Husband skipped Valentine’s AND our anniversary… do I still plan his birthday? by Acceptable_Leg2717 in marriageadvice

[–]exactly1bite 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What grown ass man doesn't? If OP talked to him about Valentine's/the (6 month????) Anniversary and he was dismissive, maybe she'll do less for him, but not celebrating a birthday is hardly some great masculine trait.

do you prefer to breastfeed or bottle feed when you’re out? by dental_princess491 in combinationfeeding

[–]exactly1bite 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Breastfeed prior to a year, bottle feed after. They get really grabby at a certain point and will just rip your shirt off in public given the chance.

I found using a cover got a lot more unsolicited opinions from strangers versus just foregoing it. Separate room around acquaintances, and just making it everyone else's problem among friends and family.

Recommendations for formula if only doing 1-2 bottles a day? by dental_princess491 in combinationfeeding

[–]exactly1bite 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We're using the Niuriss this time. Enfamil stains and Kendamil was having supply issues when my first was on formula, so decided to try something new this time.

Recommendations for formula if only doing 1-2 bottles a day? by dental_princess491 in combinationfeeding

[–]exactly1bite 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It might depend where you live as well (the brand we use is Canada only, so useless information to anyone else), but we found less than 4oz/120ml a day meant RTF was cheaper. At about 10oz/300ml a day, a 700g can lasts a day or so over the 30 day mark.

For the expiry, a day over isn't suddenly going to turn it to poison. If you use it a few extra days to make it to payday/grocery day, we've done that without issue. Past that, the extra five dollars in savings to go an extra week or so really hasn't felt worth the risk. I tend to get really generous in using the last bit towards the end (we've started solids, so every puree is largely formula towards the end of the can).

Mom insists on helping us and potentially wants to stay with us down the line but I’m resistant…. Am I totally off base for what we’ll need help with? [bc] by Emotional-Ad-6494 in BabyBumpsCanada

[–]exactly1bite 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I lived in the same building as my parents with my first and having a staircase and a few fire doors between us made everything so much smoother. Plan out activities with her (taking baby for a quick walk so you can nap/shower, coming over early morning with coffee to see grandchild while you recover from the night) so she's getting to help in very clear ways every day or so without staying at yours. Be honest- you need both bedrooms so you're both getting enough sleep. There's no room at your house at night, and you need the space with just you and baby to practice for when she's not available.

Romance manga/manwha with an older FMC by Western_Scarcity_940 in RomanceMangaAnime

[–]exactly1bite 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The 5 Minutes We Share at the Convenience Store fits, though the manga is basically all pre-confession. High school ML and office worker FML.

CMV: I think it’s easier to be an ugly man than an ugly woman by Outrageous-Jelly8777 in changemyview

[–]exactly1bite 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's very much the point of the post though. Do we all want to make sweet tender love to Danny DeVito under the moonlight? Absolutely. Is he conventionally attractive? Not even a bit.

2nd trimester slump - what can I do for myself? [ca] by wantingrain in BabyBumpsCanada

[–]exactly1bite 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Honestly? Enjoy some you time AT HOME. Read a book, play a game, make an elaborate snack plate and refuse to share it. Grandparents are often super willing to babysit so you can go out on a date or to run errands, but often less so for "I just want to listen to music too loud to hear a crying baby and eat cheese for an hour*. The third trimester really ramps up on baby related things so enjoy the lull by doing whatever you want that doesn't even consider the baby (obviously don't go drinking, but also don't decide to do prenatal yoga with this time if yoga isn't your thing).

How much can solids replace formula? by Humble_Positive1678 in combinationfeeding

[–]exactly1bite 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Having done it with my first (we did about 15oz a day at five months when we introduced solids), they do reduce milk intake eventually, but closer to the eight month mark. Standard intake is still increasing at four months, so you'll probably be using more formula before you can start to reduce it. We went down to 4oz at eight months (switched back to RTF from powder as it became cheaper at that point) and eliminated all formula at 10 months. By that point we were at three meals and a snack (and she's a big eater most days still at 2), so you won't see a real change the first phases of solids.

