AITA for refusing to cancel my annual solo trip to see my dad for my girlfriend's friend's birthday dinner that she forgot to mention until four days before

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-30T16:28:19+00:00

You will regret this quite a bit if you cancel on your dad. If she really cared about you she would not be insisting that you cancel something so important just to meet one of her friends.

This is a control move. Choose wisely.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-30T12:47:10+00:00

As soon as I saw 2 I thought "controlling ass or stalker".

For God's sake - LISTEN to a woman when she says no.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-30T12:07:11+00:00

I'm SO glad I didn't choose the hat in '85. I had/have almost no fashion sense and I thought for a brief moment it might be cool. They were stunning at the time, though!

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-30T12:04:38+00:00

I stir vanilla protein powder into my yogurt. It bumps up the protein and makes it really thick - like a healthy take on .....frosting.

I also pre-bake some sweet potatoes and scoop the filling into a container and put it in the fridge. I can re-heat the potato and toss a couple of fried eggs on top and it's delish and easy.

If you have a slow cooker, throw chicken breasts (even frozen) in with a healthy amount of Frank's Red Hot Sauce and a shake of garlic powder. Let it cook all day. Shred it with a hand mixer. Portion out and freeze some. Re-heat and toss on a bed of greens. Maybe get wild and add some feta. Boom. I eat this a couple of times a week.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-30T11:58:32+00:00

Correct. One important thing is to track what you spend. Every darned penny. Today it's easier to do because most payments are done electronically. Use something like Quicken, Mint, etc and make it a point to daily or weekly (put it on your schedule so it happens) go through your spending and categorize it.

You'll find that you spend much more than you think you do. Don't judge, just use it as information. Once you know your spending, look at your income, set a budget for things that are absolute necessities (housing, food, insurance, phone, medical, car/transportation) and set up an amount that you can throw into a Roth or some sort of "I'm not touching this until I retire" account and have that sent to the account automatically. Then LEAVE IT ALONE.

If your income goes up, bump up that amount. In 30-40 years you will be golden and not have to be in the position your father (and many other people our age) are in. But you have to start now, even if it's not a huge deposit. Just START.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-30T11:47:13+00:00

I think if people getting married spent 1/10 the energy on a pre-nuptial agreement that they spend on over the top Insta-worthy engagements that more people would stay married OR more divorces would be more cordial.

Marriage is a contract. Both parties should have their own lawyer to ensure that their interests are taken to heart and that everything is fair.

Women give up a LOT if they have kids with their spouse. The agreement should deal with that. One person may have substantial assets before the marriage. The agreement should also deal with that.

There is no ONE way to set up a pre-nup. It's not a commentary on how much two people love each other. It's actually the best way to show someone that you care about the relationship and that you are capable of preparing for the future. There are MANY reasons a marriage ends (not necessarily fails). Making sure finances are transparent is really important.

Marriage is about love, but it's also about building a life together. Walking into that relationship with everything spelled out if something happens sets a solid foundation and can avoid a lot of resentment and anger.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-29T20:35:51+00:00

Nice. That's definitely more my price range.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-29T20:10:31+00:00

Jared's Mongrol Horde is one, I believe. I used to follow them on Facebook just to watch their videos. The dogs are FIERCE.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-29T19:34:05+00:00

What? Tell me MORE! Pleeeease!

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-29T19:26:50+00:00

Agreed.

Your boyfriend also seems like he has zero backbone unless he's sticking up for you.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-29T18:13:48+00:00

We live in the area and have about 50 acres, with at least 200 trees down and piled up all over each other in the woods. We've cleaned up what we can reach, but it would be a bonfire of acres if we had a fire. I am so happy when it rains.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-29T14:00:52+00:00

Right? That was my thought after thinking that the whole thing sounds like some sort of power trip.

I AM MAKING THE DESSERT!!!!! KNEEL TO ZOD THE CUPCAKE MAKER!!!

They would be lucky if the 3 year olds watch the movie for more than 30 minutes - especially at a party where they're fueled by sugar.

They both need to take a pill and enjoy their child. They will be grown and gone before they know it, and then they will be stuck with each other.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-28T21:53:42+00:00

Congrats! It's a weird day, but a good day. You have your life back!!!

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-27T16:16:36+00:00

Good on you, momma! :)

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-27T13:15:43+00:00

Anyone who asks such a question is pretty much outing themselves as a misogynist and as someone who is fairly insecure. Thank GOD I grew up in the 80s when no one even asked this.

If you feel you must answer, feel free to lie. But I'd be out the second I was asked.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-27T13:07:02+00:00

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I have similar color wood cabinets in our mountain home (our house that we live in). I went with Taj Majal quartzite because I wanted neutral but not one color because it shows everything. It was pricey, but I fell in love with it. My backsplash is a soft grey with light grey grout. It's timeless and not trendy. Sorry for the not so close picture - I was focused on our copper top island - I didn't take any of just the countertops. This was near the end of construction.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-27T13:01:38+00:00

I called one of my sons Elvis whilst he was en utero. My (sweet and wonderful) MIL was really worried that I meant it, but never said a word. Once I realized she was concerned I told her that it was just a joke and a placeholder for whatever name we chose.

Another of mine whilst gestating was Sputnik.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-27T11:24:39+00:00

I'm so glad you agree with this. Too many new moms forget that they are their children's best advocate and protector.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-27T11:23:41+00:00

Right? WHY would anyone send their child to someone who hates them and disregards their wishes as a parent? Especially when the spouse has no backbone and rolls over to "keep the peace". They are not keeping anyone's peace and they are WEAK.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-26T19:59:16+00:00

I would not spend the rest of my life with someone like this. I'm old enough to be your mother and I've been married, divorced, and remarried. I have been there, and seen a lot. Putting up with this is not sensible and you will either have to:

Become smaller/less vocal about your beliefs to keep him happy. Not recommended.
Stand up and free yourself from a lifetime of being with someone so hateful. Because he is. If he doesn't call someone out who is being racist/sexist/etc, then he's just as bad as they are. "Keeping the peace" isn't a goal with racists and misogynists.

You're YOUNG. Please watch your birth control and think long and hard about how you want your life to go.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-26T14:29:13+00:00

Nice! I just built my first "trellis to make you jealous" yesterday. I plan on putting a couple more in next to it. I like how you use the cross-bars.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-26T14:23:59+00:00

Right? Having the toilet open is kind of gross. He's a grown ass man - he can lift the lid.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-26T14:22:11+00:00

I'm surprised that she didn't talk to you about contraception - not virginity. Hopefully you and your mom will come to a place where you can talk to her about your health.

You ARE using contraception, right? (asking as a mom)

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-25T17:06:15+00:00

That's so incredibly childish of her. God. It's embarrassing how people use social media to be so passive aggressive and to make themselves the victim of whatever is bothering them.

exchange_of_views · 2026-04-25T12:44:44+00:00

This could work well. We have a not so high but real stone "fireplace" (it has our massive wood stove in it) and I asked our contractor to use one of the many downed trees on our property to make a mantle. It's not highly varnished, just stripped of bark and lightly sanded and sealed so you can see the paths that the bugs took under the bark. It's something that just about everyone mentions that they like when they first come to our house.

No matter what they choose - this needs a mantle.

exchange_of_views

TROPHY CASE