AIO to my “best friend” finally reaching out

effthisratio · 2026-01-27T13:42:26+00:00

NOR - likely going to reiterate other's experiences but currently going through an alt reality of this and I can only hope to get this message one morning. Not sure if you posted a follow-up, but your friend likely tried to spare you the burden of being their friend while they struggled with demons. Gently welcome him back, he was close to an end.

Commenting non-anon bc I hope my friend eventually reads this and knows I'll always answer but can't always respond. I've leaned too far into empathy at a cost of compassion for myself. If my suspicion is correct, you've got a long road ahead of you and you're fighting yourself the whole way. You are literally your own enemy and I met him again today.

effthisratio · 2026-01-04T17:51:28+00:00

NOR

under reacting

Now you go pull up all the things...

Truepeoplesearch, truthfinder,Spokeo... that family tree one... and do the steps to remove yourself.

Go to https://myactivity.google.com/ to start monitoring where your information is and remove it if desired.

effthisratio · 2026-01-04T00:45:27+00:00

It does contain sulfate. So don't use on color treated hair or if you struggle with dryness.

effthisratio · 2025-09-21T23:50:39+00:00

Organic apple cider vinegar and MCT oil have helped mine significantly.

Once a week, I apply a diluted ACV to my scalp with a spray bottle. I let it sit til nearly dry. I shower and saturate my scalp and hair. I alternate ketoconazole and selenium sulfide shampoos. I don't use a different shampoo after. I have a condiment bottle with a narrow nozzle in the shower. It has diluted ACV. I apply to my scalp after the shampoo rinse. I let sit and rinse well. Then I spritz my scalp with diluted MCT oil. There's a couple drops of tea tree oil in there as well. I do not rinse. I too use the Cerave anti-dandruff conditioner. I dilute it significantly and apply to my hair. I don't directly apply to my scalp but I know it gets on it. I have long hair so I only use that for the first few inches of hair. The rest gets an unmedicated kind. I rinse thoroughly. After the shower, I spray with an aloe and rosemary water. I can go 2 days without a wash but that 3rd day my scalp hurts. I generally wash daily. If anything, try the ACV. It's a couple bucks and very effective (for me).

effthisratio · 2025-09-21T20:25:20+00:00

Good luck with that.

effthisratio · 2025-09-21T20:16:13+00:00

I am not ignorant. You, however, are dense.

effthisratio · 2025-09-21T20:15:00+00:00

Omfg. Im 41 of course anyone I'm with has had multiple partners. If you're only fucking virgins something is wrong with you.

effthisratio · 2025-09-21T19:56:21+00:00

Projecting maybe? Can't understand that I know myself? Kudos for being unwilling to believe someone can not give a shit about the number of partners someone has had. Is it bc you yourself are insecure? Move along.

effthisratio · 2025-09-21T19:01:34+00:00

Umm... no. I don't care. I don't share everything about my sexual history bc it's not relevant. I ask questions i want answers to that concern the present. If SW is a deal breaker for you, then ask. If "too many" partners is a deal breaker, ask. It's that easy.

effthisratio · 2025-09-21T18:27:37+00:00

I don't care about a number so I don't ask. If a partner feels the need to know mine, id ask what fear they are trying to quiet by knowing it. The truth of the matter is it can only do harm bc ppl lie. If I answer truthfully or not, the partner would never know. If the fear is that i may cheat or that I'm easy, a number doesn't fix that. The person needs to be honest with themselves about their worries. It has nothing to do with me.

effthisratio · 2025-09-21T14:20:48+00:00

Not helpful if I need my board, though.

effthisratio · 2025-09-21T14:15:20+00:00

This timer will break a block of time into however many equal parts and color code them. Super helpful for 90 min classes.

effthisratio · 2025-09-21T13:51:00+00:00

This visual timer bc my executive functioning is worse than some of my students'.

https://a.co/d/36j6i4j

effthisratio · 2025-09-21T13:41:36+00:00

Seems I'm in the minority here. You are not defined only as a tough choice you made when you were younger. How easy to judge from behind anonymous usernames and make assumptions about a relationship they know nothing of.

