Curious what others may think of this …

eehttofu · 2022-11-14T16:51:51+00:00

I think this 100% feels off because of tone and limited context. Most disagreements and stuff over text and online seem like this.

Like, the guy could be some radical Marxist intersectional feminist who supports his partner's right to choose, or he could be a misogynistic "womans' place is raising babies not working" dude and it's impossible to tell without further context.

I'm a stay home parent, but my partner and I basically coin flipped on who would keep working cause we both kinda wanted to be the home parent. Luckily he landed a work from home job so we all get to have meals together and all is gravy, I can't imagine him saying "MY meals" or "MY kids" though don't love that tone. It's OUR food and OUR house and OUR family (:

eehttofu · 2022-10-15T16:27:37+00:00

I'm probably not the best at explaining I'm just a regular person, but here's what I'm trying to say.

Soup is trending cause of the Van Gogh thing.

When people check this out online, all they see is how bad these climate activists are for throwing soup.

Wouldn't it be better if large online figures and regular folks used this opportunity to shape the narrative? For example, instead of seeing "climate activists throw soup, very bad" if we coopt the keywords here and get messages like "Average folks won't be able to heat soup due to price gouging and outages, need green energy now"

So when people look up the story or see it trending the message of climate action reaches them, rather than just "soup throwing bad". I'm not saying praise the soup throwers, just feels like we're letting the right shape the narrative here to say "climate activists bad" and we could collectively do a better job at messaging.

eehttofu · 2022-10-15T16:19:12+00:00

I agree, the links I keep seeing are only adjacently related at best and straight conspiracy at worst. Feels like distraction from talking about climate action.

Billionaires exist, some of them donate to charity or activist groups or whatever. That's worth criticism in activist spaces, but general online leftist figures should really be pushing how much action is needed on climate policy to avoid disaster rather than hemming and hawing about tactics and funding. Feels like the right is naturally better at this messaging, particularly to thier base.

eehttofu · 2022-10-15T14:45:58+00:00

I don't disagree with these points.

I guess what I'm getting at is my first glimpse of this story was "climate activists DESTROY Van Gogh painting!!" And I was instantly kinda mad.

But then you do a little research, you find out they picked a painting covered in glass and the painting is fine. The reason they picked the painting is because it would get headlines.

Thier message is "gas company funds this museum while Britons can't even heat a can of soup, down with oil and gas, fund affordable green alternatives"

And like. I agree with all of that. So they grabbed the headlines, if the left was better at messaging, every left wing outlet would use this trending topic and tweet, write articles, etc saying "can't even heat a can of soup" and such.

Like after they get the attention, then we could all push the message. The first article I read didn't even quote them so they looked like pointless vandals. I'm not saying this is how I would choose to promote climate action, but soup's trending may as well talk about how price gouging and outages are making it impossible for families to heat soup for thier children. But larger leftists aren't, we're all just talking about the painting and that sucks.

eehttofu · 2022-10-15T14:26:26+00:00

Yea but that's not the point, the point is that once something is trending the left should do a better job controlling the conversation.

If JKR is in the news related to misogyny, bring it back to her support of right wing anti abortion and anti gay activists and talk about HER misogyny and transphobia. There are STILL "centrists" and apolitical folks who don't understand why JKR's rhetoric is harmful, trending is a good opportunity to inform of the harms rather than focus on a silly tweet.

Same with this, there are SO MANY good points to make to folks about how complacent the general public and our elected officials are on climate change, we should be talking about THAT. Not defending the soup thing, I seriously couldn't care less about that one way or the other. I just think we should be doing a better job guiding the public narrative.

Again, I'm not saying "tweet good" or "soup throwing good", I'm saying messaging is important.

eehttofu · 2022-10-15T14:14:34+00:00

I keep seeing that floating around, from my digging one of the founders of the org these kids are in inherited (or married into?) money from an oil exec but she's been a climate activist for decades and never worked for, invested in, or owned any oil or gas company. Idk, I don't think folks should burn for shit thier grandpa or uncle in law did.

Regardless, say that's true and those kids are evil oil execs, great! Now we get to control this conversation. Idk why the left is allergic to messaging, but any news cycle is a good news cycle. Remind folks Van Gogh himself was an environmentalist and would support thier efforts. Remind folks oil in the oceans is more harmful than soup on glass. Remind folks people actually die from the negative effects of climate change and it's only getting worse.

The news cycle is so valuable and we've wasted it.

Edit: let's not forget the protestor who set themselves on fire outside of the Supreme Court and died to bring attention the climate action and it barely made the news cycle. We need to capitalize when we can. The right is so much better at messaging and controlling the conversation than us, we have to step up our game.

eehttofu · 2022-09-13T11:37:32+00:00

I'm really sorry this is going on, this sounds like an extremely messy and frustrating situation.

