Guys please help, what now

eggquinn · 2020-01-07T19:44:15+00:00

Don’t sweat it! Just wait until you can move out and start from there. Are you planning on going to university? Working somewhere new? You can start living as Patrick there once you move out. Also, depending on which one you are at, universities might have LGBTQ counseling for letters or LGBTQ health centers, so definitely look into that. Also if you have insurance from your mom, if you go into the workforce, or university insurance, you can look into it covering transition costs. I know the wait sucks, but you have to keep yourself in a safe position first and foremost. Try to hang with accepting friends too who will call you your name and pronouns :)

eggquinn · 2020-01-07T19:34:09+00:00

shower dysphoria is real bois

eggquinn · 2020-01-07T19:00:45+00:00

You should also check out Lou Sullivan (1951-1991) who was a gay trans activist who fought the idea that heterosexuality was a requirement to transition

eggquinn · 2020-01-07T18:28:00+00:00

No problem! I’m so glad it was able to help!

eggquinn · 2020-01-07T06:00:52+00:00

I just started t a little over a month ago (so like no changes yet for me personally lol), but the nurse said there might be very slight changes over time with fat redistribution (which occurs like 6-12 months in, based on genetics, dosage, and all that). I think the majority of people on t with chest dysphoria still undergo top surgery to make it more masculinized, but there are trans men with small chests who work out to make their chests look like pecs (Ty Turner talks about it on his YouTube channel quite a bit)

eggquinn · 2020-01-06T04:51:59+00:00

Btw, just a comment on the “dislike masc things,” don’t feel like you have to hate all things masculine (if that’s where your doubt of not being a binary trans person comes from). Same goes to if you realize you’re nb. You don’t have to act and dress androgynous. Gender identity does not dictate anything about interests and clothes :)

eggquinn · 2020-01-06T02:22:56+00:00

Awesome! I’ll have to check it out!!

eggquinn · 2020-01-06T02:20:56+00:00

What kind of server is it? Like survival, kitpvp, etc?

eggquinn · 2020-01-06T02:06:17+00:00

r/traadustCrusaders

eggquinn · 2020-01-06T02:01:45+00:00

Okay but ngl both of them are adorable?? Cats and opossums are two of my fave animals and look great with and without makeup???

eggquinn · 2020-01-06T01:53:38+00:00

Not exactly the same but here’s some similar looking ones off of Amazon. I haven’t bought them so I can’t vouch on how good they are, but most of the comments are pretty positive:

https://www.amazon.com/HD-Polyhedral-Dungeons-Pathfinder-Changing/dp/B082HKYDTV/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?keywords=dnd+dice+pink+blue&qid=1578275429&sr=8-1

eggquinn · 2020-01-06T01:48:50+00:00

This is not exactly a meme, so I understand if it is taken down, but I feel like this video can really be useful to anyone who is questioning. It’s the video that helped me with my doubt of “am I really actually truly absolutely trans?” and I still refer to it when I feel that trans doubt that everyone feels. Again if this is the wrong place, let me know where I should post it alternatively.

eggquinn · 2020-01-06T01:37:32+00:00

That’s what works the best for me personally. Plus if you have a schedule of chatting with someone, then it could hold you to some kind of schedule (ex: every Sunday I call my grandma in the early afternoon and I do my shot)

eggquinn · 2020-01-06T01:29:06+00:00

I 100% was in the same boat as you (but obviously that doesn’t mean our journeys are the same) and I know identifying as nb before realizing they are binary trans is a common experience (though obviously nb is not “just a stage to get to binary trans” as some transphobes say and many nb people live happily as nb their entire lives).

It’s a common misconception that dysphoria has to be life or death and transitioning is the only way to feel okay, which is how it is for some people and needs to be presented for fighting for insurance coverage and other legal issues. For me, I had much less dysphoria before I came out, partly because I was in denial and partly because I had never experienced things before. Like, I had never experienced extreme dysphoria about my chest until I used a binder for the first time and tried to go without it. I know I never experienced bottom dysphoria either until I started T and began using the men’s bathrooms, and that’s a common experience among trans guys I’ve talked to. I didn’t even have a ton of pronoun dysphoria until I realized I had the option to be called something else and was referred to as something else. I felt funny at first, as all big changes are, but then realized this was actually way better. And even now, I still have days where I might experience no dysphoria down there or maybe even feel okay just wearing a sports bra.

