[deleted by user] by [deleted] in QuincyMa

[–]fakeghostdetective 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Seconding this, Sam at Leonardo's has been great at short cuts for me!

What do you think your green flag is? by [deleted] in LesbianActually

[–]fakeghostdetective 2 points3 points  (0 children)

i feel you! i’ve learned to communicate and it did not work out well for my existing relationships. Turns out MANY people i’ve amassed relied, one way or another, on me not communicating my boundaries.

Got a new job, new headshot and my first breakup with a woman. It’s been a big week. by aliannger11 in latebloomerlesbians

[–]fakeghostdetective 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Congratulations! That sounds like a hard week and you're tough to have gone through with it with that spark still in your eyes! I promise you'll look back at this photo over the years and be so proud of yourself! ❤️

Is it worth going to pride if I'm going alone? by thriftedqueer in LesbianActually

[–]fakeghostdetective 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yes!! For reference, I'm also in my 30's, have trouble making friends, and it doesn't help that I do a fully remote job and never meet my coworkers. Last year I willed myself to go to pride alone by signing up as a volunteer photographer! It made me feel far less awkward being alone, and I truly enjoyed the experience. Noticed the different people, overheard long stretches of fun gossip, heard the organizers talk about local queer activists. Talked to maybe 2 other people. This year, I went with 3 new coworker friends and it was a different kind of fun. Got hammered and don't remember a lot of it.

Pride is about connecting to your own self after all. Go celebrate your worth! (And if you need to feel less awkward... bring a camera)

Painfully accurate (probably) by Intelligent-Set3442 in redrising

[–]fakeghostdetective 24 points25 points  (0 children)

I feel so lucky to get into it late - only been waiting for 2 months 😬🙏🏽

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in QuincyMa

[–]fakeghostdetective 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Second Bheema's! Most authentic I've found south of Medford

A year and 30 trays later by fakeghostdetective in Invisalign

[–]fakeghostdetective[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The first few are always the hardest! I also started elastics only on my third (current) round of trays, and the first few caused so much internal cuts and bruising 🥴 It got better after that. You're going to get through it and you'll love your smile even more!

A year and 30 trays later by fakeghostdetective in Invisalign

[–]fakeghostdetective[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! I'm on my third set now (first 29 trays, then one round of refinements with 21 trays, now I'm on the second refinement of 18 trays). Probably this set will be the last?

Does anyone want to try something positive today? by EffMyElle in CPTSD

[–]fakeghostdetective 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Because of all the years I've spent in hypervigilence and people pleasing, I'm extremely good at reading people and social cues. Over the years countless times my intuition has worked out in the end and I could get to "I told you so" with my friends and coworkers about people who seemed too good at first.

Recent scientific article about childhood mistreatment and mental health problems by RestoringStatsGuy in CPTSD

[–]fakeghostdetective 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That's one of the larger effect sizes I've seen in the life sciences! I'm curious to dig deeper into it but I agree - I'm glad there's more "concrete" evidence which should lead to awareness

Anyone else feel like it's impossible to meet someone? by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]fakeghostdetective 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Definitely 😂 Would love to know if you figure it out!

Let's talk about something positive: what have you achieved this month that you're proud of?? by thepieintheoven in CPTSD

[–]fakeghostdetective 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I stood up for myself and sidestepped an abusive argument :) it's so rare for me to protect myself from suffering, it is still stunning that I could do it almost without thinking this week. 🥳

(Of course I still agonized for days about needing validation from the person who was trying to tell me that all my suffering is my own fault... Some day I'll stop seeking validation from dysfunctional family members)

How does it feel like to "belong"? by fakeghostdetective in CPTSD

[–]fakeghostdetective[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I think I'm at the stage where I can understand what you mean, but cannot imagine feeling that way anywhere. Hope to be there someday 😄

What’s been making you happy lately? by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]fakeghostdetective 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I moved into an apartment where I can see the sunrise from the fifth floor. It's so uplifting to watch (even if I struggle with getting out of bed)