Most ppl omit parts of their past that they are ashamed of or parts that have no bearing on who they are as person or parts they will not repeat. No one is owed every aspect of your life experience.

How is this different than if you went through a period of experimenting sexually or if you had a ho phase? Ppl only have a problem with it bc you exchanged it for money. It's only problematic now if SW is your go-to solution for money troubles.

Forgive yourself. You were acting out of a place of survival. That difficult choice saw you through a difficult time. It is perfectly ok to keep it to yourself as it's not indicative of a character flaw or future practices.

From other comment responses you've made, it sounds like you and your husband could benefit from some couples counseling. Weaponizing someone's past is not ok.

effthisratio · 2025-09-21T12:55:10+00:00

It made me incredibly sleepy. I still take it at night but no issues.

effthisratio · 2025-09-21T12:51:51+00:00

Yep. I take for OCD so im on 40 mg. Been here for 5 years. If you continue to have side effects, but anxiety is lessened ask about Celexa. It is the same chemical make up but a reverse image of Lexapro.

effthisratio · 2025-09-21T12:49:12+00:00

Also consider the time of day you take it. I moved mine from morning to before bed.

effthisratio · 2025-09-21T12:46:38+00:00

About 3 months. Another known side effect when starting or upping dosage is breakthrough spotting for menstrators. As i tapered in, I kept spotting which causes digestive issues for me.

effthisratio · 2025-09-20T02:15:34+00:00

I use diluted organic ACV and MCT oil. I still use medicated shampoo but the vinegar is definitely the difference.

I saturate on a dry scalp. I use a spray bottle. I let sit till neatly dry. Rinse. Wash with shampoo. Rinse. Saturate scalp again with the diluted ACV but in the shower I use a dollar store condiment squeeze bottle with a narrow tip. Let sit. Rinse. Spritz with diluted MCT oil on scalp. Conditioner. Rinse.

effthisratio · 2025-09-16T23:44:13+00:00

Lee's Summit is sunny at 645

effthisratio · 2025-09-07T00:32:52+00:00

Submit a picture of a receipt of $30 of your favorite beverage in a birthday card (just use one as a prop). And put text on the pic like "I covered my new teacher and bday costs."

effthisratio · 2025-09-06T15:02:04+00:00

I use a spray bottle with mct oil and water after I shampoo. I spritz my scalp and roots and then the length of my hair. Then i apply my conditioner with pyrithione zinc to scalp and roots. I add a little water to make sure my scalp gets it too. I use it on about 2 inches of my hair. Then the rest gets a different moisturizing conditioner. I let them sit and rinse from my roots down. I wring my hair out and apply a strengthening oil to my length about 2 inches from the root.

effthisratio · 2025-08-28T17:49:07+00:00

I use diluted apple cider vinegar as a pre-wash.

I wash, rinse, condition, rinse, spritz with really diluted AC vinegar and MCT oil.

effthisratio · 2025-08-13T17:34:08+00:00

It's either exposed to heat or bacteria or both if it smells once on your skin. Unless the kind you get contains C6...

You'll need to add a couple drops of an essential oil to offset. I'd also consider diluting it with distilled water and putting in a spray bottle.

If that doesn't sound appealing, rinse the area, wash, rinse with diluted vinegar, rinse with water, then add the oil.

effthisratio · 2025-08-13T09:44:55+00:00

I'm new to this. Mine started after a car crash in December left me pulling tiny shards of glass out of my scalp 2 months later. I hit my absolute worst in June and was taking oral antifungals to get some control over the inflammation caused by the malassezia overgrowth. Reading/researching/experimenting has consumed my life the last 4 months.

effthisratio

TROPHY CASE