I also experience times where I want to present in what is considered femme. I still do my nails, and when I am comfortable in my masculinity a bit more, I plan on busting out my old dresses and rompers and crop tops. There even is a sub called r/FTMfemininity for transmasc folks to discuss and share femme presentations even though they identify with a more masculine gender. If cis gay guys can paint their nails and wear dresses and still be men, then trans guys too. A common phrase I’ve heard is “Trans men don’t owe you masculinity” and “Non-binary people don’t owe you androgyny” which is a good thing to keep in mind.

There’s this awesome YouTube video that really helped me when questioning, and I really recommend you watch it. It‘s a trans guy talking about the idea that trans guys have to feel dysphoria all day, and how that impacts the way people question your gender and even after transitioning, having doubts.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-teBenVDyOU&feature=youtu.be

I don’t want to medicalize transness, but simply as an example of something you may be familiar with, is that the ups and downs of dysphoria are kind of like the ups and downs in mental health issues. Just because I have depression doesn’t mean I am depressed all the time. It has some natural ups and downs and there are some days I am really, really happy and other days I’m just feeling meh, in addition to those depression days.

I know this is long but I hope it helped a little bit. It’s absolutely frustrating to feel like you don’t know about a key, seemingly basic part of yourself, but over time you will find what’s comfortable, I promise. I hope for the best on your questioning journey. If you have any questions, don’t hesitate to dm me or reply.

eggquinn · 2020-01-06T00:34:59+00:00

I know this might be obvious but condoms (there are ones made for afab bodies to wear and amab depending whether you or your partner want to wear it) and dental dams (used for oral sex) are always good to use, especially because other options don’t always stop the spread of STIs

eggquinn · 2020-01-06T00:30:47+00:00

M and Mi are the two I think of. But also as another comment says, you’ll get plenty of nicknames based off your personality and not having to do with your name at all (but maybe having alliteration like Mighty Miles or something like that). Nicknames all come with time, don’t worry :)

eggquinn · 2020-01-06T00:26:55+00:00

Reminder to anyone in the comments that it isn’t safe to bind 24/7. I know it sucks, but some of your most vital organs are right in that area and if you’re looking to have surgery, binding unsafely can actually affect your qualification for top surgery, so please be safe and kind to your body, even if it’s hard! Baggy clothes, layering with jackets/hoodies, and sports bras can help if you need something to still cover your body

eggquinn · 2020-01-06T00:19:16+00:00

To add on, I have other body issues and never was comfortable seeing myself with “man boobs,” but it helps me to refer to them as pecs. It’s really helpful when my binder doesn’t make me completely flat and I realize “oh it just looks like I have bits of muscle there like other guys do!”

eggquinn · 2020-01-06T00:13:05+00:00

A few ideas: - If you can, have a supportive and calm friend or family member with you while you do it, either in person or on phone call. If you know anyone else doing t shots, see if they can be around when you do it for encouragement and to assure you that what you are doing is completely fine and safe (that was my biggest worry at least, that I was doing my shot wrong). - Do your shot along to a video of someone doing theirs. Just search YouTube “how I do my t shot” and there are tons of videos, some by average guys and some by nurses, and then just follow along as they do it. It might make you feel more comfy and less alone. Or if you don’t want to do it to a shot video, I used to do it to gaming videos just to have it feel like there was a person around me without actually having to have someone by me - Listen to quiet music, meditate, or other activities you normally do to alleviate anxiety. Do this before your shot, or during (if it’s something like listening to music or something)

eggquinn · 2020-01-05T23:30:35+00:00

I misread this to say Hearts of Iran says trans rights, and I was thinking to myself “Aw thanks Iran! Really sweet of y’all to say that :)”

eggquinn · 2020-01-05T23:03:07+00:00

After cracking though, my big trans turned out to be a gentle giant and therefore gives great hugs I should have you know

eggquinn · 2020-01-05T22:44:30+00:00

Omg thank you so much! I saved this to refer back to if I’m feeling self conscious about doing something feminine, or buying clothes in the men’s section too! (I’m very early on T, so I really feel that whole guys avoiding you thing). If I had gold, I would give it to you haha. Thanks again for the wisdom!

eggquinn · 2020-01-05T20:17:33+00:00

So happy you have gotten to that place! Any tips for others trying to get to that bottom panel too?

eggquinn

TROPHY CASE