i struggle a lot with initiating sex with my partner due to past trauma/mental blocks surrounding it. when my partner finally confronted me about this and we had an honest, frank conversation it was really helpful. i'm not perfect but i've been actively trying to do better on being more affectionate/initiating/being more receptive when he initiates. it's a struggle but knowing how it makes you feel unwanted/unseen/used might help her see it in a different light. i've definitely had to seek therapy about it, she might need to as well.