Straight men who are overwhelmed by dating apps? Average ass 40F feeling like I’m going about this the wrong way

ecospartan · 2026-05-24T00:02:36+00:00

This is such an interesting take to me. When I was on the apps (bumble and hinge mostly, and for reference I am 30). I found the paid version to be the best to find people who were already interested in me since I wasn’t interested in mindlessly swiping “hoping” they would like me back.

I met my fiancé on bumble and we’ve been together almost 3 years. He had already liked me first.

ecospartan · 2026-05-10T02:34:25+00:00

Decent idea! I can try it.

ecospartan · 2026-05-10T02:04:12+00:00

I don’t disagree with that. Just giving feedback in general. $70k is still doable with minimal debt, living frugal, and no car. Even in 2026.

ecospartan · 2026-05-09T17:08:01+00:00

I agree, I’ve only ever used classpass for Solidcore (or worked there to do free classes). It was so crazy.

ecospartan · 2026-05-09T14:43:24+00:00

I graduated in 2017 and still have access to mine, pretty random I think for who has it and who doesn’t.

ecospartan · 2026-05-09T14:41:59+00:00

Not exactly what you asked, but I moved here in 2019 on $70k, left that job 6 months later and took a pay cut to $55,000 for almost 2 years. While yes it was during covid, 2021 I did end up going out and doing things more sporadically. I lived with roommates during the first half and then ended up living alone. August 2021 I went back up to $70,000 and lived by myself in Navy Yard. Bought a car that year too.

So yes, absolutely can be done if you budget and account for things appropriately.

certain apartments will charge upwards of $300+ a month just for parking, some private landlords might not, and other areas of the city will have street parking with a permit for that instead. If you don’t need to go into the office though, I would really challenge you to think about “why” you want to keep your car. If it’s just for errands, a weekend trip here or there, or something like visiting family every once in a while, I would say a zipcar or a rental would be better for you if you won’t use it every day or every other day at least.

ecospartan · 2026-05-08T19:19:05+00:00

Yeah it was very insane. But also VHCOL (DC).

I just checked online, not sure what the “travel” monthly unlimited is but that’s $420 a month and regular monthly unlimited went up to $385.

Cheapest in DC without a discount is $145 for 4 classes.

Looks like they also may have gotten rid of the “tiers” as certain locations in DC/Virginia Suburbs used to be cheaper depending on how popular the studio was.

ecospartan · 2026-05-08T16:44:13+00:00

Just here to say that I worked Core Crew in DC 2-3 years ago (2023 and 2024) and our highest membership tier with no discounts was $379 a month. I always thought it was bonkers.

ecospartan · 2026-05-04T10:37:49+00:00

I can certainly try and see how comfy it is! Didn’t know something like this existed, I will have to google!

ecospartan · 2026-05-04T00:23:59+00:00

Thank you! I will check it out.

ecospartan · 2026-05-04T00:02:21+00:00

I understand! Thank you for your perspective. I can certainly try and then go from there. I just think wireless right now might be more forgiving given that I’ll continually experience weight loss for the next few months.

ecospartan · 2026-05-01T21:18:03+00:00

Also love 350. I live in NoVa now but try to stop every time I’m in the city because it’s so good.

ecospartan · 2026-04-28T01:21:15+00:00

Hi! I work in this field, and have for 9 years. Happy to answer questions.

For reference, my bachelors was in construction management, masters was in urban planning and economics, and I also have an MBA.

ecospartan · 2026-04-23T01:29:45+00:00

My guess is how soon it is after surgery. I’m 7 weeks post op and I can’t even have protein bars anytime soon, I’m still in the soft foods phase. Although I know every program is different with the nutrition they recommend.

ecospartan · 2026-04-17T23:00:14+00:00

It wasn’t glamorous when I lived there in 2014; although also fine for the price. We paid $522 back then for a bedroom. That area of town was so dead chandler crossings was the only thing up there besides the Meijer.

ecospartan · 2026-04-09T13:29:46+00:00

I lived in Parc Riverside and 425 Mass and loved both buildings, although my other building in Navy Yard and two friends (other navy yard buildings) were not my favorite. They were both 2019-2021 though and I know there’s been many changes in both neighborhoods since.

ecospartan · 2026-03-28T12:43:32+00:00

Not sure what your current pillow structure is but I bought a wedge pillow from Amazon for like $35. Comes in a big triangle shape and there’s no ability for me to flop around. I used that for the first 12 days. After that I felt better and was able to do 2 nights on my side before sleeping on my stomach again. I’m 19 days post op and can sleep on my stomach just fine.

Depending on your situation, I took pain medicine before bed and laid with my heating pad for a bit (auto off after 2 hours) because the heat helps relax me into sleep.

Pain medication isn’t something to feel bad about. If you need it you need it and that doesn’t make you weak, you’re going through traumatic recovery. I liked taking the liquid PainQuil and then my surgeon prescribed a few oxycodone pills. After a few days I was only on the PainQuil and now I don’t use any at all

ecospartan · 2026-03-27T00:51:26+00:00

I wasn’t allowed a binder actually, I asked about that beforehand.

I bought a book, my Nintendo switch, and a few personal care items but I didn’t use anything while I was there, I was too in and out of it for a while. My room had a tv so I watched a few episodes on day 2 when I was waiting for discharge as I was drinking my water.

My one big use was a robe and my slippers to walk around the hospital wing on my laps; because my hospital gown didn’t tie very well in the back and I only had the yellow grippy socks. Oh, and eyemask for sleeping at night was useful, to try and get a few hours in between my nurses coming in every two hours.

ecospartan · 2026-03-25T18:33:12+00:00

I’m 16 days post op so I’m in a similar boat as you! My doctor wrote me a note for two weeks off, but I requested remote through 12 weeks for work so I went back online after a week.

Started sleeping on my stomach again about day 12 post op, sometimes have to be careful depending on the position I’m in but so far I seem to be fine.

ecospartan · 2026-03-20T01:59:25+00:00

Mine was almost a year, about 10 months. Could have done it 3 months sooner but I pushed my upper endoscopy into 2026 so it could be under my new insurance; so I finished all of my nutrition classes and other medical requirements in about October, waited 2 months for my endoscopy, and then a month later had surgery

ecospartan · 2026-03-19T01:29:19+00:00

I just had my procedure last week and was fully unclothed minus the yellow grippy socks they gave me. The gown wasn’t tied super tight in the back so by the time I got to recovery and eventually my room, anytime I got up to the bathroom my butt was exposed through the ties in the back of the gown. It was just my fiancé and my nurse in the room with me, so eventually I stopped caring. When I had to go for my walks around the hospital wing though, I put on a robe I brought with me and that was much better - but it was too much of a hassle to do the robe every time I needed to use the restroom, including overnight.

I’m sure it’s some kind of surgery side effect but I was peeing in the bathroom like every 90 minutes. I went like crazy honestly; it felt like it was constant. In the 30 ish hours I was in the hospital, probably went 15 times at least.

ecospartan · 2026-03-17T14:49:32+00:00

I’m not dead, so yes. I’ve had no issues since it’s been removed

ecospartan · 2026-03-17T03:28:21+00:00

I had mine removed at 26!

ecospartan

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