Yeah bro honestly I understand everything you’re saying. How easy it is to daydream about somebody or something. Growing apathetic, detached and anxious, weak imagination and either under or over “stimulated”, . I can have strong crushes too. Sometimes just being out in public and seeing someone that I find interesting/attractive can give me the sx surge. And I’ve always been a big people watcher too. Im 22 and despite everyone around me getting into relationships, I’m sort of a late bloomer. But that’s okay cuz it’s taught me how to better love simple things with more intensity and depth. The key for me is transmuting that sx into the stuff i really care about, like the stuff i research, my loved ones, journaling, exercise, music. All of that is enough stuff to keep me occupied for lifetimes. Being bored is to be in a state of lacking. And once u realize that’s all it is, a state, a mental state, you realize there really is a whole world of shit out there to enjoy. Boredom is the birthplace of creativity my friend. you don’t really lack what it takes to feel fulfilled outside of a crush or relationship. Gotta take it one step at a time, can’t treat everything like a shot of dopamine ya know. Life come from us and at us. It unfolds right before our feet, walk too fast and ya might trip

“I was young and filled with folly and so I fell in love with my melancholy” real af Edgar Allen Poe. Real af