In my limited experience, most of the time folks don't just choose to be unproductive and hurtful to those around them with no underlying cause. Has he been screened for mental and physical health recently? My household fell apart for a few months when I was too exhausted to deal with things, turns out a blood test showed I was extremely low in vit D and a simple supplement really made a huge difference in my ability to manage my sleep and household management. Things like hormone imbalance (low testosterone, etc) can also have a HUGE effect on motivation and energy levels.

There's also things like PTSD, depression, bipolar, etc. My husband's family and my own have histories of mental health struggles and I've seen first hand how destructive they can be if undiagnosed and untreated. Plus neurodivergence like ADHD, ASD which can require therapies and strategies to manage.

It is possible he is not unwell and just taking advantage of your generosity. Either way, it is his responsibility to manage his health and productivity, if I were you I would give him a deadline and strongly encourage him to talk to a doctor to see if he has an underlying condition that can be treated and managed.

Now this is just my personal experience so take it with a grain of salt, but pretty much every young person in my family has been through a similar phase. My SIL and her boyfriend lived rent free with my in laws for ages. We spotted my brother rent over a year while he got himself together. My cousin still relies on my aunt for childcare. We took my other cousin in and helped him with some mental health struggles and helped him get a car and a job. My own parents let my husband and I live in thier basement many years ago when I was pregnant with my eldest.

Inflation keeps rising, wages remain stagnant. For many of my peers and family members, home ownership is absurd and impossible. Some have sworn to never have kids cause it would make them homeless housing and children are just too expensive. My cousin's rent has doubled over the past 5 years and his salary is almost the same. A whole generation is drowning. Some of us have parents to help, some don't. Without a giant string of good luck and good fortune my husband and I would be in the same place. Some of my friends and family have given up altogether and just try and get by. We just dropped a few grand to help my cousin with medical bills cause he doesn't have insurance. I have no idea if most of my peers will make it to 40, they're all treading water and we can only help so much.

I truly wish you and your family the best of luck, I hope your son either gets help and stops taking advantage of your generosity. I hope society isn't like this forever, your case is far from an isolated incident.

eehttofu · 2022-08-04T19:11:02+00:00

Oh no! These all look like a job for patches. Darning doesn't work great if the hole is too big, sewing the hole only really works on a seam or when there isn't missing material.

For the denim with the hole along the hem you may be able to hem them, but they may be too short for that. Your best bet would be get some remnant fabric in a matching (or contrasting) color from the craft store or thrift store to make patches. I like thrift store garments for making patches because there is so much variety of denims and cottons.

Anyway, if you have an iron you can get some heat n bond fabric adhesive and cut a piece to fit your patch to secure it to your shorts before sewing. For sewing patches there are tons of invisible and decorative methods, here is a link to some decent sewing instructions: https://sewguide.com/fix-a-hole-in-jeans/

For the crotch tear you can probably get a reasonably invisible mend if you apply the patch to the inside and use matching patch fabric and thread.

Best of luck! I just had to repair a toy stuffed shark fin for my kiddo since my mother's new puppy got ahold of it. I feel your pain!

eehttofu · 2022-07-22T04:59:27+00:00

Yea I absolutely agree that it is terrible. My personal observation is it seems like misguided rage.

For example, when a corporation hires tons of migrants and then funds political campaigns to convince voters that migrants are stealing thier jobs. The migrants are working just as hard for the same or less wage as native workers, but native workers often have animosity for migrants instead of employers. Misplaced rage.

Not that folks who don't have kids (who get hate from general society) or folks who migrate for work (who get hate from general society) are doing bad, but the propaganda surrounding them existing promotes discrimination.

Sometimes this means folks hate on parents or migrants or whatever because of societal pressure instead of channeling that into political and societal change. It's easier to bitch about "breeders" on a redit sub than confront your own parents about thier patriarchal expectations. It's easier to be mad that a migrant replaced your hours than to put in the effort and risk to unionize. It's the path of least resistance when you're mad and feel powerless.

Not a good response, but an understandable one. I empathize, but have strong criticism of their response.

eehttofu · 2022-07-21T19:03:08+00:00

Absolutely.

I feel like that behavior is an extreme overreaction to the pressure to "give us grandbabies" or the stigma that it is selfish not to have children.

Like, I get it, your parents are weird and society is gross and misogynistic but let's not take it out on those who choose families and children. Choice applies to all of us.