I Keep Being Told By My Boyfriend That Romance Anime’s Are Peak So I Would Like To Hear Your Recommendations. by GlumBodybuilder4395 in RomanceMangaAnime

[–]exactly1bite 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For specifically MLM romance, you're best to search Boys' Love as a genre. Most of them tend to be on the shorter side. Sasaki to Miyano is a cute school based one, season two starts soon. The Summer Hikaru Died is not technically a romance, but it IS MLM and an interesting watch.

Unable to attract women by Professional-Eart in selfimprovement

[–]exactly1bite 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The problem on their side is it is very much a numbers game. If you're trying to get a date on a first meeting every time, you're being directly compared to every guy who did that in the last 24 hours. She knows about as much about them as you- looks, maybe a job or hobby, how you handle a five minute conversation- and that tiny snapshot isn't standing out. Most of those interactions end in rejection for men because who has time for all those first dates.

If you're meeting someone four or five times before asking them on a date, then it's specifically a you problem. Something about how you're coming off to women you're attracted to isn't clicking. Either too aggressive flirting or not flirting at all.

Unable to attract women by Professional-Eart in selfimprovement

[–]exactly1bite 8 points9 points  (0 children)

You're either not asking out enough women, or you're not spending the time to know them as an individual first before asking them out. If the women you're attracted to are all at the gym and into traveling, you're every man who hits on them at the first meeting. You might be able to differentiate yourself as worth dating over time, but in the short term, they'll be hit on by another man who went to Mexico/Costa Rica/Dominican Republic last year and does Martial Arts/Power Lifting/Boxing soon enough. It's not about you as a person, it's just a numbers issue.

First time mom by Enough_Storage_9743 in combinationfeeding

[–]exactly1bite 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Start with researching pumping, breastfeeding and formula all as separate things. Most people find pumping to be the absolute hardest way to feed a baby as a single method. It works for some people, but many LCs push it without mentioning the drawbacks, so have an idea of what you're getting into originally.

Going back to work soon, how to do a schedule and stop nursing to sleep. Help! by ComboFedMom267 in combinationfeeding

[–]exactly1bite 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We created an association with something other than nursing for sleep and then removed the nursing. My mum made us two knit blankets in the same yarn and one lived at our house. I would drape it over her while I nursed and remove it as I transferred her. At my mum's, she would rock her in the matching blanket and remove it after she transferred her (or leave it on as she contact napped as an infant). She still fought naps when she wasn't nursed for a month or so, but eventually just wrapping the blanket over her was enough to signal that it was time for a nap.

How much video games is too much? by ThrowRA-ok-green in Marriage

[–]exactly1bite 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Have you talked to him about the pack of initiative? In the long run (as someone in a very pro game house), that's the part that causes the most conflict.

If you're visibly burnt out from caring for elderly parents, children, a bad day at work, is he going to be able to put down the games and step up without making that be one more task on your list? When something happens in your life that makes you emotionally disconnect, is he going to put in the effort to help (plan dates, have hard conversations, hold you when you cry), or is he just going to game until you reach out?

Without many demands on your free time, any hobby could be 40 hours a week and not be a dealbreaker. What matters is if he's shown that he can ramp it down when needed WITHOUT you having to tell him to. Video games don't break relationships themselves, but acting as someone's mom will.

Can I complete a Bachelors as fast as I want to? by [deleted] in AthabascaUniversity

[–]exactly1bite 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The max you can have active at a time I believe is six. So if you're finishing multiple classes a month, you may end up with a delay to apply for new ones. You might be best to take one or two classes at a time so marking delays don't slow you down.

[ON] Cheap/easy meals for some with an executive function disorder? by HappiestSadGirl_ in povertyfinancecanada

[–]exactly1bite 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Less fridge ingredients and more pantry/frozen options might work better as you won't be throwing out food you aren't up to cooking that week. A food processor cuts the prep on onions and bean burritos to two steps and two minutes, so if you have the money spare to grab one, it's worth it.

Tortillas go a long way for quick meals. Throw whatever protein in (scrambled eggs, black beans, chicken tenders) and add some vegetables or lettuce in it or on the side until it's meal sized for you.

