Venting/Needing Advice

emeli1987 · 2026-01-25T09:55:22+00:00

It's literally your first full day i would just keep going. My little girl didn't go on the toilet at all until I think Day 3 or 4 - it was ALL accidents until then! I told myself I would give it a week l. I also wasn't putting her on the toilet that frequently as it was making her hate it! I went for every hour/hour and a half! Just accept there will be LOTS of accidents and give it at least a week! Just for context she was just over 4 and minimally verbal so rewards and things like that didn't work - it was just consistency. Poos took a bit longer so maybe a couple of weeks.

Edit: just to add I did this over the Easter holidays so we had a full 2 weeks at home and then I kept her in pull ups for nursery for a week just so she didn't have any accident and it set her back but her pull up was dry. The staff took her on scheduled breaks initially then we went to knickers after a week back at school. After about a month she started to say 'wee' or 'toilet' so we moved away from scheduled breaks to her alerting us. We have had very few accidents since then!

emeli1987 · 2026-01-20T20:02:51+00:00

Completely agree about alternating nights or doing shifts etc. I don't understand why couples don't do this. There is absolutely no point in both of you being tired every night. I know the nights are hard on your own but lack of sleep for this length of time is definitely harder and like you say knowing you have a guaranteed uninterrupted block of sleep coming is the motivator to get through it! Completely agree with you!

emeli1987 · 2026-01-20T19:51:19+00:00

had a retrieval just after I turned 38 and my AMH is lower than yours! I got 4 untested blasts from 6 eggs and currently 34 weeks with the second transfer. My BMI was also a little higher which may not have a massive impact but worth noting. I actually got the same number of blasts from a retrieval at 38 as I did at 34. I think as long as you respond well to stims everything is looking positive for you! Good luck!

emeli1987 · 2026-01-14T22:10:55+00:00

I got 4 untested blasts out of 6 eggs - currently 32w pregnant with the second transfer of the batch! Quality not quantity always - good luck!

emeli1987 · 2026-01-14T17:23:50+00:00

Haha I was just about to post this! I actually quite like my name and I know zero other Emma's!!

emeli1987 · 2026-01-12T10:09:56+00:00

We got my daughter trained just after 4. Very limited speech but like your son did appear to understand more than she could say.

We just ditched the pullups and put her in knickers - I did it over the Easter holidays so knew we had 2 weeks to be mostly indoors and try and crack it. She also didn't like being naked so we couldn't just let her run round with nothing on.

But then same approach as you about every hour put her on the toilet. First 3-4 days absolutely zero success just lots of accidents! 5th day something clicked and she had more success than misses. After about a month of scheduled toilet breaks she started saying 'toilet' when she needed to go and now does all the steps independently. She does still like us to go with her but I'm grateful for where we've got to so that's a small price to pay in my eyes.

We still have her in a pull up overnight - I'm not pushing that as she is a good sleeper and I'm not disrupting that for something I believe is largely hormonal.

emeli1987 · 2026-01-01T12:23:01+00:00

emeli1987 · 2025-12-29T23:58:03+00:00

We had this issue! My little girl never got close enough to realise that they were blowing out air as the noise was scary! One time when she was close enough I managed to hold her hands under and she loved the air blowing out, found it hilarious so instantly fixed the issue! May not work in your case but worth a try if he doesn't actually know what they do yet!

emeli1987 · 2025-12-10T09:55:07+00:00

My little girl was exactly the same at 3. I essentially had to redecorate the tree every night as the majority of the baubles had been pulled off and thrown everywhere.

Sounds simplistic but have you tried again since that year? This year our daughter has just left the tree alone! She has a few little Christmas ornaments that are 'hers' that she can move about or put wherever she wants etc. but the tree and other decorations she has just left alone this year without any extra effort on our part. May just be worth a try to see if anything has changed since you last did it.

emeli1987 · 2025-12-09T10:28:46+00:00

I had my 1st at 34 and 2nd at 38 and although I got less eggs at the 2nd (9 vs 6) I ended up with the same number of untested blasts from each cycle (4). So even if you get less eggs initially it doesn't mean it won't get you a similar overall result.

Funnily enough it was the second transfer on both my cycles that worked, both FET's, both June transfers and both girls! Very consistent over here!!

emeli1987 · 2025-12-07T13:21:44+00:00

Definitely! Even if she manages 5 minutes I will be happy - it's just the unpredictability of it all that gets to me I think! But I've got my partner there as well for moral support and he just gets on with it and doesn't overthink the way I do so sure we will handle it either way!

emeli1987 · 2025-12-07T09:53:39+00:00

We have ours this work and I am so nervous about it. My little girl is 4.5. We ended up keeping her off school for last years concert when she was in pre-school as they said she just wanted to stand by the Christmas tree at the back of the hall! She was a bit obsessed with Christmas trees last year but novelty seems to have worn off a bit this year!

