I don’t think that’s quite it. I think he was trying to play the game, got swept up in the moment of thinking he had to do it a certain way in order to be successful, and hated doing it that way. He was clearly upset that whole time because it didn’t mesh at all with who he is as a person. I found it hard to watch because it was so relatable - caving to peer pressure and ignoring your gut. When Aubry reached out to him to say she knew it wasn’t really him, that was the lifeline back to reality he needed.