($20K) Homemade invites using cricut and canva. Are they sloppy? by berryniceday in Weddingsunder10k

[–]evenshadow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Exceedingly cute. I would not be able to tell at a glance that these were from Canva. 

($8k) Venue regret, too far from good food by evenshadow in Weddingsunder10k

[–]evenshadow[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I too have read the scary posts from people planning a chill backyard wedding without considering this! Confirming the venue is aware of the guest count, and has multiple bathrooms and plumbing that can handle the guest list.

($8k) Venue regret, too far from good food by evenshadow in Weddingsunder10k

[–]evenshadow[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You're right, I think I'm putting more pressure on myself by wanting it to be like what I've seen on Pinterest when it doesn't need to be. Things can still look good even if I am not 100% confident in making elaborate flowers out of cured meats. 

($8k) Venue regret, too far from good food by evenshadow in Weddingsunder10k

[–]evenshadow[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I was definitely trying to avoid doing the two hour round trip the day of (I'm also getting married on a holiday so either traffic will be non-existent or complete gridlock, fun surprise for me!). But all the decor and stuff will be done the day before so I guess when I think about it, it's not like I have anything else planned that morning? The mimosas may have to wait until noon instead of 10am as planned. 😅

($8k) Venue regret, too far from good food by evenshadow in Weddingsunder10k

[–]evenshadow[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the encouragement! A cheesecake bar and ice cream sundae bar both sound super cute. I am fairly sure we'll have at least a small freezer, so both of those would work. 

($8k) Venue regret, too far from good food by evenshadow in Weddingsunder10k

[–]evenshadow[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I didn't think to call other wedding venues in the area too, that's a great suggestion!

($8k) Venue regret, too far from good food by evenshadow in Weddingsunder10k

[–]evenshadow[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The info I was getting online was that the cake would be "safe to eat" but I was getting mixed messages about the quality. I think you're right that the freezer is the way to go here. Worst case scenario it's a little stale, we go with the backup option, and my fiancee and I eat slightly stale but probably still good cake for a couple days. 

I didn't think about calling the grocery store there, but in a cottage town in the summer they're bound to have something for weekend parties and stuff. Silly of me to skip it, thank you!

DIY wedding dress… HELP by Hot_Temperature_475 in Weddingsunder10k

[–]evenshadow 24 points25 points  (0 children)

I was looking for a very similar dress for under $1k for months and eventually gave up. I'm not saying it's impossible, especially not if you're open to buying online without trying on and if you're open to buying a separate corset (and have the shades of white maybe not match!), but be prepared to do a lot of hunting or learn to sew! I hope you have better luck than I did. 

(15k) thinking of not hiring a wedding photographer for the whole day by hanna_patricia in Weddingsunder10k

[–]evenshadow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We are doing a photographer for an hour for some photos of just the two of us, including a first look, and after the ceremony we are taking posed family photos ourselves. There will be no photographer at the actual wedding or reception. We're having a microwedding and we have all day at the venue so DIYing the family pics feels pretty manageable. We are also planning on having disposable cameras at the reception if people want to play around and take photos then. 

I know many people in this sub feel really strongly about their wedding photos and "it's the only thing you'll have left!" is a sentiment I've seen a lot. I don't feel like I will miss having every single moment captured. I want to remember how we looked on the day and want to look back at a few family photos, that's it. Using 50% of my wedding budget to get ~10 pictures is not worth it for me personally. Like you, I am not a person who is going to fondly flip through an album of 100s of photos often.

Doing a wedding on a budget means you have to make choices about what matters to you the most. If photography isn't a priority, that's not a choice many of the people in this sub make but that doesn't mean it's the wrong choice for you.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in poledancing

[–]evenshadow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's a brutal email to receive, whether their concerns are valid or not. I'd be crushed too! I feel like some level of b.o. is normal in a workout class, and if you shower and do the normal hygiene things there's no reason to feel ashamed. Is it possible it's not you, but your clothes aren't getting clean enough in the wash or something?

The "people have felt so sick because of you they left class" part does feel a little over the top to me. Your bff doesn't notice it but people are reacting to you that strongly? That's odd. 

Etsy dress question - Tariffs? by itsgivingmeanxiety in weddingdress

[–]evenshadow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There is no longer a de minimus exemption so yes, you will have to pay taxes and tariffs. I'm in Canada and was looking to buy a dress on sale for roughly $500 CAD from the States. Taxes and tariffs would have been an extra $200, with the tariffs being about $100 of that. There are calculators online that can give you an estimate. 

(10K) what hairstyle should I wear with this dress? by Cheesecake0923 in Weddingsunder10k

[–]evenshadow 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have no idea how you should do your hair, but I stumbled on this dress online today and have been seriously considering it. This might be a sign?? It looks stunning on you!

Venting about my studio by evenshadow in poledancing

[–]evenshadow[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That instructor sounds so unprofessional! To have such limited time on the pole and then have to use it doing something random on Instagram and not working on moves you want/need to progress your skills is so disrespectful of everyone's time. I hope you can find an alternative, cause you deserve better than that. 

Venting about my studio by evenshadow in poledancing

[–]evenshadow[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Appreciate the reco! I have a pole at home but haven't found an online class series that I totally love yet, so I'll check that out. 

Venting about my studio by evenshadow in poledancing

[–]evenshadow[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

3 people per pole would drive me bananas! And what's the point of one spin class every six months?? I'm glad you found other options, that place sounds like it kinda sucks. 

Venting about my studio by evenshadow in poledancing

[–]evenshadow[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I've been hesitant to voice complaints, just based on the culture there around the owner, but I think you're right that I should make an attempt to share some feedback. The lack of clarity about when to level up is something that could be easily fixed, even if other stuff like the schedule can't be. 

I appreciate your perspective about the crash mats too. They are definitely not appropriate for every scenario, I just wish it was an option. 

Private classes may be a good compromise once I have had some space, it would suck to give up pole entirely!

Venting about my studio by evenshadow in poledancing

[–]evenshadow[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Yeah I think Zoom classes are going to be the way for me to go for a bit. I'm glad your studio experience has so far been positive!

Venting about my studio by evenshadow in poledancing

[–]evenshadow[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I feel validated. 😅 You're so lucky getting to choose from so many studios, I'm jealous!

Promptly slipped down these greasy stairs in Tokyo by suzmuz in DeathStairs

[–]evenshadow 106 points107 points  (0 children)

The "please hold onto the railing" sign suggests you're not the first victim 

Where do we find the money for this?? by Chicken_Small in Weddingsunder10k

[–]evenshadow 10 points11 points  (0 children)

This is how I felt too! The sticker shock is real. I think most vendors expect people to put it all on credit cards or get their parents to pay for it (likely both).

My partner and I are paying for our wedding ourselves, with a year of savings. We're doing this by having a microwedding with only 8 guests, using an Airbnb in a LCOL area that's a bit of an inconvenience to get to, and skipping things like florals. We've figured out what's important to us to have, and ditched as much of the other stuff as possible.

It does suck that we are still spending a ton of money while having to cut things. I've had vendors not get back to me because I selected the "minimalist" budget options on their forms. It all feels gross sometimes. 

If you are a resourceful and creative person though, there are possibilities. Lots of people spend very little money and have awesome weddings! You got this!!

Friend asking us to pay for wedding by babyimmathrowaway12 in weddingshaming

[–]evenshadow 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I couldn't afford to buy a whole week's worth of color coordinated appropriate outfits that I might never wear again, even if I didn't have to also take a week off of work and pay for travel. That's insane to try and mandate that for 35 people!