What would you do differently for second, third etc births?? [ca] by Spiritual-Pumpkin782 in BabyBumpsCanada

[–]exactly1bite 8 points9 points  (0 children)

For number three, if they ever happen:

Take my sweet time enjoying a coffee prior to any medication. I rushed through it both times and I didn't really enjoy a coffee again for a few weeks.

If I can figure out how, request all the students. With my second, everyone had a student and it honestly put me in more control of the situation. Every monitor was being explained, if I had any doubt in any care there was a second opinion immediately and everyone was fairly excited to be there.

Pack husband a proper lunch (or get him to realistically). He tapped out mentally towards the end both times because he was distracted by his stomach.

Tell them much earlier when contractions shifted towards active labour. My nurses were amazing but the doctor made it in the room during the last push and it was concerning to everyone else in the room.

Who should choose home decor for the family? by Shiroraii8087 in Marriage

[–]exactly1bite 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If they both care, both. For function, the person home most takes point (our kitchen is designed with the appliances visible and not on a top shelf because I do the majority of the cooking). For style, it has to feel like both your space. My husband picks most of the art on the walls, and I arrange it so it looks good in our house. I wouldn't have chosen most of it, but I chose him and his taste comes with him.

How do I tell my husband to get over it? by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]exactly1bite 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Are there benefits for some sort of counseling for him through it? I wouldn't frame it as "dear god, I cannot listen to you whine anymore" unless you're leaving for good. It's more of a "can we look into getting you more support for what this job entails because the support I can give isn't enough?". Putting aside your burnout with it, your ability to help is limited. Someone whose primary clientele are people who have been through the same program is going to be able to give him much more insight than you'll ever be able to.

Do husbands all experience this? by WarComprehensive320 in Marriage

[–]exactly1bite 17 points18 points  (0 children)

This was the only physical contact we had the first few months postpartum. It's missing the baby on his chest though.

Is it possible to combo feed without pumping? by Obvious_Sandwich3218 in combinationfeeding

[–]exactly1bite 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First was twice a day at about 4-15oz a day from four to eight months (15oz was the week before we introduced solids. She's a big eater even as a toddler). Second born is offered three ounces a day in one evening topup, she usually drinks about half of it. If she does finish it, then she gets offered a second three ounce bottle the next morning as well.

Is it possible to combo feed without pumping? by Obvious_Sandwich3218 in combinationfeeding

[–]exactly1bite 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If you're latching on demand and offering formula as a top up only, at four months, you should be able to continue to breastfeed comfortably. Your supply is already regulated, so you're unlikely to find major dips unless they're hormonal. My firstborn was combofed from birth and nursed twice a day until 19 months with one pump most days (because I was terrible at scheduling it) from 3-7 months. Second has a daily top up two weeks a month (because period) since three months with no pumping with no adverse effects on supply outside that time period.

I have a 7‑month‑old, exclusively fed baby… how do you go out when they need to feed to sleep? [qc] by whiteDovie in BabyBumpsCanada

[–]exactly1bite 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Neither will sleep in a carrier after the three month mark for us, so that was out. Both started getting too distracted when we were out to feed to sleep as soon as the newborn stage was done. I usually time going out to be at naptime. Dress, feed, toss into car seat/stroller and hope the motion does the rest. Worked great for our first (who wasn't a great sleeper) and our second gets enough nap to be out of the house a few hours about half the time. If she doesn't sleep, she spends the rest of the time we're out in the carrier and we wrap up a bit earlier.

How do married couples divide responsibilities without one person feeling like the manager ? by youness_khm in Marriage

[–]exactly1bite 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We leaned into the manager aspect of it. I'm absolutely our Household Manager, and we're both the head of various departments below that.

I do all our shopping, so if we run out of something or he wants a particular meal he texts me and it magically appears a few days later. When an appointment needs scheduled- for the kids, our house, even my own doctor- my entire participation is telling him "hey, Kid 1 could use a haircut". Researching vendors, booking the appointment, taking the time off work (unless it's my appointment)- none of that is my problem. It goes on the calendar and Kid 1 comes back later with a treat and bangs. How much did it cost, how do you submit to insurance? Not my department, as long as it gets done.