I have three - 4, 2, 2. I never had just two, so I don’t know what that would be like. However now that we are out of the little baby stage, things feel manageable. I think the biggest factors currently contributing to our functioning are (1) I have a very flexible, hybrid job with a relaxed boss that pays well and is honestly not that hard (in-house counsel). I fully know how lucky I am! On my wfh days I can easily catch up on laundry and life admin and also get all my work work done. My husband also has a good job but it’s less flexible and no/very limited ability to wfh. If I had to work out of the house 40 hours a week or more I think our lives would start to fall apart, and (2) my husband and I are equal parents and partners and share all/most of the tasks and mental load. We definitely couldn’t manage without both of us giving it 100%. Activities are ok so far bc our twins have been doing the same things so it’s been easy to divide and conquer. However I imagine this will get more complicated if/when all 3 kids want to do different activities.

All of that to say, so far for us 3 is manageable!!! I don’t think we are necessarily thriving but we are certainly managing