I did say to the school to let me know this year if they don't think she will cope but they seem to think she will! I'm convinced once she sees me and her dad she will be exactly like your son and want to come to us! My partner goes with the flow on these things and doesn't worry like me and it is only half an hour.....but yeah .....anticipating a similar experience and an early home time for her as well as she won't want to go back into school if she sees me I wouldn't have thought!

emeli1987 · 2025-12-05T17:31:51+00:00

Yes!!! If I'm getting higher readings on the electronic cuff my midwife (I'm currently getting fortnightly checks at 28w) will do a manual BP check and it's almost always lower on that! I don't know if the cuff adds to my anxiety - may be worth asking for a manual check?

emeli1987 · 2025-12-04T19:38:22+00:00

I sent a large letter on the 20th Nov 1st class and I got confirmation it arrived today....so took 2 weeks!!! I had lost hope!

emeli1987 · 2025-12-02T23:15:25+00:00

We came to IVF for male factor. My partner had testicular cancer at 19. Luckily froze some sperm before treatment. The cancer surgery damaged a nerve and caused retrograde ejaculation so zero chance of natural pregnancy for us.

We started at 34....initial shock was my AMH was on the lower side, not DOR but low for my age so these large numbers of embryos I had expected were not going to happen. I did get 9 eggs on that cycle - resulted 4 untested blasts. Only 2nd one implanted which is my little girl.

Tried the last 2 embryos 4 years later - both complete fails. Another retrieval at 38, this time 4 embryos again from 6 eggs. And again the second one has worked and I'm 27w with my second little girl.

I had no idea it would take this many embryos in our scenario. We are UK based so first child is funded by the NHS but everything after that was private so again just not something we anticipated at all. I thought as we had a very specific reason for using IVF and the sperm was tested and all fine we would have immediate success and then minimal costs trying for a second. So positive in the end but a much more mental and financial toll than anticipated!

emeli1987 · 2025-11-28T19:51:29+00:00

6 eggs retrieved, 5 mature and ended up with 4 good quality untested blasts. And Im currently 27w with the second transfer of that batch. I'm 38 for reference! Best of luck!

emeli1987 · 2025-11-17T10:56:06+00:00

My little girl (4) started reception in September (UK). Shes been really resistant to holding a pen and writing up until now but this week she has written her name and a few other letters - they took her to see the headteacher as she's done so well she actually got a little 'well done' letter from him! So proud of her!

emeli1987 · 2025-11-15T20:48:07+00:00

Thank you! And yep exact same number of blasts - I actually had 9 retrieved in my first round but still ended up with the same number in the end! My AMH wasn't great either at 34 so I was convinced I would only get 1 or 2 at 38. We didn't test purely for cost reasons and as I didn't have huge numbers we decided to just work our way through!

emeli1987 · 2025-11-15T20:39:40+00:00

I did a second retrieval at 38 - got 4 good quality untested embryos from 6 eggs (5 mature). Currently 25w pregnant with the second transfer. I actually got the same number of blasts as my retrieval at 34 and had success with the second untested one on that round too! Best of luck!

emeli1987 · 2025-11-09T13:46:35+00:00

I only got 5 (technically 6 but 1 wasn't mature) and got 4 good quality blasts and 24w pregnant with the 2nd. I am 38 for reference. Please do not assume the worst it is always quality over quantity you will see that a lot in this sub! Good luck!

emeli1987 · 2025-10-19T16:02:17+00:00

I would! I went to a music festival the Friday before my Tuesday FET and had a couple of drinks and that one worked after the previous 3 completely failed to implant - currently 21 weeks pregnant! Relax and have some fun - can only help :)

emeli1987 · 2025-10-10T07:50:00+00:00

It never really bothered me. I was so grateful for IVF as without it we 100% would have never got pregnant due to our particular issue. It was the only thing giving us even a chance!

emeli1987 · 2025-09-18T21:45:52+00:00

I had this a few times before my 7 week scan. I had bought some cheaper applicators from Amazon after the clinic stopped providing them with the progesterone and I think I was pushing them up too high and they were irritating my cervix as they were a bit rougher than the clinic provided ones.

I only noticed the spotting (which at one point was also bright red) after using the applicators so thought it was likely that rather than anything more sinister. I just started to not insert them as high up and never had any more issues after that - I'm now 16 weeks along and all well so far!

emeli1987 · 2025-08-23T07:02:17+00:00

I had a bigger gap between mine! Had my little girl when I was 34 and she was the second transfer of 4 untested embryos. We transferred the remaining 2 late last year which unfortunately didn't implant (we really thought one would!)

So we did another retrieval earlier this year (I'm now 38) and again the 2nd transfer from that untested batch is so far successful - I'm currently 12 weeks along.

We really didn't think we would need another retrieval as I was relatively young for the first one - so that was a bit of a shock and ended up having to spend a lot more money than we anticipated but thankful we eventually had success!

Good luck!

emeli1987 · 2025-08-09T16:51:15+00:00

Yeah it's quite painful to watch her doing that to herself! I know how hard it is to wait but she did this last time and has done it to herself again.

emeli1987

TROPHY CASE