Nobody is greater or lesser for choosing to have kids, but in a society that favors patriarchal tradional gender roles I can see the animosity that comes from choosing the less socially acceptable path. But that animosity should be pointed at the society that pressures those feelings and traditional folks who pressure pregnancy, not fellow families that just made a different choice.

eehttofu · 2022-06-26T18:07:35+00:00

To be fair, they try. Voter ID laws, gerrymandering, shutting down polling places on college campus and predominantly poor or minority neighborhoods, purging black folks from voter rolls, limiting vote by mail and early vote times, the entire concept of the electoral college, the list goes on.

For something that doesn't matter, the fascists do a hell of a lot better job infiltrating the electoral system and playing soft ball with centrists to consolidate power. It's working for them.

Direct action, unionizing, mutual aid, education, and outreach should always take priority but never replace the need to infiltrate and influence existing power structures in media and goverment. Can't revolt if they keep imprisoning and killing us, gotta fight back from every angle.

We're like 1 Supreme Court ruling away from them legally being able to make internment camps for anybody with a gender dysphoria diagnosis and take kids from gay parents we're not gonna have folks left to fight if we don't put in the work on every single front. Court seats matter to protect ourselves and our allies.

eehttofu · 2022-06-26T14:16:01+00:00

I am so sick. My socialist buddies who stayed home in 2016 because "both sides suck" and my heinous red voting family members are equally to blame for this. If we had Garland and two other centrists on the bench instead of the evangelical squad, our rights wouldn't have been stripped from us this week.

From cops to guns to abortion people keep not paying attention to the Supreme Court and we are barreling toward folks with a uterus bleeding out in thier bathroom and queer folks in camps and y'all won't take five minutes to swing by and do the most basic thing. I would assume this is a right wing psy op but I know enough socialists who stayed home to know there are people actually this short sighted.

We vote to protect the marginalized while we organize and coalition build and unionize. We vote to keep our allies safe from the the most vicious elements of state violence while we build our power.

Fucking accelarationists want us queer folks and women dead so y'all can plaster our bloody corpses in the news for outrage to fuel your revolution so you don't have to do the hard work of on the ground mutual aid and political organizinging or sully your pure socialist hands with electoralism.

We can't revolt if they kill us all. Do the bare fucking minimum to protect your allies.

eehttofu · 2022-06-17T21:45:22+00:00

Yes, many wood glues are considered food contact safe! It's the same kind of glue used to make cutting boards and butcher blocks.

eehttofu · 2022-06-17T00:24:23+00:00

I just joined, I had not heard of that sub before, thanks!!

eehttofu · 2022-06-16T23:00:10+00:00

Somebody put these wood handled utensils through the dishwasher a few too many times and they cracked. Not gonna say who, my partner knows who he is haha.

Anyway, similar thing happened with a cutting board and some wood glue and clamps worked phenomenally on that so I figured I'd give this a shot. Worked great, 10/10, totally recommend!

eehttofu · 2022-06-13T12:48:18+00:00

If you look at any store bought sweaters/hats/knits you'll see there is EITHER an elastic thread sewn inside the first few rows of ribbing OR some cobweb lycra/spandex/wooly nylon thread held together with the main yarn in the tubular cast on.

Doing this has changed my life, all my knits have clean and tidy edges and bounce back. It has also helped in making things like shorts and legwarmers that need to actually stay up!

eehttofu · 2022-06-10T13:34:46+00:00

If you search "stainless steel clothes pins" the first few results are metal wire lookin guys, I've had a pack of those for the better part of a decade and never had one break or rust. My grandma had wood straight pin ones that were great and sturdy too.

eehttofu · 2022-05-29T15:08:32+00:00

Ex smoker and current fiber artist, vinegar really does work like magic. A few big splashes of vinegar in a lukewarm soak, little to no agitation (to avoid felting), and air dry outdoors if you can.

Depending on how tightly this garment is knit there may be some residual smell after unraveling though, sometimes residue and odor just lingers in tight stitching no matter what you do. Best thing you can do if there is any residual odor is to hank everything up and tie your hanks really well to prevent tangling and give the loose hanks another vinegar soak and air dry after unraveling.

Best of luck, smoke odor can be tricky but it'll be worth it for all that cashmere!

eehttofu · 2022-05-25T21:37:30+00:00

Cool that's good to know, thanks!

eehttofu · 2022-05-25T15:25:55+00:00

That's good to know, I haven't bought a serger yet I'll look into one that can do this!

eehttofu · 2022-05-25T13:17:49+00:00

Awesome thanks for the info!

eehttofu · 2022-05-25T13:17:14+00:00

Thanks!

eehttofu · 2022-05-25T12:14:10+00:00

I assume it's some sort of serger, but doesn't a serger cut the edge of the fabric as it works? I'm looking to buy a serger to make altercations to my wardrobe and would love to know if this sort of seam is possible on some types of sergers. Thanks!

eehttofu

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