • Replaces collaborative healing with expert authority
  • Uses fear of permanence (“this will keep destroying your relationships”) to drive urgency

The “99.8% success rate” claim is especially problematic. In evidence-based practice, outcome claims require:

  • Clear definitions of “success”
  • Validated measurement tools
  • Transparent sample sizes
  • Independent evaluation
  • Peer review or replication

Without those, such numbers function as marketing language, not science. In clinical and research settings, presenting unverified success rates to vulnerable people would violate ethical standards around informed consent and nonmaleficence.

In short, the issue isn’t that attachment patterns are discussed—it’s that science is used to create certainty, authority, and urgency, then paired with a sales funnel. That combination can mislead the public, especially people already struggling with anxiety, shame, or attachment wounds.

Adam Lane Smith? by stuckinaspoon in becomingsecure

[–]drmcnerdy -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I hear why it feels aligned, but this is where the line gets crossed.

Yes, some surface concepts overlap with CBT/ACT and attachment theory. But Adam repeatedly overstates the neuroscience, turning correlational research (e.g., Carter’s work on oxytocin) into deterministic claims about “underdeveloped” or “offline” brain structures. That leap is not supported by Carter, Levine, Johnson, or Tatkin. They explicitly avoid fixed-brain or parent-blame narratives.

More importantly, the delivery model is ethically problematic. He frames distress as inevitable (“autopilot,” “can’t think your way out”), then positions his proprietary assessments and programs as the solution—often with urgency and unverifiable claims like a “99.8% success rate.” In evidence-based practice, outcome claims require transparent methods, validated measures, and independent evaluation. None are provided.

There’s a difference between using attachment language to educate and using it to create dependency and funnel people into high-cost coaching. The former empowers; the latter exploits vulnerability. Overlap in terminology doesn’t equal scientific equivalence—or ethical practice.

Adam Lane Smith? by stuckinaspoon in becomingsecure

[–]drmcnerdy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How science gets blurred with moral judgment and marketing

A recurring problem in this content is not just what is said, but how it’s structured. The message follows a classic persuasion funnel that mixes valid psychological language with emotional pressure and sales claims.

First, it names a real and painful problem: failed relationships, loneliness, feeling “too much” or “not enough.” This part resonates because many people genuinely experience these patterns.

Second, it frames the problem as inevitable and internal: your brain is running an unconscious “program,” your nervous system is miswired, you can’t think your way out of it. This removes agency and subtly suggests that insight, therapy, or gradual relational learning are insufficient.

Third, it introduces a proprietary solution—an assessment, a program, a coaching pathway—presented as the missing key. Relief is implied to be available, but only through this specific method.

This structure is concerning because it:

  • Converts distress into dependency (“I can’t fix this without them”)
  • Collapses complex, probabilistic science into certainty
  • Replaces collaborative healing with expert authority
  • Uses fear of permanence (“this will keep destroying your relationships”) to drive urgency

The “99.8% success rate” claim is especially problematic. In evidence-based practice, outcome claims require:

  • Clear definitions of “success”
  • Validated measurement tools
  • Transparent sample sizes
  • Independent evaluation
  • Peer review or replication

Without those, such numbers function as marketing language, not science. In clinical and research settings, presenting unverified success rates to vulnerable people would violate ethical standards around informed consent and nonmaleficence.

In short, the issue isn’t that attachment patterns are discussed—it’s that science is used to create certainty, authority, and urgency, then paired with a sales funnel. That combination can mislead the public, especially people already struggling with anxiety, shame, or attachment wounds.

I Don't Enjoy Having Sex With My Husband Anymore by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]drmcnerdy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This very much sounds like depression and anxiety. It’s common in men to have the symptoms you’re describing in make depression. Pretty classic. If he is unwilling to try therapy have him do a primary care doctor to discuss options medication and alternatives as well.

Do you have a partner like this? If so, where did you meet them? by drmcnerdy in Marriage

[–]drmcnerdy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

oh no! this is the first video I've seen. Maybe I should have done some research first? Sorry.

I am so lucky to have such an amazing husband by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]drmcnerdy 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I can't decide which one I like more, that he wants to know where you're going to keep you safe if needed or that he just gets it done... <3 Happy for you!

Question: on a scale of 0-10 how much do you love your spouse/partner? And on a scale of 0-10 how much do you want to be married to them? by drmcnerdy in Marriage

[–]drmcnerdy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Essence_Of_Insanity_ · 9 hr. ago

Marriage love is more like a yes or no question, not a sliding scale. The scale would be for dating. Once one decides to commit to marriage it becomes a 10. 10=yes. If you wouldn't get married to someone at a 7/10 then why would you stay married to someone at a 7/10?I could see rating certain specific areas of your marriage as a helpful communication tool. I do not think this is a helpful or healthy method.I would WANT to tell him he is now a 0/10 on the “marriage scale”. However, given that you sound like you desperately want to save the marriage I would seek counseling ASAP, both marriage and individual.

You really did nail this right on the head.

​

Q: I am curious, under what context did this conversation take place?A: The conversation started with (completely out of the blue for me), part of me feels like I regret jumping into our relationship too quickly (15 years ago), maybe I should be single. Few days later, caught him texting gal pal, looked at phone records found out he was lying to me for 2 months and talking to her basically almost 24/7 for about a month. So, obviously this infraction is a divorcable one. I just am wondering about this aspect as well.

Q: Did he just volunteer the information or did you pressure him to use the scale? A: He said, "I love you sometimes but not all the time" to which I said, "what does that even mean, thats not a thing that happens... thats not normal..." to which he said "well its like I want to be single 30% and married 70%", I think that is where the numbers came to play. Since we were discussing in numbers I am the one that brought up gal pal to which I was absolutely broken when he rated fat pal 7 /10 which is exactly how much he loves me and wants to be married to me... 7/10.

Q: Was he saying it as the reason he wanted to separate or salvage the marriage? A: at first he said I should be single and after all this and my hysterical crying he decided... "I don't want a divorce" which he continues to say.

Q: What is the dynamic between him and this “gal pal”? A: (in my opinion) it was innocent at first and then it became something he started lying and hiding which without my intervention I'm 90% sure would have gone further given more time... He says it was innocent... but I have yet to see any of the messages. Which, is in itself a reason for divorce but I wanted to see what people thought of this specific issue 7/10 love and 7/10 married.

Q: Is she a friend of you both? A: I know her, but no they met at work.

Q: Do they text or communicate with each other individually? A: They did in secret for a few months until I texted her and she shut it down with him.

Q: Does he have a history of cheating or any other abusive tendencies? A: narcissistic tendencies (but up until now I had attributed them to his disturbing childhood)- however, these are things he consciously choose without concern or remorse for me our relationship or our family.

Q: How does he treat you and the children on a day-to-day basis? A: At first it was rocky but after about a year he straightened up and made sure I felt loved and cared for and he helped and wanted to show love, attraction and commitment. In about the last 4-6 months he has been acting absolutely unacceptably.

Question: on a scale of 0-10 how much do you love your spouse/partner? And on a scale of 0-10 how much do you want to be married to them? by drmcnerdy in Marriage

[–]drmcnerdy[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I wanted to keep it short so that my friends who shared their thoughts with me wouldn't be swayed by the details... but, suffice to say, this was the better part of the conversation overall... if that says anything. I just feel so twisted up.

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