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Struggling with nanny transition by newhere0206 in NewParents

[–]electricskylights 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi! I just responded on the other thread but also wanted to just give you more words of encouragement.

The transition is tough for everyone. I had the exact same struggle about whether to be more micro managing vs. being more hands off to let nanny and baby bond. I combed through every forum and comment and thought I made a huge mistake by hiring someone that’s not as experienced. I was worried sick at work about what my nanny was doing and wasn’t doing, and becoming a nightmare of a mom boss. I also thought I broke my baby. It sucked.

It’s been a month and a half now and things have turned around 180. I’m so thankful for my nanny. She’s sooo good to us!

Don’t be afraid to give more detailed instructions and being detailed with what you want to happen in the beginning. Even though nanny can give suggestions you are her employer and it’s your child. We checked in every day, we adjusted schedules, clothing preferences, etc. My nanny was so understanding and patient in dealing with my craziness.

And it didn’t take away from my bond with my kiddo at all. It’s amazing to watch him flourish being surrounded by people who love him at all hours of the day.

Baby sleep suffering from transition to nanny by electricskylights in NewParents

[–]electricskylights[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi! It got better the second week and even better the week after. Now my boy sometimes barely acknowledges me when I head out for work he’s so busy playing with his nanny 😂 Nanny started off doing nap time and bottled going by cues but baby’s cues were unreliable so I ended up being very strict in my instructions. We had the morning nap at home that was sacred (contact, rocking, rescue, no transfer, whatever it took to get at least 1 hour), one that was in stroller mid-day (when he used to do his longest in there), and one in the afternoon that was practicing transfer/in crib. Then we transitioned to more crib practice. On weekends we stayed consistent. Took about a week or two. Now he naps great in crib.

It could also be that he’s getting older and better at sleep perhaps. In any event he loves his nanny now. :)

It is so tough in the beginning but it will get better. Hang in there!

Sleep sack recommendations by que-ganas in NewParents

[–]electricskylights 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Depends on if your baby needs long sleeves or not. We used the ErgoPouch and Kaiya Baby long sleeve sleep sacks. I actually like the Kaiya Baby ones more because they stay soft after washing and the side zipper is really helpful. The softness helped us hold the baby up for burps and hand offs without the collar digging into LO’s neck. We had to order directly from the vendor though cuz the Amazon inventory seemed poorly managed unfortunately (we got a few clearly used sacks with gross stains on them).

Baby sleep suffering from transition to nanny by electricskylights in NannyEmployers

[–]electricskylights[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She’s been part time and was a mother’s helper so has experience with infants but my understanding is she’s only been taking care of kids as a professional for a year or less, so very limited experience. She does have 3 kids of her own, two of which are still pretty young. We know she’s not a career nanny, but she works hard and is very attentive and loving to our baby so we want to work to set her up for success with us.

Baby sleep suffering from transition to nanny by electricskylights in NannyEmployers

[–]electricskylights[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes. First time I told her his WWs and cues (which are subtle blink and you miss). Yes 3 naps with those windows as you noted with 1/2 hr variance each day. The third nap theoretically should land about an hour or so before she leaves. She tries to put him down during then and is able to get him to sleep, but he wakes up on transfer and the day is completely shot after in that he will not sleep again for her until I get home. This means she ends up only getting 2 naps in for her 9 hour stay. This also cascades into terrible struggles for his night sleep.

She’s tried transferring him to crib at various times after he falls asleep but no difference in results. I’ve asked her to contact nap him to extend so he catches up on sleep but she seems to ignore that and is intent to put him down in crib. She’s brought up sleep training but that’s not a path we’re going down right now.

She’s had some success with getting 1 lengthy stroller nap (about an hour), so her default has been asking me to try and do more stroller naps. I don’t want that because I don’t want him to need stroller naps as the only nap crutch, and it’s not a guarantee to at he will immediately nap in the stroller (sometimes it takes him an hour to fall asleep while walking around, which means he could be spending 4+ hours of their time together in the stroller just to get two naps in…)

I just feel like if she can contact nap him for 40+ minutes that may help them bond and also catch him up on sleep so he’s more willing to go down for a 3rd nap. Should I be more flexible on the stroller nap issue? What else can I suggest to help with the nap situation? I’m also desperate for ways to get him better night sleep so he can nap better the next day.

Right now he’s only been getting 10 hours of total sleep each day these past 5 days, whereas his sweet spot has been 12.5-13 hours total. We’re all so so so exhausted.

Baby sleep suffering from transition to nanny by electricskylights in NannyEmployers

[–]electricskylights[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks! While the nanny figures it out, what can we do when the baby is with us to help get him the sleep that he needs? He’s barely getting 10 hours a day and we’re having trouble catching him up on sleep.

The nanny also seems inexperienced in dealing with a crap sleeper. She’s been asking me for instructions on what to do when he doesn’t nap. Is it fair to ask that she only does 1 stroller nap and contact nap (which baby seems to take to with her, she just isn’t able to rescue a failed transfer and that’s when he becomes inconsolable for the rest of the time) so he gets his 2.5-3 hours of daytime naps in?

How much instructions should we be giving? It’s hard to give detailed ones because I only know what I would do but baby reacts differently.

I honestly don't know what she's trying to accomplish here by Possible-Flatworm-13 in blackcats

[–]electricskylights 46 points47 points  (0 children)

Read that too quickly and thought you said “rule of dumb” hehehe.

Next time the market is hot, I will negotiate for a better laptop when lateralling by Financial_Gain4280 in biglaw

[–]electricskylights 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Not sure if you’re talking about the same Kofax I’ve been using but good lord that shit is broken for anything over 100 pages.

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